


Never Easy, But Always Worth It

by GingerEnvy



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Captivity, Clint Needs a Hug, Depression, Human Experimentation, Misunderstandings, Mpreg, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Postpartum Depression, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rejection, Steve needs one too, dubcon, inhumane treatment, or a lot, skewed views, so does tony
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-22
Updated: 2015-11-21
Packaged: 2018-04-18 15:16:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 52,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4710653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GingerEnvy/pseuds/GingerEnvy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers are a Pack, they're good together, they fight and live and survive together, but suddenly Clint gets taken and everything shifts from then on out, and when he's rescued things will never be the same for them.</p><p>UNDER REVISION</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avengers fight some things and Clint goes missing, great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! I am so happy to finally post the first chapter! I was overwhelmed with the amount of excitement I got when I posted my teasing blurb (which really was a tease, it had absolutely no context for the story in it, sorry, not sorry! XD)!  
> But anywho, I hope you all enjoy, and please ask if you have ANY questions about the A/B/O dynamics, if I don't answer them in the story, I'll be sure to answer them here, I know they can vary from story to story and I'd be happy to clear things up.
> 
> Anywho, thank you kindly and Happy reading!

Alpha, Beta, Omega, the world would be so much easier if those were the only options to be born with, but they’re not. Each one has even more that are possible as you grow and your very childhood does help to define what you become. Nature gives you the building blocks and the rest is up to you and those who care for you.

The dynamics are as listed:

Alpha - one who is born to be protective, occasionally aggressive and the sperm donor to a bearer to have children. Usually raised to be leaders and the backbone of a family structure, Alphas are important to be strong and resilient to support one’s family and at times a community. Likely raised in a household with a strong Alpha figure at the forefront. 

Alpha Neutral - one that has all of the same traits as an Alpha but does not wish to mate with a bearer, and instead chooses no mate or a mate of a non-bearer status. They are also important for the same reasons, but are just less likely to be the head Alpha of a community. They were likely raised in a household that is smaller than a normal community.

Beta - one who is seen as the support, are able to fit any role if necessary, they are flexible and compliant and an integral part of any community, they are also the ones most likely to calm either dynamic because of their lack of intense hormones. Raised by a steady and reassuring influence in their life.

Beta Switch - one who is more aptly able to fill any role, they have the ability to both impregnate and be impregnated by other dynamics, in recent it has been found much easier for them to take hormones to be either an Alpha or an Omega in entirety, they are also calm and reasonable even under those circumstances. Usually raised by many and influenced to be open to the world.

Omega - one who is the caregiver and underlying foundation for any good community, they are the bearers and yet the fiercest fighters in times of need. More likely to be raised by other Omegas. 

Omega Neutral - one who is more likely to be the defender because they have less chance of commitments to children and are more drawn to other jobs in the community, but are able to stand in for other omegas if the need arises. Usually raised in a large community with less need for regular omegas.

 

Of course things were not as cut and dry as all that, but those were the basics, Alphas were the leaders, Betas were the followers, and Omegas were the caregivers and ones who you really didn’t want to fuck with. And with the whole female or male thing, there was the chance of being one of twelve dynamics when you were in the womb. Sex and main dynamic happen when you were born so that sort of narrowed it down to begin with but still twelve possibilities and Clint had to get stuck with what he thought was the worst of them all.

He was a Switch.

They weren’t common sure, but there were obviously enough of them to have their own damn category, unlike Natasha who was special. He’d been raised by too many people for his dynamic to settle, and thus he was flexible to the point of insanity. He could be a father, or he could be a mother, and that was just plain scary. And it could prove to be problematic in his line of work, so he’d gotten a Neutralizer, something that would prevent him from getting pregnant and from getting anyone else pregnant, it was like birth control inserts for omegas, but made specifically for Switches to cover both ‘ends’, as it were. Even if it was a little hard for either to happen without medical intervention or a closeness to either dynamic (that was how it had been done before modern advances; a switch wanting to be one or the other would shadow an alpha or omega and ‘borrow’ their hormones for several months) or hormone injections of either an Alpha or Omega to get the Switch body to focus on either gender. Clint wasn’t that worried about it these days. His job was more important.

He was still an Avenger and he still did his job exceptionally, so it wasn’t a big deal what he was, and when they'd all decided to move into the Tower to try and make it work the others had tiptoed around him at first, obviously having not been around a Switch before, but they had gotten over it once they realized he wasn’t going to suddenly just be one or the other because of proximity. Honestly knowledge was power and it was common knowledge that it took a lot more than that. Even if he was around them long enough, he’d need to be in the proper mindset of Alpha or Omega to stay that way for the duration of a heat or rut, it would fade eventually, but it lasted long enough for that. It took time and effort and Clint wasn’t about to do put any in any of that (unless they were avoiding him because of the Loki thing, which made more sense but he'd rather not think about that so he'd just pretend to be confused).

As a group, they were decently balanced, for the most part, it had been rocky in the start, but now, they were pretty well used to each other by now and things would maybe end up pretty good if they kept at it. Who knows maybe their pack could really work out well.

Steve and Tony were both Alphas, which probably explained why they butted heads so much, Bruce was an Omega, as was Hulk but he was like a Super Omega, either way, no one messed with them. Thor wasn’t really anything, as Asgard didn’t have dynamics, but he was classified as a Beta for paperwork purposes. And Natasha was a Beta Neutral, she could switch on command, or be nothing at all, completely neutral, however that was from what the Red Room had done to her and not natural.

They made a damn good team most days, when Tony was actually being cooperative and Steve wasn’t exuding Alpha all over the place. They watched each other’s backs, they had been told to consider making themselves a lead pack, and that a community might be happening in the near future for the whole of the Avengers Initiative. More ‘heroes’ to help out would be good, and it wasn’t like the Tower didn’t have room for a community.

A community was several packs that all lived together and worked together to live as optimally as possible, and having other smaller packs to go out and fight when they couldn’t for some reason, a heat or a rut, would be very helpful.

Currently, however, Clint didn’t think more heroes would help any as they were fighting a whole bunch of itty bitty robot bugs and when you destroyed one about a thousand more appeared. He was perched up on a building in the city, Cap was down on the street a few blocks away, and Natasha was around the corner, Hulk was lumbering around and batting at them as best he could and Tony was flying around obviously frustrated by the minibots.

“Seriously, whoever thought of these was an idiot,” Tony snarled as he unsuccessfully tried to blast the damn things with his repulsors.  
  
“You’re just pissed you didn’t make them yourself,” Clint drawled and heard several angry repulsor blasts in quick succession in response, he snickered, but was having pretty limited success himself, as there were too many for him to take out with his arrows and he only had a few putty ones left, and had already used up all of his exploding ones, so he really had no room to talk when it came to getting rid of more than a handful at a time.

“Please, if I made micro sized robots they would be much better than this- oh wait, I have, they clean the bloodstream and attack cancerous cells, they also are not hive minded like these damn bugs,” he replied.

“Well try to find what’s controlling them, Tony, there isn’t anything a whole bunch of muscles can do against them,” Captain America broke in, “They aren’t even harming anything. They’re just flying around.”

“They’re just annoying,” Clint drawled just as he let loose his last putty arrow and got a whole swarm of them, it would keep them down at least, a whole hundred of them out of the million there were, “Which is worse than destruction, really.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m on it, I can’t- huh…” Tony said, “They’re scanning things, their processors are so small I didn’t get a read on that until now.”

“Is that good?” Steve asked and Tony made a noise that was neither here nor there.

“Basically...he has no idea,” Clint snorted, swatting at a small swarm of the things in his face, “Well...whatever, can you just shut them down? I was in the middle of the Game of Thrones season finale.”

“Don’t say a word, Barton, I’m still two episodes behind,” Natasha said, from down on the street, also really unable to do anything, she’d tried using her widow bites on them, but she had to be in direct contact with them for it to work.

“I must express my like for that tale, the Stark Family is very honorable,” Thor said, swinging his hammer around idly, he could bring lightning down on all of them, but simply because there were so many, it would cause more destruction than help. Clint grinned, but had to swat away more of the robots as they crowded his face, only for more to appear.

“You would like them, they are the best house anyway, I like Jon Snow personally,” Clint said, slapping them away again, was it just him or were there more appearing in his face every time he moved?

“There’s a reason the Starks' are the coolest,” Tony said and Clint and Natasha snorted in unison, “They were named after me, I know George R.R. Martin.”

“Keep telling yourself that, Stark,” Clint replied shaking his head and then scowling when he saw even more of the damn bugs out of his periphery. What the actual fuck?

“Name dropping, Stark. I like Tyrion,” Natasha said, “And Daenarys of course.”

“You would like Khaleesi,” Clint teased, though he knew of her preferences already, he grunted again swatting at more, “Is anyone getting like mobbed by these damn things?”

“No,” many voices replied at once and Clint frowned.

“I am, they seem to like me, I’m coming down cause I can’t do shit from up here,” he said and equipped a grappling arrow and rappelled down to the ground where the others were now gathered, waiting for Tony to find the source.

Natasha was leaning against a car, still on high alert, just in case, Cap was standing a ways away, also making sure no one was in danger, and keeping the people inside. Thor was spinning his hammer around idly, bored and poor Hulk was sitting on a car up ahead, pouting and also swatting at the robots in his face half heartedly. Clint chuckled and went over to him, setting a hand on his arm.

“No smash, Buddy?” he asked and Hulk snorted.

“Puny bugs,” he grunted, “Cupid no shoot?”

“Puny bugs,” Clint agreed and Hulk cracked a huge feral grin. Yeah, Clint liked the Hulk, he was pretty great.

“I’ve found the transmitter, the damn things will die shortly! All we have left to do is sweep them under the rug,” Tony said and the rest of the Avengers gave a collective sigh of relief, not being able to do anything was incredibly frustrating.

“Great, take it out and we’ll call in SHIELD and they can bring the brooms,” Steve said, “We can help this time, since we didn’t do much else.”

“Hey, I took out like...at least five hundred of them,” Clint argued, “That counts as something.”

“Whatever you say, Hawkeye,” Steve replied shooting him a teasing smirk, Clint stuck his tongue out at him because he was mature.

A second later all of the robots fritzed and then fell to the ground, making one hell of a mess to clean up, there had to be millions of them now making the streets look like they were covered in black hail.

“Oh this is going to be fun,” Clint grumbled and Hulk grunted.

“Cupid dumb, not fun,” he said and Clint poked him in the side in retaliation, Hulk grinned again.

“Smart ass,” Clint teased, leaning against him and waiting for SHIELD to arrive, he knew they needed to help the cleaning effort, PR reasons and what not, but he really wanted to see what happened next in the show! He had to pause during one of the intense moments, which was the worst possible time. He was also hungry, he hadn’t eaten since the night before because he was dumb and forgot. Oops. There was a reason Bruce had his work cut out for him as the ‘caregiver’, only Steve seemed to remember to eat and that was because he had to eat so much, and Thor just ate whenever he stepped near the kitchen, Bruce kept it well stocked, he was thoughtful, Clint hoped he was taking care of himself too. Natasha was always at her best so she ate regularly. It was mainly just him and Tony who forgot to eat. Clint was better than Tony, he tended to wander into the kitchen when he was starving, Tony just ignored it. Bruce had to drag him up from the lab most days, but he had dragged Clint away from the range a few times. Clint let out a breath, man Bruce was way too nice, Clint would let everyone deal on their own if he was the omega.

He glanced over when he saw one of the SHIELD vans come down the street and some agents came spilling out carrying various tools for collecting the robot bugs. One of them came over to them and met Steve halfway.

“Captain Rogers, I’m Agent Swanson, we’re here to help out with the cleaning effort,” a woman said, she was an Alpha Neutral from what Clint could tell, “We have agents on each block from here to the bridges, there were a lot of the buggers.”

“That there were, Agent Swanson. Alright, we’ll start over on this side, also might want to check and make sure none of the civilians were hurt just in case,” he gestured to the people now coming out of the shops and buildings nearby. The agent nodded and then went off to direct the others. Clint noted that when many of the civilians were cleared from the medical staff they offered to help clean up.

He smiled, that was pretty awesome of them, made him feel all warm and fuzzy, just a little, probably because he wasn’t used to people watching out for people who weren’t pack or community, he sighed a little. In any case, it was going to take hours to clean up these things the more hands there were the faster it would go, hopefully. He pushed himself up, slipped his bow around his back and grabbed one of the brooms and trashcans being handed out and started sweeping, had to start somewhere, he glanced at Hulk who was just using his hands, and of course smashing them between them before he dumped them in a dumpster. Clint chuckled and then headed off to do his share. He’d take the huge pile near the doughnut bakery. And maybe sneak a few if they were open. He was still hungry after all.

Clint got his designated area clean within an hour, but it was in between a few people asking for autographs or selfies, he was finally able to get a breather and look around, he noted where there seemed to be more bugs than other places and frowned, was there a pattern to the annoyingness? He frowned again and set his cleaning stuff down to investigate. He could just be paranoid, but it was always best to just check and make sure. And he had a bit of a knack for seeing things other people didn't.

He wandered down an alley that still had a huge pile of the bugs, it was at least a foot high, he pushed through them, to the small mountain in the back of the alley, he brushed them away, wondering if there would just be more, but it turned out to be something else, a cone shaped thing with buttons and lights that were dark at the moment and a little hole at the bottom, another transmitter?

“Hey, Stark, where was the transmitter?” Clint asked over the comm.

“ _It was on top of one of the office buildings a few blocks away, disguised as an antenna, why?_ ” Tony replied and Clint figured it was probably good to get someone who was a little more tech savvy than he was over here.

“Well I just found a….a thing?” he offered, “A second transmitter maybe? It’s not active but, just thought you should-” he yelped as it suddenly light up, “Just kidding.”

“ _Bad Hawkeye, no touching!_ ” Tony snapped, sounding exasperated.

“It was totally not my fault!” Clint replied and was just glad the bugs were still dead and- wait...were they disappearing? “Hey actually this might be a good thing, they’re leaving, we can find out where they came from!” Clint said but frowned when he didn’t get a response. “Tony? Nat?”

There was still radio silence, “Great,” he muttered, pulling his bow off his back and nocking an arrow, still staring at the thing, it was glowing blue, and he was definitely sure the robots were disappearing now, through the hole at the bottom it was just sucking them in, hey that made cleanup easier at least. Go Hawkeye.

He figured he was going to regret it anyway, something bad was bound to happen. It always did.

“You will not be needing those anymore,” a voice said and Clint hated dramatic segues, he turned around arrow up and aimed at the speaker before he was done spinning, but the man, whoever he was -he’d come and shaken his hand earlier dammit!- only smiled, and then Clint could feel the damn bugs moving around much more quickly than they had been and he was suddenly he was thigh deep in them and then some, they were climbing over each other to get higher and higher to encase him.

“That’s gross…” he muttered and then glared at the guy again aiming for his head, “I am very tempted to shoot you in the eye right now.”

“You will be much easier to handle than the Omega, I am so glad this little experiment turned out so well,” he replied completely at random, as if he hadn’t heard Clint at all.

Clint frowned, the dude had been after Hulk but was gonna do something with him as a second option? That was not reassuring at all. “You know you’re really cliche right?”

“I’m afraid that you are too, my friend,” he said with a pleasant smile and then Clint yelped as he was suddenly pulled down under the pile of bugs, his arrow flying, but not making contact with the man, only bouncing off the alley wall and disappearing in the bugbots, he was totally covered in the damn things now, and holy shit when did they get so strong?

He jerked around and tried to get them off, but there were just too many and he was already covered, and it was overwhelming, he couldn’t fight or free himself from things so small, they were all working together to keep him down and suddenly his bow was gone and he couldn’t even move at all, he was dragged down, down, down and he could only see the sky and the tops of the buildings. He opened his mouth to shout for help, but he was muffled by the damn things crawling into his mouth the second they had the chance and god that was disgusting, over his tongue and teeth and down his throat, he choked and gagged uselessly, and then his ears were invaded and everything was muffled until there was silence he couldn’t hear. And Jesus they were everywhere! He wanted- _needed_ out!

He struggled as hard as possible, but it was useless he was was pulled down and disappeared from view, the bugs closing over his face so he could see nothing but darkness and not being able to see anything was the worst thing for him to experience, he had to will himself not to panic, even though oh he really wanted to panic. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing, but that was getting harder and harder. And then he started to get light headed, lack of air? Panic? Drugs? He had no idea now, but soon enough, he was passed out, limp and easily maneuvered, and the man was pretending like he was helping with the clean up effort, having no idea what was going on with the Avengers who were worried about their teammate suddenly not responding on comms.

The man tapped the remote on his wristwatch and the robots started moving the unconscious man out of the alley into a hidden hole in the side of the building, by the time anyone got here, he would be gone and the project would be well under way.

 

~

 

“ _It was totally not my_ -”

“Hawkeye!” Tony snapped when he suddenly went off comm and the only response when he hailed him on the emergency lines was silence, “Shit!”

“Does anyone have eyes on Hawkeye?” Steve said immediately, “Tony go where he was, Thor do you see him?”

“Nay, friend I am looking from above and I see him nowhere within my sights,” Thor said gravely, the sound of his hammer spinning in the background.

“He was over on 53rd last time I checked,” Tony said, “He found something, I swear, if he got himself into trouble, he’s not allowed to leave the Tower for a week.”

“Someone just find him please,” Steve said, rubbing the bridge of his nose as he started walking to the street Clint had been on, there were still people there cleaning up, no one was panicking or seemed to think anything was wrong. Steve kept going asking a few of them if they’d seen him, and he found he was in the right area, but there was no sign of him.

Tony landed the suit a few feet away from him, “Nothing. His tracker isn’t being picked up either. We should look for whatever it is he found and we might have a better chance of finding him.” Steve nodded, agreeing that would be a good place to start too, as he wasn’t getting anywhere.

Tony scanned the area, trying to pick up anything that wasn’t supposed to be there, there was an area in an alley that had a shit ton of the stupid things that was giving off the most electrical signals, but they were all dead still, none of them moving, there was a man with a shovel working away at the front of the pile.

“Hey, have you seen Hawkeye, the Avenger?” Tony asked and the man looked up at them grinning widely at the sight of Iron Man and Captain America.

“O-oh! I- oh goodness, you’re both- I mean no, I haven’t, well I did earlier, he let me shake his hand! But I have not seen him since, he was walking that way, I think,” the man pointed down the street, Tony and Steve nodded, not giving him much thought beyond that as they started in that direction.

They looked the whole day, but he was gone, there was nothing anywhere. No sign of him.

It wasn’t until late in the evening they found his bow, on a roof several blocks from the site of the attack, and his quiver on the complete opposite side. It was not reassuring.


	2. Chapter 2

A community of packs was vital to a thriving society, many thought a simple pack would be enough, but having more support was never anything to sneeze at, they tended to be just the thing that prevented a pack from seriously tearing each other apart. When a member of a pack could go to another pack for a short reprieve after a fight or disagreement or something upsetting, it tended to help, sometimes it made things worse, but it was usually a good thing for any pack. However it was only good when that member was welcome and accepted into the both packs.

Clint was a part of the pack, he was Natasha’s best friend, he was Tony’s explosion ally in the lab, he was Bruce’s cooking and food shopping buddy, he and Thor had video game tournaments, and he and Steve would spar and sometimes doodle together. They all had a connection with him and losing him made them all lack something they had gotten used to over the year or so they’d been a pack.

So when Fury started sending ‘temporary’ replacements a week in, it ruined every chance of them being accepted into the pack, even later on, when Clint was back. One came in handy during a recent battle but they otherwise had no use for another sniper. They were going to find Clint, they’d been searching for weeks, they would not give up regardless of having no leads so far.

And with Clint’s absence the team’s dynamics were not in the least bit helped by their worry for their missing packmate, both Steve and Tony blamed themselves for Clint’s disappearance, but it was clear it was not anyone's fault but his captors. He had been there one moment and then gone the next, all they could do was just not stop looking. And thus it caused the two alphas to go at each other every time they were in the same room. Natasha was somewhat more reclusive than usual and Bruce didn’t enjoy cooking as much as he used to. Thor didn’t even touch the video games. 

Thor, being that he understood pack dynamics only theoretically, did all he could to help the others search but there was little more he could do but support them as best as he could, which was not by much, he just didn’t understand the concept of a pack, save that it was much like a family, or was a family, a chosen family. He was glad to be apart of it, but he didn’t have the calming hormones a Beta had, so he wasn’t much help at all in that department. He did go find his Lady Jane, however, to get away from the down atmosphere of the Tower and because she was also worried about Clint, being a pack member by default, since she was with Thor, she also put in some effort just checking to make sure no magic portals were open around the time of the battle or after. Thor felt he could do little more than his teammates save hope for Clint’s safe return. 

Bruce, being the team’s Omega made sure everyone ate something at least twice a day, they were all very forgetful about it, including himself right then, he did what he could in the lab but he was a chemist and a radiology expert, nothing he could do would be much help, he did help Tony when asked. Otherwise he made sure the rest of the pack stayed as well as they could with a member missing. It was hard, and he knew Hulk was hurting for it. This was the first pack that Hulk had ever been apart of and he didn’t want it breaking. Bruce did his best to keep that from happening, keeping the hope alive that Clint was going to be found, and okay.

Natasha was hard to read, no one could, no one except Clint. She was straight faced and emotionless during every encounter these days, she had lost her only pack member that she could really remember having. They had been lone wolves for the longest time, just the two of them, they had been fine, a Switch and a Neutral it wasn’t a totally unorthodox pairing, some people got away with having small packs and being just fine, especially in their line of work. She and Clint had been like that, until New York, Tony had dragged everyone to the Tower and suddenly it was a real pack, with one of each and then some, Clint managed to fit right in. He was flexible, he knew how to be friends with anyone. Natasha, she was a lot more withdrawn, but she had come to connect with the others in small ways which made being in a pack really not as bad as she’d thought, but still Clint was her mostly platonic mate.   
Losing him would hurt more than she would ever want to admit, and that meant she was going to find him. No matter what actions she must take. Clint would be safe.

Steve blamed himself because he was the battle leader, not pack leader, that was still to be decided between him and Tony, but he was the one with the tactical mind and game plan, he called the shots when they were on the field, and he hadn’t even considered that there had been more to it, and his mistake had cost the pack Clint.

Steve had taken a long time to get used to a whole new pack so suddenly, for the world it had been 70 years, for him, it had been days, when he’d first woken up, he’d had a pack, all of the commandos, Bucky, Peggy, he’d been completely lost knowing they had all moved on, with the exception of Bucky, who Steve still hurt thinking about. He’d lost one packmate already, he wasn’t losing another one, and he did everything he could to help find him.

Tony was always in his lab, looking for any sign of Clint, he still felt responsible, because he’d been the last person to talk to him, and he knew that made no sense, but it was how he felt. He set up as many different types of tracking devices and detectors and frequency finders he could think of, he even had Bruce look for odd radiation signals. He would do anything to get one of his packmates back, he hadn’t felt this close to anyone in a very long time, since he’d had Pepper, Rhodey and Happy as his impromptu corporation pack. He wasn’t going to fail this one too.

He had a whole area of his lab dedicated to finding Clint, but good lord whoever had taken him had been good, and they knew how to fuck with his head, which was really not something you wanted to do to Tony Stark.

It had taken weeks, but finally one of his tracking devices started beeping. Tony had been asleep on one of his lab tables and jerked awake in surprise, he looked around in confusion for a moment before his mind caught up and he was scrambling over to his corner, he looked at the screens set up and his eyes widened, “JARVIS, alert the others, I have something.”

“Right away, Sir,” the AI replied, even as Tony was donning his armor and heading towards the landing pad.

“Tony? What did you find?” Steve’s voice asked through his comms, he was moving fast too from the sounds of it.

“One of Clint’s trackers was set off and it’s nearby,” Tony replied.

“Where is it?” Steve asked and Tony could see the Captain running below the just as he jumped off the roof of Tower, Steve could run fast after all.

“At the bottom of the Hudson,” Tony said and then put on his repulsors as fast as he could to get to the Hudson as fast as possible.

He didn’t wait, he flew straight into the water and down to where the tracker was indicated on his HUD, the water was disgusting, and Tony worried that if Clint really was in it, he might get sick.

He propelled deeper into the water until he saw a tiny red flashing light and he grabbed it, then lifted it to the surface, he was up and out, he could spot Steve over on one of the docks, Tony dropped it next to him.

“His vest…” Steve muttered, wiping off some of the seaweed covering the Avengers A on the chest.

“They’re just fucking with us now,” Tony growled, “We have to get him back.”

“We will,” Steve said, but he didn’t know how either. He carried the vest back to the Tower while Tony was up and flying back, frustrated and angry at the lack of their pack member. And at the assholes who had taken him, they were going to tear them limb from limb.

 

Steve wasn’t doing much better in the long run, frustrated and upset, but he had no way of looking for Clint except the old fashioned way. He took as many missions possible that seemed like they could possibly lead to Clint, most of the chances were very slim and never mounted to much. He also used some of the information that Tony unearthed from all of his snooping to take out a few baddies before they had a chance to get dangerous. But that was more of a distraction from reality than a chance to help look for Cint, Steve would do more if he could. He wished desperately that there was something, but big muscles didn’t do much against the unknown.

 

Natasha however seemed to get the closest, she combined both Steve and Tony’s methods into her own, each time she went on the hunt out to search for her lost best friend through searches and communications of her owns means she would seem to get close and that was when a new article of his clothing showed up in a random location, but it was still never enough to actually find him.

They spent weeks searching only to turn up with nothing. Not even an inch closer than they had been before. For all they knew, he wasn’t in New York at all, or even the US.

They wouldn’t give up on him. Clint was pack, and they would never give up on pack.

 

~

 

The world was fuzzy. It had been fuzzy for ages, he wasn’t all there. It was like being at the dentist and on the anesthesia, you could take in everything, but none of it really made sense in your head at first. And that was incredibly frustrating. Clint had been taken somewhere, he remembered that clearly, and then strapped to a medical bed and hooked up to IVs, snarling and thrashing the whole time, he was not going to willingly let himself be used for experiments, but eventually he’d been knocked out, he’d woken up again with a sore side, he had a fear that they’d removed his Neutralizer but had no way to really know.

And then his system had been flushed of everything for a full two days which just seemed to put more to the theory he no longer had birth control. No one was around that whole time, just him and machines pumping him full of saline, then there had been a change in the sounds and feel of what entered the IVs and then the world turned to fuzz. Incoherent and like he was in a daze, like the whole world was a dream. He couldn’t remember much of anything for however long he’d been here after that.

 

He had been coherent for some things like further tests, like they needed him on less drugs, but still very fuzzy, he figured they didn’t want him awake enough to manage to get away, and right then, he was more awake than he had been yet and now because he could feel himself again instead of the numbness he’d grown used to, he knew exactly why they’d wanted to make him easier to deal with. They’d been pumping him full of hormones, Omega hormones to be exact and now he was about to go into heat. Which meant he was going to be out of his mind with desire anyway. And here he was in the presence of people he didn’t know doing something he didn’t want to and still completely out of his own control. He was terrified, and he hoped the others were coming to get him, and soon.

 

He wanted nothing to do with what they were planning, he thought perhaps humiliation? Make him appear as a weak link in the avengers? But he already was that so it hardly needed pointing out, maybe they just wanted a high profile experiment? He didn’t know or care. He just wanted it to stop, desperately.

 

“Wh-what are you-? What are you doing to me?” he demanded weakly, when he saw someone in a white coat come in, they didn’t even acknowledge him, only turned to another white coat next to  computer terminal.

 

“-doing well, vitals are normal, hormone levels stable, should remain that way throughout heat,” they said and Clint tried to yank on his restraints but he was so weak he barely made them rattle, and god he was so hot already, this was not good.

 

“Good, both Alphas will be within custody shortly, prepare him to be moved,” the other coat said and Clint demanded for answers again but was once again ignored. He was given something in another IV, of which he did not know, but could figure out the side effects as he started blacking out, which was even more frustrating, he was getting really sick of this and he was going to make them pay, he promised he would, just as it made him go under.

 

He woke up again, this time on a bed, and completely nude, he was also completely free to move around, but naturally he was also in full blown heat and standing up in his condition would not end well. An omega who was used to it, might be able to manage to stand, that said nothing of actually getting away, but as a Beta who had never been through a heat before, he knew he was fucked. Probably in both meanings of the word.

 

He tried regardless because he was a stubborn bastard, between bouts of overwhelming need and his ass leaking like a faucet he got his body to move, but only made it to about two feet away from the bed when the door opened again, this time someone else was shoved in the room, and from their scent Clint could tell they were an Alpha in full blown rut, no doubt an artificial one, but it didn’t matter to him, or his hormones anyway, he felt his body shiver in delight and could feel himself already opening up to the idea of getting fucked by a strong, proud alpha, his head fuzzy with the desire. He was already fading out when the Alpha turned to him. Eyes shimmering- blue familiar eyes shimmering in desire. Clint was able to gasp one word before he was overcome with the desire and need.

 

“S-Steve!”

 

~

 

They had timed things precisely. It was a time sensitive operation after all.

Steve Rogers went on a morning run at 6:35 AM every morning, going several circuits around Central park for two hours. Then at 8:45 AM he went to a cafe and had a small breakfast and drew for half an hour before heading back to Avengers Tower at 9:20 AM not to be seen again unless spontaneously throughout the day for errands. The morning was the best time to strike.

 

Steve left that morning at the same time as always, somewhat aggravated as he and Tony had butted heads once more before the other Alpha left to go take care of some Stark Industries things. Steve didn’t think he should go so far, not when they had a missing pack member, but Tony was insistent that nothing would happen to him and that no one else could take care of this business, not even Pepper. So he’d left, stomping away angry and indignant. And Steve had left angry and frustrated.

 

Steve was concerned that someone was trying to hurt them somehow, and that there was nothing saying that whoever had taken Clint might not come try and take another one of them. But it was a small fear, as nothing had happened to any of them the past few weeks, and there had been a few small skirmishes since then and opportunities to take them. So he wasn’t so paranoid as to change his own routine, foley on his part. He never thought that they would get one of them in broad daylight.

 

Of course he hadn’t assumed he would be the one taken either.

 

He’d been on his first circuit around the park when he felt something sting his neck, he gasped and fell to the ground as the sudden feeling of cold washed over his body, it was fast acting and strong, strong enough to counter his fast metabolism. Reaching around he pulled it out, taking it in hand and looking at it before his vision dimmed too much; the dart from his neck was almost exactly what he would expect, “What the....shit,” he gasped, forcing himself to stand once more, reaching his hand into his pocket to grab at his phone to alert the other Avengers. He didn’t make it all the way up to his feet as he was hit by another dart in the shoulder and he crashed to the ground as all feeling escaped in another icy cold shower, his finger dug into the buttons of his phone anyway, he could hear JARVIS talking as he started to lose consciousness. Convinced the team would get to him in time.

 

“Captain? Captain I must inform you that it has come to my attention that Mr. Stark never arrived…”

 

He was out before he heard the rest and was not aware of the people moving to pick him up and taking him elsewhere, dressed as EMTs, putting him in a Ambulance, no one would suspect anything was wrong. He was out of the park, already being prepared for the next step of the operation and out of anyone’s mind before any of the other Avengers managed to get the alert.

 

When Steve woke again, he was burning with desire, mind so far gone into rut he could think of nothing more than finding an omega and mating, there were some Betas around directing him towards a hall, and then he could smell it, someone was in heat. He found the room, the door was open and he was in. They smelled delicious.

 

“S-Steve!” they gasped and Steve was there, seconds later, grabbing the omega who was gasping now, bucking up in his hands, hands clawing at him and pleas escaping his lips. Steve’s instincts could take no more, and he let go, letting nature take over. Needing to mate, to reproduce.

 

Doing exactly what their captors had intended.

 

~

 

In the back of his mind Clint knew this shouldn’t be happening, that Steve was being manipulated just like he was, but he was too caught up in the sensations and overwhelming urge of heat to say anything other than pleas for more. He had no idea what their captors wanted from them, making them have sex wasn’t humiliating, it was natural. And after more time in the pack it may have happened on its’ own. So he didn’t understand why. He couldn’t think on it much even as he tried to keep his mind focused he couldn’t, he was still too far gone to think straight beyond how much he wanted Steve’s knot buried in his ass.

 

It was in between bouts when their captors came back in, Clint had no idea why, he knew the heat would last at least a week and Steve had only been with him for maybe a day and a half, maybe they just wanted to torture him? That seemed to be the case when Steve started growling at the white coats, using his body to shield Clint. They didn’t seem to care at all, they only stuck him with a needle and he collapsed on top of Clint who was really not okay with them hurting his alpha. He snarled too, trying to prevent them from taking him away, but he was pinned down and couldn’t do anything even as he thrashed and attempted to scratch their eyes out trying to get back to him. Steve was still taken away and Clint could do nothing, he was still in heat and utterly helpless.

 

He was attempting to get to the door again after he was released, trying to get to Steve only for it to open once more, and another Alpha in rut was shoved in.

 

This time it was Tony.

 

Clint was seriously starting to wonder what the fuck they were trying to do here. Because switching Alphas in the middle of heat was definitely not a good idea, especially when Tony could smell Steve on him and didn’t seem to like that one bit. Tony wasn’t rough with him, he obviously was of mind enough to not do that, but he was very thorough, covering Clint in his scent, and Clint sorta started to wonder if maybe this wasn’t about him at all.

 

They were trying to get Steve and Tony to kill each other over this? But that was just stupid, Clint had no other ideas, and his brain wasn’t cooperating, he had an alpha against him again and his body was happy.

 

Once again nature took over and Clint couldn’t think anymore.

 

It was confusing now, every day or so, they would switch between Alphas, Steve, Tony, Steve, Tony, they were both so far in rut they got more and more aggressive, smelling another alpha on their omega, they were more and more possessive, trying to let the other one know Clint belonged to them.

 

By the end of the week, Clint was utterly exhausted and couldn’t stay awake covered in hickies and bite marks, it wasn’t really clear who had won, but Clint didn’t care he had more important things to worry about he wanted to tell Steve or Tony something, make sure they knew what was going on, but after he fell asleep on the last day of his heat, he didn’t wake to either of them again, he was back on a medical bed and hooked up to more IVs, and the world once again went fuzzy.

 

~

 

After Steve and Tony went missing SHIELD and the rest of the Avengers went crazy looking for them, as they’d disappeared without a trace as well, Tony had no tech on him, which was terrifying since the man breathed it. And Steve was gone with what looked like no struggle, which was just as scary considering how strong he was.

What was even more worrisome was their sudden and unseen return. They both appeared on the radar at exactly the same time, but in two different places. They tried triangulating a location from that to find Clint, but again, there were too many places and not enough evidence.

 

Neither of them could remember what had really happened, just that they had gone into rut, and that they remembered smelling each other and Clint in heat, which was enough to know he was alive and that things were being done to make him omega, and that it had been orchestrated by the same person. Or same group, but they still had no idea as to what was actually going on.

 

But they were both subdued, they felt terrible, having done what they did to Clint, it was natural yes, something that happened in close knit packs, but they hadn’t talked to him about it, and he had been in heat so had no way to say no.

Natasha knew her friend well enough to know he wouldn’t blame them, Clint was pretty open about sex, and he likely wouldn’t think they were awful for falling to their instincts, they just had to find him first so he could tell them himself. And she hoped it was soon, she didn’t think she could handle Steve’s guilty puppy face and Tony’s guilty mass arrow making project for much longer. They were pathetic, even if it was a little endearing, a little.

But she knew finding Clint was now more important than ever, after heat and being given to two alphas to mate with?

If what she guessed was the truth and they were using Clint as a human incubator, they had to find him. And fast. A child of Tony or Steve in the hands of people who would do them wrong was not a good thing, and she couldn’t believe Clint was caught up in the middle of it. How did he manage to get into so much trouble?

 

After Tony and Steve’s return they were approached by SHIELD, but not Maria or Fury, some other departments demanding knowledge of what was going on. Steve and Tony refused to share anything with anyone they didn’t know, it was incredibly suspicious to have people randomly come demanding answers. Even Natasha, who had once been loyal to SHIELD but was now loyal to her pack didn’t want to divulge anything.

Fury himself had assigned them both to the Avengers Initiative permanently, and when asked about the demands. Fury said he’d not been the one to make those demands, but the World Security Council.

He was happy to leave a missing Avenger in their packs hands, he knew how that worked, packs cared for their own, he did swear he was doing all he could to help and find him, they had little more luck than Tony had. They weren’t much help anyway. So sharing everything would likely not help much.

The Avengers were a pack and they looked out for each other, Fury accepted that fact but swore he would be behind them if they needed him for this.

Natasha appreciated the gesture, they would find Clint and they would help him through this, that was what they were for.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, updates come Friday, no sooner. Just throwing that out there.
> 
> Also things get REALLY angsty for Clint in this chapter, forewarning for that.

Clint was so out of it, but aware, he was feeling so not with it, like there was something off, and more than just the drugs, like there was something wrong with him, the fuzzy thing was still there but it was a lot fainter now, he could hear the white coats talking, and he could hear that it was about him.

 

Something about ‘coming along’, and ‘first term’, and his vitals were good and yadda yadda yadda, he didn’t care he wanted out, he wanted to know what the fuck was going on, his brain was so messed up from all the lapses in consciousness, he just couldn’t comprehend anything.

 

This was worse than what Loki had done to him, he was always on the brink of a panic attack but he never could because the drugs they were keeping him on kept him calm and unable to really move quickly, not that he could move much at all because of the restraints.

 

It wasn’t until a small break in the drugs that he started to realize what was going on, he could see the small bump that was his abdomen, and he could feel how off kilter his body was, and really, he’d just gone through several marathon rounds of sex with two alphas while in heat. It was only logical as to what the hell was going on.

 

And he was _not_ happy about it.

 

“N-no…” he moaned, “No...get...out…” he tugged at the restraints, “No! Get it out!” he cried, “I don’t want it! GET IT OUT!”

 

He tried clawing at his belly, but couldn’t reach due to the straps on his wrists, but he twisted and yelled, actually managing to get one of the IVs out which alerted the doctors to his distress and many of them rushed in, some pinned him down so they could get a new IV in all the while he demanded they take it out, he never wanted one. It wasn’t right, they were making the wrong thing happen, they were wrong, he wasn’t right! They needed to stop! But nothing was done the way he wanted and soon enough he was under once more.

 

~

 

It had taken months, Natasha was positively furious at this point, her best friend should not be lost for this long, he needed to be home, and he needed to be there now.   
Sassing them from the countertop as they gathered for a meal, shooting perfect scores on the range games every single time. Coming up from Tony’s lab with a soot covered and beaming face, beating Thor at every racing game and losing at all of the fighting games, leaving doodles of a cartoon Captain America on Steve’s plate before dinner. Laughing at all of the dumb jokes Tony told, grinning at Steve whenever he seemed to need the boost. Getting soft chuckles from Bruce for his food puns, telling Thor some of his more comedic missions and getting the god roaring with laughter. No one was laughing now. He was missing from them and it was such a big hole, it was almost like they were starting to forget and that was why they needed him back.

 

But it had taken them ages and so much research and cross referencing and so many different variables to find the people responsible it almost seemed like too much of a dream come true for it to be real.

 

Tony and Steve’s memories weren’t much help as their kidnappers had been very careful when they were taken, both Steve and Tony only remembered the last places they’d been the days they’d been kidnapped; Central Park and the landing strip to his private plane respectively, so that was a dead end.

However from what they’d deduced, making sure a baby was healthy while in the womb took some serious medical costs and doctors and equipment, but they had to have equipment sent to them somehow and of course if they were expecting to have infants in the same place, at some point, they needed to get their post birth medical equipment to them too. And the tracking of that on top of triangulating all of the drop locations of Steve, Tony and Clint’s clothes they were able to find only a few spots it could be, and two of them were empty the other three were being used for other things and didn’t have room for a secret underground lab but the sixth was the ticket and the front for a baby robot manufacturer, and that was how they had found them. Nanny robots were not a common thing, almost no one had one, so it was not a thriving business and yet people came in and out of the plant every day and that was how Natasha managed to go undercover and be able to find a way to Clint. It was still too long for her tastes, but they couldn’t risk them hurting him or taking him elsewhere if they attacked up front.

 

She had gotten in and used every sliver of information she was able to find to figure out what was going on, they couldn’t just storm the place and take him back, no matter how much the others wanted to.

 

It would take precision and deception, Natasha was the one for the job, she had disguised herself, died her hair blonde and used some prosthetics to change her face slightly in a few places to make herself unrecognizable then made herself into an unassuming Omega, hoping to get closer to Clint that way, she was getting there, closer and closer nearly every day, she had even seen him once.

What she had seen had not made her happy what so ever, however, and only more desperate to save him.

 

He had been strapped down to a medical bed, tubes with what she knew to be nutrients and fluids and hormones and a sedative stuck in his arms. His eyes were closed, but they flickered from time to time, he was still there, but not really. He looked pale, and his eyes had bags under them, but the biggest change was the smallest of bumps in his abdomen. He was most definitely pregnant.

 

She hated that she was right. That they had to take Clint for this, of all people, to save him from it, she would wish it on another. But now she had to save him, and she knew it was going to be hard. He had been in their care for four months at the most, and that was far too long.

 

She had been here long enough to have a basic idea as to what their final outcome was. She knew now that they were a group that was an offshoot of Hydra, trying to create perfect super soldiers, and instead of just using Steve’s blood, they were going to use his offspring to spark it, but they threw in Tony because he was a genius, so put them together and you’d have a genius supersoldier. She knew Clint had not been the first choice, they had been prepared to use Hulk, as it was believed Clint was just a Beta, but the damn bugs had scanned him during the fight and discovered he was a Switch and so they had changed at the last second. Hulk would have been impossible to contain anyway, why they’d considered him in the first place was beyond her.

 

But Clint, he was so human, he was the perfect ‘base’ to grow from, not only was he also unparalleled with his aim he was a good tactician, like Steve, and they often collaborated on strategies. He was also not an idiot like he led people to believe, he was very intelligent and matching that up with Tony was a little frightening. They really couldn’t have picked a better control subject. Natasha just wished they’d gone with the Hulk, this would already be over by now.

 

She let out a soft breath, she would get him out, and then help him with anything she could, she knew he would need support of her and the pack after this, it would tear him to pieces. She knew, because suddenly being a mother would not be something he would take too well.

 

But first things first, she had to get him out. They had a plan. Tony had created a virus that Natasha had on a flash drive, at exactly 12:15pm when the doctor left Clint alone after changing his IVs the same time every day, she was going to set the virus loose, then she was going to go to the door on the south side and let in Bruce and Tony who were then going to go and let in Steve and Thor, all the while the place was going to be panicking from the virus, Natasha knew they would immediately go to protect Clint, as was protocol, and that was where she came in. She would go in and pretend to be in distress send the guards out to fight and Steve and Thor would take care of them, Tony and Bruce would meanwhile be taking information from their servers and backing up all the data, then once that was all done, Bruce would Hulk out and tear the place apart while the rest of them would take Clint to safety.

 

It wasn’t solid because it likely wouldn’t go to plan, but as long as they got Clint out, Natasha really didn’t care.

 

Step one was in place, the virus was in the system and she was already heading over to open the door, except the alarm started going off early, and it shouldn’t be going off already, dammit, that narrowed their time window considerably. She hurried along, needing to make it to the door in haste. Unfortunately there were some people around it, dammit.

 

“What’s going on?” she demanded, because she had gotten a promotion awhile back, she was going to use it, even if she was a fake employee.

 

“The base has been compromised, SHIELD has been seen nearby,” the guard replied. That actually surprised her.

 

“Shit,” she hissed, “How the hell did they-” she took a deep breath, they could use it, “You need to go reinforce the main entry points, we can’t let them in until everything has been secured,” she instructed, they only paused a moment before nodding and turning to go, she grabbed the last man, he was fairly bulky, about Steve’s size, “You come with me,” she said, and then turned around and led him to a storage area, then knocked him out and took his uniform. She went to the door and was relieved to find Tony and Bruce, she ushered them in. “Hurry,” she insisted, “SHIELD is here.”

 

“What? How? We didn’t tell them anything,” Tony said, “Aside from the whole going missing thing.”

 

“They’re SHIELD, they likely know everything that we do,” Natasha replied, “The WSC does at least. They don’t trust us.”

 

“Well they can fuck right off, Clint is in our pack now,” Tony grumbled, “We’re gonna be the ones who rescue him.”

 

“Right and now we need to change things up,” Natasha said, “Find some white coats, try to blend in-” she glared at Tony, “Blend. In.”

 

“Alright,” Tony said holding his hands up, “Bruce give me your glasses,” he said, “I’m kind of recognizable.”

 

“This is going to end badly,” Bruce sighed but slipped his glasses off and gave them to Tony. Who looked a little ridiculous with them on, but whatever worked.

 

“I don’t care as long as it ends with Clint home,” Natasha said, “Now let’s go let in Steve and Thor.”

 

Luckily that wasn’t hard either, Natasha then pulled Steve aside and had him put on the uniform, he had to give his shield to Thor because that was even more recognizable in this crowd, she sent the others off to finish the plan, and then she kept Steve with her, issuing orders to anyone who looked like they had nothing to do on the way there. They made it to the area that Clint was being held. Naturally the doctors were already there preparing for a move. Natasha looked at Steve then told him to stay.

 

“They’ll recognize you and it’ll let them know too soon, just wait,” she said and Steve agreed, albeit reluctantly.

 

She stepped into the room everyone was still busy so didn’t really notice another body, she stepped to one of the lead doctors, “Sir, I heard there was need for an omega? If he is to be moved he would need to be kept close to one for reassurance.”

 

The doctor looked at her, pausing, “Oh...yes, yes, I did call for one,” it was pretty clear he hadn’t but it was a good idea and he’d want to take credit, “Yes, good, you will do, stay near.”

 

She nodded and did, watching them as they moved around Clint who was still out of it, she just had to wait.

 

“Sir!” a guard at the door said, “SHIELD has breached the perimeter!”

 

The head doctor frowned, “We need to move, now, forget anything that is not vital, we can not lose this, after we have come so far.”

 

“Sir,” the others agreed, Natasha included because she had to stay in character, but she was very tempted to just kill them all and take Clint and get out, but she had to stay, they just need to get him out of the room and then they could go and hopefully get him out before SHIELD got here, who Natasha knew would take Clint in for Medical purposes and that was something they couldn’t stop as his medical was through SHIELD. Despite how much Clint would hate it. They just had to be fast.

 

She was next to Clint when they moved, her hand on his as they started down the hall, she saw Steve start shadowing them half way and knew that it was getting very close.

 

“Sir!” another guard shouted, running around the corner looking panicked, “The Avengers! They are here! The Hulk has been unleashed! The building-” just then the building gave an ominous shake. The building was going to come down.

 

“Move out!” the head doctor snapped and everyone started moving faster, Natasha stayed with Clint then glanced at Steve, he looked back at her and nodded, she nodded back and right as they turned a corner he moved taking out a few guards by hand he was very good at hand to hand, but he always prefered to have his shield, luckily only a few moment later there was a familiar thump and a clang and Thor’s hammer came out of no where, shortly followed by Steve’s shield, it may have been flying a bit wobbly a Thor couldn’t throw it as well as Steve could, Steve still caught it and was able to smack some of the other guards in the face while Natasha hung back as they tried to go a different direction, once they were around another corner, Natasha used the bed to pull herself up and then to swing around and kick a few people in the face. Then she was using some Widow Stings to take out most of the doctors.

 

She was turning to the head doctor now who was spluttering and trying to pull out a gun, she kicked it out of his hands before it was even up.

 

“Y-you!” he gasped, and Natasha pulled out her one use Widow Bites.

 

“You picked with the wrong pack to mess with,” she said just as he dropped writhing on the floor, she turned back to Clint now who was still totally out on the bed. She cupped his cheek, “I’m sorry it took so long,” she said softly, then looked up when Steve turned around the corner, shield in hand once more.

 

“It looks like SHIELD is here, they’re already gathering up all of the workers,” he said and Natasha frowned but nodded.

 

“I guess they’ll be the quickest route out of here, we won’t be able to get to our jet,” she admitted, “I didn’t want to,” she stopped she didn’t want Steve to worry, “...I know Clint hates medical...but we really have no choice with this,” she said gesturing at his belly, Steve swallowed.

 

“So...he really is...pregnant,” he muttered and Natasha put a hand on his arm, “I was hoping…”

 

“I know Steve, none of you are ready to be parents, but let’s not worry about it now, let’s just bring him home,” she said and Steve nodded, they started rolling Clint away now, the hormones and the sedative still in place to make it easier to get him home, they were met by SHIELD medics halfway to the exit, they started talking about fluids and food and other normal things, but Natasha was not letting him out of her sight.

 

She went with them into the quinjet and watched as they hooked him up to more saline and some other bags that were nutrients, Natasha kept Clint’s hand in hers the whole time, she grabbed one of the comms and set it to the Avengers’ channel and was able to hear them talking, they were in their own quinjet following behind the SHIELD one, they were all worried, and Tony and Bruce were both concerned about SHIELD getting involved so suddenly.

 

As was Natasha for that matter, it wasn’t that she was ungrateful for the help, but Fury had even said they would leave this to them, as it was a pack matter for the most part and it had yet to endanger anyone else, that they were aware of at least, so it was up to them to get back one of their own. So why SHIELD was now involved was somewhat...worrisome. Natasha would bet the WSC had a lot to do with it.

 

That was part of the reason why Natasha didn’t want Clint alone, the other part was that he would need a familiar face to wake up to, hers would be the best.

 

They arrived at SHIELD in short order, wheeling Clint to a medical room and started detaching the sedative, they couldn’t just put saline in to clear out his blood stream unfortunately due to the hormones, so he would have to wake up after his body diluted it naturally. He was no longer restrained and had SHIELD hormones this time, with saline and nutrients. They got him set up, and did nothing more for then, leaving him be with the team.

 

Natasha left his side only after the others had arrived, she went and took off the makeup and prosthetics, her hair would have to be dyed back later, but for now, she just wanted to be near.

He was going to need it.

 

~

 

Clint’s eyes fluttered opened a few times before he finally could see the ceiling, it took his brain a long moment to recognize it as the SHIELD medbay. It took even longer for him to realize he wasn’t fuzzy anymore, he could actually think. He actually knew what was happening right then.

 

And he could clearly remember the last time he had been aware, he looked down at his belly and started panicking again, his hands free to reach for it and start clawing at it. He didn’t get far, only a few red scratches before Natasha grabbed his hands.

 

“Shh, it’s okay, you’re okay, calm down, Clint you’re safe,” she said gently, but he tugged his hands away.

 

“N-nooo, I don’t want it! Get it out! It’s not right!” he cried, he hadn’t noticed the sudden tears rolling down his cheeks and his breaths coming in too fast, he was too focused on his panic, he couldn’t let this be, it would be so wrong, so bad, he would be so wrong and so bad, he just wanted it gone.

 

“Clint, hey, it’s going to be okay, you just need to calm down,” Natasha said, squeezing his wrists hard, “Just take a deep breath.”

 

He could hear her words, but they weren’t computing, his panic wouldn’t have it, he was too frantic, and too out of it despite no longer being drugged, he did not want to be a mother. He didn’t deserve that. He would ruin the very meaning of motherhood. He was not ever meant to be a parent. They had to stop.

 

“No!” he cried again, “Just get it out!” he demanded, jerking in the bed and trying to throw himself out, do anything to just get it gone. Sobbing and crying out, tugging to get his arms released.

 

He was too far gone to hear Natasha calling for someone, a moment later there were others holding him down and then there was a prick in his arm and he was fading again, crying out in despair. Why?

 

~

 

Natasha took in a deep breath and had to control herself, she hated seeing Clint like this, and was also utterly relieved neither Tony nor Steve were in the room at the time. She couldn’t imagine how it would affect them to see that, see the omega carrying one of their young reacting like that.

 

However, Natasha knew how Clint felt about kids. He adored them, just as long as he was not responsible for them. As long as he never had to be near them, as long as they were safe from him and he wouldn’t taint them. He had convinced himself long ago that he was not worthy of being a parent, that he would ruin any child he had, he had gotten to the point where he didn’t even like being around kids, afraid he would hurt them somehow. She wished she could hurt the people who had made him think these things, but they were already long dead, so instead she would have to help him realize he was wrong. Because she didn’t think this baby was going anywhere.

 

~

 

Clint woke up again, and this time he couldn’t move. Restrained, again. And that was not how he wanted to be in a place he was supposed to trust, they had him tied down in the damn lab. And now here, he would have gone on full freak mode if Bruce’s face hadn’t popped over his a second later.

 

“Hey,” he said staying calm, “It’s okay, we had to tie you down,” he said looking apologetic, “You were hurting yourself-”

“I don’t want this-” he gasped out and Bruce squeezed one of his hands moving his own up Clint’s arm and to his shoulder, repeating the action, soothing.

“I know, I know, I’m so sorry...but we can’t give you an abortion, we would if we could. But we can’t because you’ve been laying down the whole time, it could potentially hurt you very badly,” he said gently, “We are sorry...but you’ll have to carry the baby to term.”

Clint did not want that and was about to say how much that was fucked up and unfair and fuck his body, but Bruce was good at reading him at the moment apparently.

“You don’t have to keep it, you can give it up, or just leave the decision up to Tony or Steve,” he said, and Clint frowned then recalled the bits and pieces of his heat, Tony and Steve had both been there. Oh. Right.

His jaw clenched and his fingers balled into fists, it looked like he would have no say in the matter at all, no control.

“Fine,” he hissed, “I don’t care. Just- I want to be alone.”

Bruce sighed and pat his arm then moved and left the room, Clint really hated his life and had to will himself not to cry again, but failed.

Goddamn hormones.

 

~

 

_They were everywhere, crawling all over him tiny mechanical feet skittering all over his skin, his whole body shivered at the irritation. It was bad at first but more and more came and they covered his body, and held him down, dragging him down, down and away from help. Thousands of bugs crawling all over his body keeping him immobilized crawling in his mouth his nose and his eyes, muffling him, preventing him from seeing, hearing, breathing, no, he was going to be sick no, he didn’t want to be here. NO!_

_The bugs dragged him down and he dropped, he found himself some place familiar, a sniper's nest, holding his bow, firm in his hands, it was a comfort, reassuring. He was gazing out across a busy market square, people coming and going._

_He was on a mission, there was a bomb threat in this area, to try and kill as many people as possible, the bombs used previously were triggered by the bomber, so Clint simply has to shoot the bomber before they could press the trigger._

_His eyes are peeled to find anyone out of place stopping in the middle of the square which would have the most casualties. He had to take the shooter out while in broad daylight in a group of people._

_“Hawkeye, update.”_

_“Nothing yet,” he replied, “I don’t know if they- wait…”_

_His eyebrows furrowed and he looked closely, someone was moving towards the center of the square, slowly but surely, he couldn’t see them through the crowd, not until they made it closer to the center where it was less clustered but still heavily populated._

_“Shit,” he hissed, “Eyes on the bomber…” he muttered._

_“Permission to shoot.”_

_Clint clenched his teeth and hoped he was wrong, but he couldn’t be, all of the signs were there, he waited, maybe he was mistaken maybe it was just a coincidence?_

_“Hawkeye?”_

_“I got it, I got it,” he said and then swore under his breath, but he drew back his bow. And then released._

_The little girl standing in the center of the square dropped, the trigger to the bomb in her backpack dropping from her hand as it too fell to the ground, luckily not exploding at impact. Her eyes stared up at him, straight at him from her dead body, she couldn’t have been more than six years old._

_An arrow protruded from her chest._

 

Clint woke up with a gasp and then turned over and puked over the edge of the bed, unable to stop until there was nothing left, which was not much to begin with, he dry heaved until he was too exhausted to even move. It was good his hands had finally been released otherwise he would have puked stomach acid all over himself.

He was shaking from the effort and trying once again not to cry, jesus why was that his go to reaction to everything? Before this, he never cried, he’d been called heartless and soulless more than once. And now he cried if he dropped his spoon.

But that dream...it was a mission he’d been on years ago, he’d had to make the call and he’d been sick to do it, but he had, and it turned out to be the right call, after the screams of the citizens nearby had gotten him to leave his perch and head back to his extraction point, he heard the other agents saying how the backpack had been loaded with enough explosives to send the whole square sky high. He’d had to do it to save hundreds of people.

Still years later the image of her eyes was burned into his memory and always made him feel sick, and cemented the fact that he did not deserve to have kids and never would.

He gasped a bit, trying to reign in his emotions, and didn’t expect there to be a sudden touch of cool wetness touching his forehead and wiping his mouth, he jumped in surprise.

“Sorry…” Steve whispered, “You were sweating and crying out,” he was holding a wet cloth to Clint’s head, he looked concerned and worried and hesitant, “If….if you want me to leave...I can, I know it’s probably-”

“I barely remember that, it’s fine,” he sighed, feeling exhausted all over again, “Not your fault either so stop looking guilty, it’s gross on your puppy dog face,” he muttered, eyelashes fluttering.

“I don’t have a puppy dog face,” Steve argued gently, dabbing at Clint’s face even more gently.

“Keep tellin’ yerself that…” Clint mumbled as he nodded off once more, biology making him more relaxed since he knew there was an alpha near that he trusted. His nightmares left him alone for the rest of the night.

Steve kept wiping at his face long after he’d gone back to sleep.

 

~

 

“This is harder to handle than I thought,” Steve muttered, rubbing his face.

“Not everyday you find out you might be a father after you raped your missing packmate, who clearly does not want to carry your child,” Tony said and Steve sighed giving the back of Tony’s head a look.

“It’s not Clint’s fault.”

“I know.” Tony’s voice was curt.

“Tony…”

“I know, Steve.” This time he nearly growled.

Steve sighed, yeah, it was hard. Clint wasn’t dealing well, he’d been having nightmares nearly every night and emotional trauma was not the easiest thing to heal from when you had a constant reminder present. It was terrible watching a packmate suffer like that and being able to do absolutely nothing to help.

“I mean, seriously, what is his problem? Does he really hate us that much? Or-” Tony cut himself off and took a deep breath, running a hand down his face, “Shit.”

“That’s your instincts talking,” Steve said softly, “I know how it feels.”

“Oh right, but you don’t let them control you, you’re the perfect alpha, you’re Captain Freaking Am-”

“Tony,” Steve said sharply.

Tony stopped and took another deep breath, shoving the piece of machinery he’d been trying to distract himself with away, “Dammit,” he muttered, “Sorry...I’m just…”

“You’re just..?”

“I don’t know? Hurt, shocked, confused? Too many damn feelings, on top of worrying about Clint, I’m...I’m worrying about what could possibly our kid, I never really thought about kids you know, I’m a little past my prime. Having kids just never seemed like something-” he let out a soft breath, “Now that it is possible, I don’t really want to give it up. But Clint...god, he just freaks out at the sight of his stomach...”

Steve looked at him, contemplatively, “I know,” he said softly, “I’ve wanted children almost my whole life, I thought….I thought I was going to settle down after the war, find a dame- I found Peggy instead, I’d had day dreams of our life after the war, living wherever she wanted, the US, London, I didn’t care, have Bucky there with me to help with the kids, he was a Beta, he would have been a great uncle,” he sighed, “But...it didn’t happen, and it never will, not with them, I always thought that it was beyond me now, that the Avengers was my life.”

Tony was staring at him a bit wide eyed, of course he hadn’t known any of that, “Steve…”

Steve smiled sadly at first but then it brightened, “And it’s true, they are my life now, everyone is my pack now, it’s different from the Commandos, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Clint probably won’t want to keep the baby and that’ll be hard for all of us, but we’re still a pack and we have to stick together.”

Tony nodded, “Good to know, Cap,” he cocked his head to the side, “Did you practice that or-” Steve punched him in the arm and Tony laughed even as he rubbed his arm.

“Alright...so...we’re gonna give up the baby, no matter whose it is?”

Steve nodded, “I think it’ll help Clint feel better, knowing he won’t be forced into anything else.”

Tony nodded, “Agreed, alright, I have next watch, I’ll tell him if he wakes up.”

Steve smiled, it hurt, sure, but they would do what was best.

Of course, that didn’t mean things would actually go according to plan.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just more feels basically.

The next time Clint woke up it was to the tapping of a finger on a screen, he turned over and saw Tony sitting in a chair next to him, focused on his tablet, Clint watched him for awhile, he didn’t even seem to know Clint was awake. But when Clint was about to roll over and go back to sleep Tony reached over to the bedside table and grabbed a glass of water with a straw then handed it to Clint.

“Drink,” he said and then went back to tapping when Clint took the glass, Clint frowned at him but put the straw in his mouth and drank and holy crap he was thirsty, his mouth was so dry, he finished it off quickly and then slumped against the bed and gasped a bit because he’d totally forgotten to breath.

“Feel better?” Tony asked, finally looking up at him.

“Define ‘better’,” Clint replied, then sighed, “I’d feel better if I could put this whole thing behind me...but I guess it’s not gonna happen.”

“Mmm,” he replied, “Hate kids that much?”

“Are you guys on a watch rotation?” Clint asked back totally avoiding the question.

“Yeah, Natasha made sure there was one of us here at all times, she doesn’t trust SHIELD to cut the baby out of you if they find out it’s Steve’s, as if mine wouldn’t be just as amazing. So now you answer my question,” he replied and Clint scowled at him.

“You are not my alpha, you don’t get to tell me what to do,” he growled.

“I wouldn’t tell you what to do even if I was,” Tony replied, “It was just a question, honestly, I never took you for someone who hated kids.”

“....I don’t hate kids,” Clint replied glaring at him, “I just don’t want to parent any and being forced to do so is a worst nightmare scenario for me.”

“Ah,” Tony said, “Well...alright, why?”

“Because they’re annoying and loud and I hate them,” Clint deadpanned, Tony rolled his eyes.

“Fine, you ask the questions, bossy pants.”

“How long?” he asked and Tony sighed and set his tablet aside.

“You were gone for about three and a half months...and we were taken about three weeks in, and you’ve been in and out of consciousness here for a few weeks...so you’re at least four months along,” he said and Clint sighed.

“Great, only five more months of sitting on my ass and going insane,” he grunted, he glanced at Tony, “Are you keeping it?”

Tony pressed his mouth together and looked at him for a long moment, “If you really don’t want the baby...then Steve and I both agreed we’d give it up for adoption.”

Clint looked surprised, that was a really uncommon thing, when an Alpha knew it had a child, it kept it, that’s what Alphas did, they made kids. But it did take an Omega to give birth to one and then feed it. He pressed his lips together and his eyebrows furrowed.

“But…why?” he asked.

“Because you are more important to the team, and if it really makes you uncomfortable…”

Clint shook his head, “Tony...you and Steve would eventually start to resent and hate me because of it, an alpha giving up it’s kids, that’s just not how you work,” he sighed and rubbed his face.

“I think we could handle it…” Tony replied with a frown.

“Maybe...for awhile, but...you’re alphas, and Steve probably always wanted kids, and you’re a powerful rich alpha, you’ll want an heir eventually and you wouldn’t be able to deal knowing there might be another kid out there with rights to your fortune and you don’t know them at all,” he shrugged, “I’ll deal...probably won’t be around much...but…I’ll be there when I’m needed.”

Tony frowned more at him, “You got us all figured out?”

“Kinda my job to,” he said, “So...yeah.”

“Mmm,” he stared at Clint for a long moment, he wasn’t going to change his mind, “...alright, I’ll tell Steve, now go back to sleep, you look like you’re about to conk out, I’ll have some food waiting for you, good stuff too.”

“Don’t gotta...take care of me…” Clint muttered and god, why was he so tired? All he ever did was sleep, this was ridiculous.

“I’m not, Legolas, I’m taking care of my heir,” Tony replied facetiously just as he slipped off to sleep.

 

~

 

“Okay...so...Clint said...well he talked me into agreeing to let us keep the kid.”

“What?” Steve nearly missed the punching bag instead grazing it and causing it to swing wildly to the side.

“I...don’t know, but he had a convincing argument so...um he’s going to let us have it, or you know whoever the father is. He still says he wants nothing to do with it, but…”

Steve grabbed the bag and let out a breath resting his head against the reinforced material (Tony got tired of buying new ones every time Steve punched a hole through them), “Okay...so do we...put it down to him being emotionally compromised or..?”

“Shit, I don’t know,” Tony groaned, “I feel like he wouldn’t have said it if he didn’t mean it? He sounded reasonable...I really don’t know.”

“He’s definitely the type to sacrifice himself for someone else...what else did he say?” Steve muttered, because it was true, Clint was selfless, throwing his life on the line for innocents without a second thought, he’d done it for many people while he’d been Avenging. It was terrifying for his pack, but it let them know he was a good person, and that he was occasionally an idiot.

“That he just wouldn’t be around much,” Tony snorted, “So he’d probably try to leave the pack, or pretend like he was, but eventually just leave entirely.”

Steve frowned, they couldn’t have that, Clint was too important to them all for him to leave.

“We’ll have to convince him somehow that he can’t...I suppose, I don’t know how, but we have time for that,” he sighed, “But we can’t pressure him into anything…”

“Yeah, no, that wouldn’t be fair, he’s also a stubborn shit, he’s going to say no no matter what out of sheer principle,” Tony replied crossing his arms.

“We’ll...just wait until the baby is born...I guess...maybe he’ll change his mind and we can go from there?”

“That doesn’t seem like your kind of plan, Cap,” Tony said mildly.

“Can’t be a tactical genius for fatherhood,” he replied in kind and Tony offered him a lopsided grin.

“Yeah...or as a packmate,” he sighed, “I guess you’re right. Just see how it goes.”

“Yeah, good thing I’m great at waiting,” Steve deadpanned.

Tony snorted a laugh in shock, because he knew being frozen for so long had been a bit of a taboo subject for Steve but maybe he was ‘thawing’ about it, just a bit. It was nice to know they were getting closer.

But it was true, all they could do was wait.

 

~

 

Clint woke up again to the smell of food and Thor’s smiling face, “Good morning my friend, it is so wonderful to see you awake!”

“Nnnnnggg….” Clint replied, Thor’s cheerfulness was not what he usually wanted to wake up to, but it was sort of refreshing, “I smell real food…”

“Ah yes, Anthony insisted there be fresh food when you awoke and when it looked like you were about to come out of it I asked for your food to be brought, there is soup and some other easily digested foods,” Thor said, “Do you require assistance to sit up?”

Clint was more than ready to have food, but not chewing real food for more than four months meant his stomach would need to get used to it again, he sighed, at least the soup smelled good, and there were even some soft foods, jello, and a smoothie, and strawberry pudding, nice, flavor varieties that was nice. He tried sitting up but couldn’t even get halfway, “No, I’m fine,” he said, because he did not need to be babied by Thor, he felt around the side finding the little panel on the side that raised the bed a little, and that of course let him really see his belly, it wasn’t that big yet, but he was definitely showing, he’d probably be showing more if gravity had anything to say about it.

He could tell his body was messed up because he’d been laying down for so long because it hurt to sit up just as much as he was already which was not much, damn whoever it was-

“Hey, Thor, did they figure out who exactly kidnapped and knocked me up?” he asked and Thor looked a bit confused by the term, ‘knocked up’ was probably not normal slang for pregnancy on Asgard, but he nodded understanding anyway.

“Yes, it was an organization that was called Hydra Rebirth, from what I understand they were trying to create the ultimate super soldier using the Captain’s DNA and Anthony’s, I do believe they were intending to make sure there was a child from each of them so they could...mate them…. I am sorry Clinton, I did not mean to disturb you.”

Clint must have looked pretty sick, because he felt that way, “God fucking dammit,” he muttered, “No, it’s fine,” he took a deep breath to stop himself from puking, “I...just talk about something else, one of your adventures or something, take my mind off it so I can eat.”

“Of course, my friend, have I ever told you the tale of the time I bested a whole army?” Thor asked and Clint shook his head, leading Thor to start in on a grand tale about the whole thing, it took a little while, but Clint was distracted enough to start eating, he ended up eating it all, but he got sick only an hour or so later, but that seemed to be what he’d have to do to eat, to get his stomach used to the idea again. Eat and then get sick, he really hated getting sick.

 

They stopped feeding him through the tube and didn’t have to give him hormones so much after another week, he’d been hormone overloaded so it wasn’t needed consistently. Apparently it had almost tricked his body into making them itself, but not quite, it was more like it took the hormones and kept them and used them as needed, but it would run out, so he only needed them every few weeks, that was nice, he hated having IVs.

And naturally his whole ‘just not have the hormones anymore’ idea was vetoed when it turned out even taking the baby out stillborn could still hurt him.

He wouldn’t admit it but that was somewhat of a relief, somehow, he wasn’t sure how to feel. He was scared, that was for damn sure, but he didn’t really have that frantic, ‘get out of me’ thing going on anymore, any time he said something like it, it was really just for appearances sake. And it was only ever around Natasha. He was still aware that he didn’t want the others hating him just yet.

But maybe it would be better if the kid went to Steve or Tony, he still didn’t want anything to do with it, he knew if he had any say in the matter that it would definitely end badly.

 

~

 

Tony thrust a tablet at Steve, “Mark down your preferences for a nursery on here and I’ll see what I can do,” he demanded.

Steve blinked at the Amazon list of baby supplies on the screen, “What?”

“For the nursery- yours anyway, I figured we should just get the jump on things while we can, and we don’t know whose it is because of whatever they injected in him to block scans, so we might as well just be prepared and both have one, you can have one in the guest bedroom, the colors are up to you, theme whatever, so yeah.”  
Steve stared at Tony, “Okay,” he said slowly, “Just...anything?”

Tony just rolled his eyes, “Seriously, Rogers, it’s not like I’m short on the money to do it.”

“Yes...but-”

“I’m not trying to alpha you, don’t get your tail in a twist,” Tony muttered, “Just thought I’d do you a favor.”

“I didn’t think you were, I’m just...surprised you thought of me...that’s all,” Steve said, he’d had the idea of a nursery in the back of his head for a little while now, and having Tony approach him about it, well it was certainly surprising, but also pleasing.

“Mmm, well I did, so order it whatever, just get whatever,” Tony said flapping his hand, turning to go, Steve snagged his wrist before he got too far.

“Hey,” he said and Tony glanced at him, “Thank you.”

Tony blinked but offered him a crooked smile, “Sure.”

Steve let him go and watched him go but then turned to the tablet in his hand, there were so many things that babies seemed to need this century, this was going to need a lot more time than he’d originally thought.

 

~

 

Bruce came by for his shift and bless his heart, brought Clint some puzzles to do, they were the hands on 3D kind, thinking Clint would like those best, and he was right, Clint really was a hands on kind of guy, he liked feeling what he was doing.

He was in the middle of a three dimensional octogonal one when he finally decided to ask what he’d been thinking.

“Are they going to hand it off to you? After it’s here, I mean, you’re the omega...I don’t think that’s fair at all if they did...it wouldn’t surprise me if they asked,” Clint said vaguely, Bruce looked at him over his glasses.

“No, Tony knew better, I don’t think it would be a good idea for me to nurse the baby, who knows whether the radiation would affect me there or not, I wouldn’t want to risk the child.”

“Oh…” he hadn’t considered that, that meant he would have to.

“I don’t think they expect anything from you Clint, and while it is best for the mother’s milk to be given to newborns they can always go with formula, but you will start lactating after the baby is born, it’s just how the body works, you won’t have to do anything and it will stop,” Bruce explained and Clint bit his lip and nodded.

He wouldn’t have to do anything, just be an incubator, he could handle that, right?

Yeah, he really didn’t have any connection to the kid, it would never even have to know that he was it’s mother. Tony or Steve would make fine single dads, probably. Steve definitely, Tony might freak out a little bit, but he’d do alright. Clint knew he had his own daddy issues and would do anything to be nothing like his own dad. Which would really make all the difference.

So it wasn’t a problem, he just needed to wait this out.

“Right,” he agreed, “I can deal.”

 

~

 

Tony sighed as he sat down next to Steve, “Have you noticed how utterly depressing it is in that medical room?”

“Yes,” Steve said mildly not looking up from his sketchpad, “Clint would probably do better here, but I already asked about moving him here, the doctors don’t want to ‘risk’ it.”

“Meaning they don’t want to risk the baby leaving their custody if it’s yours,” Tony said and Steve sighed but didn’t deny that that was likely the truth.

“There’s no guarantee that the serum is even passed on genetically,” Steve said, since Dr. Erskine was long gone, there was no way to know, except of course Steve reproducing and them finding out that way. Which was both unethical and likely damaging to a newborn.

“Nope,” Tony agreed, “I’m gonna get him new pillows.”

“You’re- what?” Steve looked up at Tony confused and the other man grinned.

“For Clint’s room, I’m also going to bug it, just in case, I don’t like that SHIELD is now suddenly so interested in him again,” Tony said, and it was true, Fury signed off on him being permanently transferred to SHIELD ages ago, while Natasha and even Steve still did missions for them, Clint opted out because of the Loki thing, Clint felt he was no longer welcome. So he was just an Avenger. He kind of hated it because they only got called out every so often and he hated being idle, but it was better than being glared out every time he walked down the hall.

“Ah,” Steve said and then frowned in thought, “Might be easier to have them in something he’s not going to sleep on,” he said and then gestured at his sketch pad, “I could whip something up, it is really bland in those rooms, give it some color.”

“Perfect,” Tony grinned, “And now we can maybe get a break, just in case we are called out, we’ve been lucky so far...but it can’t hold out. I’ll have them hooked up to JARVIS too so we can be notified immediately if something is wrong.”

“Sounds good to me,” Steve said, “JARVIS is better surveillance than I’ve ever encountered before.”

“Thank you, Captain,” the AI said, sounding as pleased as he could, Tony smirked with pride.

“Yeah, he is the best,” Tony said and then shrugged, “Okay, he can have some pillows anyway, hospital beds suck.”

“That has never been true,” Steve replied with a little wry smirk.

“I thought everything was better in the 40s?” Tony asked, grinned.

“Sure was,” Steve nodded, “Except that.”

“And the medicine?”

“Hey, leeches had their purposes,” Steve said, obviously trying not to laugh, Tony did however.

“God, don’t tell that to Clint, I wouldn’t put it past him to try.”

“Oh no,” Steve put his face in his hand, “Don’t even bring it up to him.”

“Nope,” Tony shook his head but the smiled slowly slid from his face, “He’s starting to slip,” he muttered and Steve sighed.

“I know…” he said softly, “I don’t know what to do about it.”

“We can sick Natasha on him?”

Steve snorted, “Probably our best bet at the moment.”

Tony sighed and nodded, it was really their only bet. So they’d take it.

 

~

 

“Oh my god, just kill me please,” he groaned, he was only five months in, and he seriously just needed it gone.

“Mmm, I’ll think about it,” Natasha said mildly, flipping through her magazine idly, Clint frowned and pouted, slumped against the fancy goose feather pillows he had now to lay against, Tony had insisted he wasn’t alphaing him, but Clint could tell he had the whole ‘must nurture omega carrying my young’ thing going on, Steve was way more subtle about it. But Clint was still laying on the softest pillows available courtesy of Tony and there were some drawing on the walls to color it up a bit courtesy of Steve.

And they didn’t even know whose it was, and they weren't going to find out until it was born, they weren’t even competing either, but that was nice. Clint would have ripped their heads off if they had started in on that.

But either way, he was bored, he had a TV with all of the internet's worth of movies and shows on it, and a tablet with games and internet access and books and more puzzles and a drawing pad and everything, but he was a really active person sitting still so long was torture for him- as long as he didn’t have a target to focus on that was. He’d sat in a sniper’s nest for 32 hours straight and didn’t move a muscle and took the shot, but now, with nothing to focus on, he was going crazy.

“Naaat,” he whined, sounding utterly pathetic. He even pushed his bottom lip out further.

Natasha sighed and closed her magazine, “Will you shut up if I take you outside for fifteen minutes?”

“Yes!” he said immediately, sitting up just a bit more and waiting for her to grab the wheelchair, and then help him into it, he wasn’t allowed on his feet, at all really, even getting into the wheelchair took help from one of the stronger nurses, who nearly just scooped Clint up and put him down in it. It was a near near thing. Clint would have protested if it was an all the way thing. They were lucky they were sneaky.

Natasha wheeled him out of the room after wrapping him up in several blankets and headed for the elevator, “Not the garden?” Clint asked and she shook her head.

“You’ve been good, you’ve complained minimally, you’ve eaten, you’ve slept, you’ve done everything you should despite the fact that you’re here because of something you hate,” she said and Clint sighed.

“I don’t hate it...I just don’t want it.”

“You’re scared of it,” Natasha said and Clint snorted, but didn’t argue.

“And I don’t complain because when I do I start getting really emotional, I’d really prefer not to start sobbing about my damn pudding not being chocolate,” he said and Natasha hummed and pushed him out of the elevator and onto a snowy balcony, not quite as high as the roof, but it was still high enough to make him feel better, he took in a deep breath of crisp November air and slouched in the chair.

“I’ll make sure they always give you chocolate then,” Natasha promised, Clint shook his head.

“Then I’d want vanilla, the damn thing just is not satisfied with anything, I swear, it’s annoying.”

“That’s pregnancy for you I guess,” she replied, “You’ll live, just order both then.”

“...huh, that’s an idea.”

Natasha chuckled and sat down next to him on a bench.

“Are you really okay with this? What’s planned?”

“You mean Stark or Rogers taking it? No...I really would prefer it gone, that would make life so much easier...but...but I also consider all of the lives I’ve already taken, it would be so bad for me to take another, and a child...I was so frantic when you first found me...like if it was gone everything would be okay again, that I could forget about everything, and sometimes I still feel like that, but it wouldn’t, the alphas would be hurt by it too...and...me,” he shook his head, “Would I be okay with it? It’s part mine too...isn’t it? But god...what if I mess it up, Nat? What if all that’s awful in me comes up in the kid? I just...I don’t know...I can’t...I just can’t deal with it, with all of it, the responsibility, the worry, I can’t even take care of myself.” He shook his head, “Maybe it’s better if I just go once it’s out…”

“You can’t, they are pack now...you know that, we’ve never bonded so well with a team before,” she said, “You would miss them all fiercely,” she added.

And that was true, even after everything and dealing with it all, they still came by for their normal routines, Tony would show him videos of the explosions he’d done, Thor would play video games with him, Bruce would share new recipes with him for them to try, and Steve would show him youtube videos of past fights and they would strategize on how to do things better.

They had never given up on him and kept his spot in the pack open for him and accepted him right back in. Clint had never had that before, he couldn’t leave them, it would hurt too much.

“Yeah…” he sighed in reply, “Can’t leave you either.”

“Idiot,” she said and kissed his cheek, “I would come with you.”

He smiled and enjoyed the sunshine on his face even if it was cold, it was all okay, he wasn’t alone.

 

~

 

Nightmares were rampant, the bugs, the child he’d killed, all of his worst childhood memories manifesting and unleashing on the child inside him, he really hated it, he almost wanted to ask for the sedative back and just let him sleep until it was out, it would be so much easier. He didn’t think he could last much longer anyway, this was a nightmare in itself. Watching his stomach grow as the child in him grew, making him moody and sick and crave things and teary and just a mess. He hated it, and he hated being locked up in SHIELD medical and not at home in bed.

The team did what they could to help, Tony and Steve being around more as it came closer and closer to the date they’d estimated for birth, but they never pushed about anything baby related, Clint knew Tony was already planning a nursery on both his own floor and one for Steve, and Clint had no doubt that Steve was planning on painting it himself.

It was a shame they couldn’t find out the gender, they had tried using an ultrasound, but it hadn’t been clear, they knew there was a baby in there, at least there was a the shape of one, but something must have been done to make it hard to see it growing, and Clint couldn’t find how that was helpful at all, considering his captors had wanted to make the perfect baby.

He supposed it didn’t matter in the end, that was over, he was stuck in SHIELD instead staring at the wall. He had counted the ceiling tiles dozens of times, he had the wall memorized and knew that there was a crack in the plaster on the bottom half near the door, he also knew the wall shook when the door opened to his room and to the room next door. It was awful.

“Uuuuuuuuuhg,” he groaned, and ignored the pat to his knee he got from Bruce who was looking at a tablet, keeping an eye on experiments back in his lab.

“Just hang in there a little longer,” he said and Clint scowled.

“How about you be bed bound with a parasite growing in you and keep having people tell you to wait a little longer?” Clint snapped and then groaned and rubbed his forehead, “Sorry…”

“It’s fine, you must be frustrated, I’m surprised you made it this long actually,” Bruce admitted, Clint pouted.

“Gee, thanks,” Bruce only pat his knee again.

Clint sighed and stayed laying and angsting where he was, this sucked so bad.

 

~

 

Steve entered Tony’s lab noting the ‘diaper robot’ in the corner with faint amusement, but he had a reason for coming down here.

“He keeps looking worse and worse,” he said watching Tony jump at the sudden voice, he’d assumed JARVIS warned him.

“Jay…”

“I told you the Captain was on his way five minutes ago, Sir,” the AI said patiently.

“Oh,” Tony said and then blinked at Steve, “Wait what?”

“Clint, he keeps looking worse and worse,” Steve said, “His nightmares… he hasn’t slept through the night once in the last week.”

“Oh, yeah...it’s also making him grumpy, if it keeps up...he’s going to make bad decisions,” Tony said, “I make bad decisions when I’m tired.”

Steve gave him an amused look, Tony blinked innocently, “What?”

“You make bad decisions no matter what,” Steve said wryly then chuckled when Tony flipped him off.

“Screw you, Rogers,” Tony huffed and then sighed, “Is there anything we can do to help, do you think?”

Steve sighed, “I don’t know, just reassure him in anyway we can, I guess,” he replied running a hand through his hair.

“He’s not that easy…” Tony sighed, “Just gonna do the ‘wait and see’?”

“I don’t think we can do much else,” Steve said, resigned to the long game.

“Great...well, you want to help? I could use a pair of muscles for some of my projects,” Tony asked.

Steve looked at him in surprise but smiled after a moment, “Sure, why not?”

Tony grinned and started in on his projects, Steve helping out when needed.

At least something was coming out of all of this.

 

~

 

Clint knew he was being a pain, and he knew his teammates were being amazing but he couldn’t help but hate them a little bit, they all seemed to be taking this so well, like it was no big deal, and he was close to going postal, he was handling it so badly, he couldn’t think anymore about this, about a kid, it was terrifying, and he just wanted to run away.

But god, what he’d wanted before, to kill it, that was even worse. How could he ever consider that even in his panic? He was sick. He was the soulless freak he’d been called so many times before, god, how could he say those things? Think them? He just couldn’t believe he’d thought that, about a child, about his child.

He choked on the overwhelming rush of emotion that surged through him, he had to take several deep breaths to calm himself, but it was impossible, he just kept thinking how he knew he would never be good enough for his kid. He was sure even his own father hadn’t thought these thoughts about him. But Clint, he’d done such bad, and terrible things and he’d killed, he’d killed children, he could never treat a person right, let alone one that needed love and care and compassion. He was so wrong for this, so wrong. He would never be good.

He never deserved to be a parent.

He grabbed one of the pillows on his bed and shoved it over his face to try and stifle his sobs, he knew he was getting it wet and making a mess of his face, but he just couldn’t stop.

He held it to his face until he fell asleep, still disgusted by his own actions and thoughts even as his dreams took him.

 

~

 

Tony came into the room looking at his tablet but raised his eyes to greet Clint only to find a pillow over his head, he frowned, but knew he wasn’t dead as his chest was still rising and falling, but still it was a little worrisome.

He moved over to the bed and pulled the pillow off, Clint was asleep, but it wasn’t peaceful and there were tear tracks on his face.

Tony knew Clint was prone to violent emotional bouts as it had happened more than once, but he usually got over it after the hormones calmed down, he figured this was maybe a little bit more, probably related to his thoughts on the baby.

Tony hated to admit it, but Clint was right, he would have eventually hated Clint if he had to give up his child. Yes, they were a surprise, but Tony knew now that having one some day was all a part of the plan, he wasn’t getting any younger either. He was the second oldest of the group after Bruce, so he really did need to get on it. He’d never really found anyone he really wanted to mate with anyway.

He’d never had a real pack before either, which probably mattered. Tony did like Bruce, a lot, but he didn’t want to like him because he was the only omega. He did love Bruce’s mind however. Damn those beautiful brains of his.

He had also found a fast friend in Clint, which he’d been a little surprised about. Clint was smart, really smart, and actually not a bad engineer, it turned out he designed all of his own trick arrows, and before SHIELD, had made them all himself. And of course they both enjoyed a good explosion.

They also sassed each other a lot, that was fun, Tony liked being able to do that with people, it was refreshing.

Though he’d never really considered Clint as his child’s mother, but thinking about it now, it really wasn’t a bad consideration. Clint was smart, strong, skilled, and certainly not unattractive, he was sure their kid would be something great.

He didn’t like how it had come about, however, he could see how much it was tearing the other man apart, Tony could tell, he didn’t want the responsibility because he was scared, but he also didn’t want the guilt, he knew it was a lot deeper than that, but that was the base for everything.

Tony didn’t blame him. He really didn’t.

But he was right, it wasn’t a good feeling. Knowing the omega carrying your young didn’t want it didn’t feel good.

But that didn’t mean he would stop caring.

He sighed and put the pillow aside, sitting down again, pulling out his tablet he started in designing the baby’s room again, it was going to be awesome. And if there was a plan for a little place to hold a little decorative bow, well...Clint was never going to go in, why would he need to know?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a lot more angst, but hey getting some things figured out.


	5. Chapter 5

Clint woke up what felt like a moment later, but had probably been several hours, watching as Steve and Tony switched off, Tony must have accidentally stayed longer than normal again, he knew they were going more lenient now that they had to do life again. And Tony had installed bugs to watch him at all times too, just in case, Clint wasn’t blind. So seeing them together was a little rare.

He gazed at them, ignoring the crusty feeling of his eyes, they were both so...calm. Clint was sure he’d never seen them like that around each other before.

They were talking, Tony was showing Steve something on his tablet and Steve was smiling, soft and fond, nodding. Agreeing to something. Tony was smiling too.

The baby. They were agreeing about the baby.

Clint knew then that it would be so much better without him, Tony and Steve would be perfect parents.

He let out a soft breath and closed his eyes. He just needed to distance himself, if he compartmentalized it, he wouldn’t have to worry about it anymore.

He would leave it to them, and he would just play the role that he knew.

He felt Steve come into the room all the way and take a seat a moment later, he also felt the gentle touch to his hair as he passed by.

He let out another puff of air and resolved to do it, he didn’t need sympathy, he just needed to carry the baby to term and disappear.

~

Steve knew Clint was withdrawing, just like he thought he would, he didn’t really talk to him anymore, he didn’t talk to anyone anymore, just Natasha, and she was not one to explain what was going on if it wasn’t her business to explain.

He could still tell and that worried him. He was eating, he was sleeping, he was doing everything to keep the child healthy, he just wasn’t involved.

And that worried Steve, he had hoped that maybe somehow Clint would find he could accept the child, that maybe want to be involved if only a little, but with how he was acting now he got that he was getting the complete opposite.

He was going to hurt himself, and the rest of the pack if it continued.

“Clint,” he said softly, leaning close to him, “I…” he pressed his lips together, “I can’t imagine what this is like for you...but I know that pulling away...it won’t help,” he said softly, and Clint didn’t even turn towards him, “You can’t pull away from us now, please don’t.”

Clint was silent for a long while, but then glanced at Steve, “I will be here when you need me, Captain.”

Steve opened his mouth, then closed it, he didn’t know what to say to convince Clint he needed to stay, and not for the baby. But for himself.

  
Steve didn’t blame him for any of this, he really didn’t. He knew the man had gone through a lot in his time at SHIELD, so clearly he had reservations. It hurt to know that all of them prevented him from enjoying his own child, even if it had been forced upon him by maniacs, it was here now. Steve was certainly of that mindset.

He had wanted a family, a long time ago, a whole age now, he’d imagined it, settling down with Peggy, having a pack with the Commandos and Bucky, raising their children after the war, it had been a pipe dream. He never thought he would ever get there after he woke from the ice. He thought he would fight until he died, but now like a gift he had a child coming, he was decorating the room that would be it’s nursery, a few splashes of purple in with the yellow just because.

Steve would like for Clint to be involved, but he knew forcing him would be the worst punishment the man could imagine. But Steve could tell that this whole thing was a whole lot harder for him than he let on, he had a few bad days in the beginning but that was easy to pass off as trauma from all that had happened to get him here. But he was still stubbornly refusing, so Steve knew there was more to it than that.

He would help if he could.

Steve enjoyed Clint’s company, they sparred together regularly, or they had, and then gone to eat at cafes from time to time, Clint knew the best places to get coffee. The man was a coffee addict, it was worrisome but also strangely endearing.

Steve would never dictate to him, of course, Clint was too independent for that anyway. He just wished he wasn’t this independant.

Steve wanted to share some of this with him, he thought after all of this, he deserved to see why it would be worth it in the end. At least he hoped.

~

Clint knew that he was hurting himself and the pack, Natasha had told him so many times, but he couldn’t stop, he knew in the end this would be for the best, he couldn’t handle it any other way. It would be better for everyone if he wasn’t involved with anything anymore, except Avengers business. He had always known he wouldn’t be good for a pack, and this was just proof.

They would be better off if he kept his distance, especially with a baby in tow.

No, Clint cared about them all too much to let himself fuck it up.

And he wouldn’t.

So he believed.

His dream was odd, but he was no stranger to odd dreams, especially recently, the baby seemed to think it was nice to make him dream about dancing turnips or singing pudding, and it only got weirder.

But tonight it was just...odd.

He was swimming, it was a huge pool just the right temperature, lounging in it was easy and swimming was just as much fun, he turned and there was another pool, this one was outside, and it was snowing, the pool had ice in it, Natasha was swimming in that one, she was lounging about too, she waved at him and he got out of his own pool to join her. The ice was floating around in big chunks, but the water wasn’t cold to him.

He moved over to her and she smiled at him, he swam over to her and found that she was sitting in a sauna, lava rocks steaming from the cold water, he sat next to her and was about to ask a question but something fell in front of him. Floating in the water, a plop of bubbles sounded as it resurfaced from the drop. He lifted it up and it was a shoe, a baby shoe, so small it was smaller than his hand.

He looked up only to find there were babies and children falling from the sky, but they were falling too fast, they needed to be caught, he couldn’t catch them all by himself, but there were others now, Steve and Tony catching them before they hit the water too fast or the walkways.

Clint watched on in horror, it was awful, and it only got worse, he saw a baby falling far too fast, and no one else saw it, he tried to shout out but he couldn’t so he tried to move, tried to get there in time, but the water was holding him back, keeping him from getting there in time, he watched as the child hit the walkway.

He cried out but Natasha touched his arm, “It’s too late Clint, you can’t save him.”

“No please!” he reached out touching the small body and turning him over, his blue eyes matching Clint’s own, void of life.

“No!”

He woke with a gasp and a cry, but this cry was in pain, he jerked in the bed, his hand going to his belly, the sudden pain waking him up, but it started to fade soon enough, he gasped from the residual pain, and looked around, it was the middle of the night and Steve was slouched in the chair next to his bed, sleeping or he had been until he had jerked awake at the sound of the gasp and was looking at Clint in worry.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his hand reaching out wanting to comfort but not sure how.

“It hurts,” he gasped, hand still on his belly, Steve’s face paled slightly and he stood then went to call for the nurses.

It only took a moment for them to come in followed by the doctor, they started checking everything including vitals and the baby.

“It looks like you’re going into labor, Agent Barton,” The doctor said a moment later.

“Wh-what?” he frowned as what seemed to be another contraction hit, “But...it’s too soon...isn’t it?”

“You’re only seven months, so yes, it’s too soon, but the baby doesn’t know that,” the doctor said, “We need to prepare for a premature birth.”

Steve must have called the others as they appeared maybe half an hour later and Clint was really starting to hurt. Natasha was holding his hand and taking it like a champ every time he had to hold on tighter through the pain, he was trying to keep it all in now, not making a noise so the others didn’t have to worry.

That didn’t seem to stop Steve and Tony however, they were fretting like chickens with their heads cut off, or close enough anyway.

Tony was typing on his tablet faster than usual, no doubt looking up what to do for premature babies.

Steve was watching with his bottom lip between his teeth, unable to help like he wanted to, and getting a bit fidgety as he watched. But he didn’t seem quite as panicked as Tony.

Clint eventually didn’t give a damn about either of them once it got to be too painful and when he had to actually do the pushing, then he was hoping for pain on each of them because of their spawn, he kept his mouth shut for as long as possible, until it became too much and he had to shout out from the pain, which according to the doctors was more significant than normal birthing pains because of Clint’s bedridden condition. Thankfully the labor didn’t last too long as the baby was small, it was moved immediately to an incubator, and Tony was already talking to the doctors about how to make it better and more effective, apparently he’d been looking up how to do just that.

Clint didn’t care, he just did what the doctor told him to, the placenta came a little while after that and then he was able to rest and breath, let the pain fade.

Steve came over next to him a long while later, Clint hadn’t noticed he’d fallen asleep until he felt Steve next to him, he cracked an eye open.

“So...what’s the verdict?” he asked, his voice a bit rough and a bit slurred from all the cut off cries of pain and exhaustion.

“It’s a boy...and it’s Tony’s,” Steve replied, “He could tell the moment he was near enough to smell him, he was twice as insistent about the incubator after that too.”

“Sorry,” Clint said, “I know you both wanted it to be yours...sorry it’s not yours.”

“It’s fine, Clint, I’m just glad you’re both okay, you and the baby,” Steve pat Clint’s hand and Clint snorted, he could tell Steve was more than just a bit sad and disappointed to find out the baby wasn’t his.

“Well...Tony’ll probably need help anyway…” he said, and relaxed a bit, trying not to feel bereft...or empty knowing the baby was gone and he wasn’t going to hold him.

“Maybe,” Steve smiled, “Doubt he’d let me help,” he smiled probably for Clint’s benefit.

“Well, either way...I’m just glad I’ll be able to walk again,” he sighed into the pillows watching as the nurses and doctors finished up their business and headed out.

“You’ll certainly try before you’re able, I’m sure,” Natasha said idly already starting to put his things away to take back to the Tower, “We’ll take you back after you’ve had some sleep, at least eight hours.”

Clint groaned, “Can’t I sleep at the Tower?”

“No, they still want to make sure you’re okay, you just gave birth, Clint, the normal time frame is 24 hours, but you’re stubborn, I got you twelve, so take what you can get and sleep a little then you can eat and sleep some more.”

“Uhg...Steeeeve,” he whined and Steve laughed.

“Don’t look at me! Natasha’s the boss with this one,” he smiled and Clint sighed, he was maybe feeling a little in need of rest, he had been awake for- he glanced at the clock- oh, about twelve hours already, giving birth even...so okay, he was tired.

“Fine...but I expect those pillows to be on my bed at the Tower,” he muttered and Natasha smiled and kissed his forehead.

“Yes, your highness,” she teased, “Steve will be here if you need anything.”

“Okay…” he muttered and then drifted off to sleep, vaguely aware of Steve’s hand still resting on his.

~

Tony was a bit panicked, okay panicked was maybe too strong of a word for it, or he was really really worried on the verge of panic. The doctors had put his baby into an incubator the moment he was born, Tony didn’t like it, the incubator that was, he already saw some flaws he would be fixing soon, but right now he was staring at the tiny little being that was red and squishy and having some breathing problems looked to be struggling for life.

His son.

Tony wasn’t sure how to feel yet beyond the panic, he wanted the baby- his baby to be well. He was so small and fragile looking but Tony loved him already with every fiber of his being.

He had to stand back and wait and only watch as the doctors did all they could to save his life.

All Tony could do was wait.

And wait he did.

After several hours the baby was considered stable and Tony  was allowed to reach his hand in and put his big calloused finger in his son’s tiny hand.

“Hey kiddo,” he whispered, “Nice to meet you...even if it is early,” even if he’d really wished his ‘mother’ was ready to accept him. Tony got the feeling that wasn’t going to happen any time soon, but Tony wasn’t going to focus on that. He had an incubator to improve, he had seen just the few things premature babies could suffer from, breathing problems for one, he’d need a temperature controlled environment, and then a way to feed him and just a lot of things, Tony was already planning for a full neonatal care unit to be put into the Tower he was going to do all he could to prevent anything from happening to his baby.

His plans for the Tower, along with his new son, were definitely going to be keeping him busy.

~

“Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhg,” Clint groaned from his bed in the Tower, not being on his feet for the last seven almost eight months had not treated his muscles kindly, he absolutely hated it, and that he had a little paunch from the pregnant belly made him want to move all the more. It was a little big, according to his doctors, but he’d been so pumped full of hormones they didn’t think it was anything odd, he still felt out of sorts, he was off the hormones, he hoped that feeling would go away soon and life would just go back to normal.

“There there, at least you’re not dealing with Tony, he’s converted one of the medrooms into a room for the baby to hold the incubator and make sure he came out alright, he’s still freaking out about it,” Natasha said from beside him leaning against the headboard.

“I don’t care,” Clint said, but knew Natasha knew him better than anyone and instincts were what they were, Clint did want to know about the being he’d helped create and held in his body for the last seven months, “I just want to be able to walk by myself again, I just want to be a Beta again, goddamn, omegas have it awful.”

“Mmm,” she replied turning a page in her book, “It will take time, and yes, they do, be nice to Bruce.”

“I’m always nice to Bruce,” he huffed, then groaned again, “At least I can sit up all the way...still hurts though.”

“Probably will until you get back in shape, physical therapy has also been suggested,” Natasha informed him.

“Gross...but I guess that’s good...I hate it, but they know what they’re doing...alright, when can I start?” he asked and Natasha laughed softly.

“Not any time soon, you still have to heal, you dumbass,” she said, patting his leg.

“Like I said before...Uuuuuhg.”

~

Tony thought his new state of the art neonatal care room would be enough for his new baby, and at first, it had been, the little one had seemed to be getting better and better and he could finally let out a breath of relief, and then he’d stopped eating, Tony changed the formula to every single organic one he could get his hands on., the baby still wouldn’t eat. He would mewl and whine, Tony knew simply that he wanted something else.

“No...baby, you know you can’t, or I know you can’t your Mama doesn’t wa-shit...no, your mama does, he just doesn’t know it yet,” Tony let his head thunk against the glass on the incubator where his mewling baby was squirming. “I don’t know it yet...I wish I did. I wish he did…”

“Tony?”

Tony turned his face on the glass to see Steve standing there holding a sandwich.

“Please tell me that’s for me and you’re not a hallucination?”

“It’s for you and I’m not,” Steve smiled, moving in and placing the plate on the table in the corner then he grabbed the back of Tony’s chair and dragged it and him over to the table while the other alpha yelped.

“Hey!”

“Eat, I can watch him for five minutes,” Steve said, not that he needed much more watching with all of the sensors Tony had in the place.

“Yeah,” Tony sighed and did eat, but only because he was so friggin hungry, he got the feeling that was the only reason his son had eaten the first few days and now he’d developed a yearning for a taste for something better.

Yeah, definitely his kid. Dammit.

“He’s so tiny,” Steve murmured and he was compared to Steve’s hand, his finger was so big the tiny hand that belonged to the baby couldn’t even wrap around it.

“Yeah...that’s what he gets for comin’ two months early,” Tony said and sighed long suffering, “Impatient...uhg, definitely my kid.

Steve chuckled at that and stood up, “He’s fussy, is he okay?”

“He’s hungry, but he won’t eat,” Tony sighed, “I don’t know what to do...short of finding Clint and trying to squirt out some nonexistent milk.”

“Wow, I’m not sure I needed those visuals,” Steve said wryly, “And maybe you should ask? Maybe it will make him actually want to help out knowing the baby needs him?”

“I doubt it, but...I’ll ask anyway, he may not want the kid to live, but I do.”

“Tony,” Steve said scoldingly.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah…” Tony grumbled, “Can’t blame a man for being a little bitter…”

“No...but I can blame him for not trying,” Steve said and Tony scowled at him.

“Oh I’m sorry, are you really great at forgiving people while watching your kid struggle for life? Seriously, he should be over it by now, big traumatic experience whoop dee fucking do! He’s not weak minded, he’s just being a pain!”

Steve sighed but wasn’t going to argue, Tony was sleep deprived and full of worry, obviously the things he was saying were not what he really meant.

“You need to go to bed,” he said instead and ignored tony’s scowl, instead he looked up and saw a nurse and a doctor stepping in, Tony had the best pulled in to take care of his baby, and they had agreed, mostly for the recognition, and for the money, they would do their damndest to make sure the baby was okay and as normal as possible.

“I agree,” the doctor said, “You’ve been awake for a week straight, please listen to the captain and go to bed, perhaps do more research on other types of formula? We need him to eat something soon.”

Tony scowled, “Fine,” he grunted mostly because he was barely able to stay standing as it was, “But I’ve tried all I can find that’s organic, and I am not trying the generic shit, it should be banned from stores.”

“What other choice do you have?” the doctor asked, arching an eyebrow.

“I’ll find one,” the alpha muttered sticking his finger into his baby’s hand again and kissing the glass before moving to leave and Steve sighed as he followed after the grumpy and stretched thin man. They’d figure something out.

~

Clint managed to stay in bed for about two days before he just couldn't handle it any longer and decided to go to the bathroom on his own. Shockingly, he made it alright on the way there, but on the way back he almost fell, luckily he was hugging the wall just in case and he didn’t. He just fell against the wall, it was still awful, he was still in pain and he still felt like he was as big as a beached whale, he could see his stomach was smaller, not by as much as he’d hoped. He was going to have to work out hard to get his abs back.

He slept, ate and watched TV, (finally he was able to see that episode of Game of Thrones on his own couch, they’d come out with a new season while he’d been pregnant too, so that was okay), pretty much the same thing he’d done the past too many months. He still couldn’t see why he couldn’t have been pregnant here. His bed was ten times as comfortable as the one at the hospital, and he liked the food better. He didn’t get sick so often, still once in awhile, he figured that was just his stomach being dumb.

He was starting to get a little reckless with his walking, until Bruce caught him at it once and threatened to tie him down, or worse, have Hulk babysit him, which would be totally unfair, Hulk liked babies and would probably be mad at Clint for giving his away to it’s father. It was dirty pool, but Clint could respect a man who knew when to pull it.

He got visits from everyone, except Tony who Clint assumed was too busy with his kid to have time to, or so Clint thought, because he didn’t want to deal with Clint now that he no longer needed him, at least until not a week later and walked into the room, knocking on the door and looking a bit hesitant, like he thought Clint wouldn’t want to see him either.

“Hey,” Clint greeted, “...doing alright?” Because he really didn’t know what else to ask.

“Oh...yeah, hey, yeah...yeah I’m...yeah,” he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, Clint could tell he’d been doing it a lot, he must be stressed. That was to be expected when your kid was born at 28 weeks.

“I can see that,” he said vaguely amused, but he could also tell that this was not a social call, “What do you want Stark?”

Tony flinched, he was too tired to actually hide behind his walls, “...I...well...the baby, he’s...he’s doing okay, I mean...for the most part...he’s just...he’s not eating,” he said, “I’ve tried every kind of formula I can get my hands on...he just won’t take it...so I was…”

“You wanted me to...feed him?” Clint asked and Tony gave a jerky nodded, Clint sighed and rubbed his face with a hand, “I...I don’t want to, you know that…” but dammit all if Clint was feeling weak and Tony looked miserable, damn, “So...I guess I’ll look into milk pumps,” he said and Tony looked so utterly relieved Clint felt even worse.

“I sort of already have one,” Tony said with a little shrug, making Clint feel a little less guilty, “He needs to eat, he needs to get stable or he could be stuck in that damn tube for a lot longer and I-”

“It’s fine Tony, just bring me the thing, I’ll try and get some out for him soon, at least it’ll give me something else to do while I’m on my ass,” Clint rolled his eyes, he was unsurprised that Tony was already prepared, and had known about Clint not wanting to breastfeed.

“Thanks,” he said, “I...really, Clint, thanks. I know all of this is not what you wanted, you’re doing more than you need to...so...really, thanks.”

“It’s fine, Tony...it really is, you don’t need to thank me for anything, I’d prefer if you didn’t,” he said and Tony nodded, he pat Clint’s knee and then turned to go. A few minutes later Bruce came in holding a package, he put it on the bed and Clint must have been making a face when he saw the suction cups because Bruce also pat his knee.

“It will be uncomfortable, but...Tony is really grateful for this Clint, he’ll probably give you anything you want,” he said, but his face made it clear he knew Clint wouldn’t ask for anything.

Clint only sighed, “So...how do you know all of this stuff again?” he asked waving at the pumps Bruce was putting together with ease.

“Doctors Without Borders, I helped a lot of Omega’s give birth, and sometimes the babies don’t take to breastfeeding, so we were able to get some pumps -not as good as this one- to have them bottle fed instead, so I know how to use it,” he said, “I know how to do a lot of things I wasn’t technically trained for.”

“You’re pretty awesome you know that, Banner?” Clint asked smiling and Bruce chuckled.

“I guess I’m alright,” he agreed, mostly because he knew Clint would argue and Clint shook his head knowing that, “Okay, it’s all set, take off your shirt,” he instructed and Clint did, it was bit difficult with the pain in his back, but he managed. Bruce frowned a bit at his paunch, and Clint wondered if it was really that bad, but he didn’t say anything.

“Are your nipples sensitive?” he asked and Clint nodded, they were, they had been since the baby was born, “Good,” Bruce said, “That means you should be able to produce some soon, it’ll take a few times to get it to really start flowing, but eventually you’ll just be able to pump every few hours and it’ll be enough.”

“Alright…” Clint sighed, every few hours? That meant no solid sleep, he’d almost gotten used to it, the baby had let him sleep for the most part, not much movement, which he supposed was odd, but he didn’t think about it, nor did anyone else, apparently.

Bruce handed the pump over and Clint made more faces as he had to fix it to his nipple, “Uhg...uncomfortable? This is just plain weird,” he muttered as he did it and it started up and Bruce smiled softly, not going to argue, because it was a little weird but it was exactly what the baby needed. Bruce didn’t know Clint’s whole story, he could guess, but he wasn’t going to hold his decision against him.

Clint knew this was going to more or less make him more involved and he hoped Tony would ween the kid off at six months, maybe then he could leave for a little while, he needed a break, and not one where he was just in a room and they were a few floors down. He needed miles.

But he couldn’t stop now, he did the pumping even if it did feel really weird, it took about a day before milk actually started coming out finally, and then another day for it to be consistent. According to Bruce the baby liked the breast milk a whole lot better than the formula and was actually starting to eat, that was good, a little harder for Clint to deal with because he was now most certainly involved, but he would live.

This would be hard...but he would live, maybe not without a few more emotional scars but hey, what was one more on a lifetime full?

~

When the bottles started appearing, Tony thought he might cry, but that could also be the sleep deprivation when his baby finally started to eat, he actually did cry, a little, a tiny bit.

Tony also was very grateful to Steve who seemed to be taking on the primary Alpha status and protecting everyone and muscling them into things that Bruce couldn’t, which was saying something because when Bruce threatened Hulk on them they did what he said, except Tony because he was an idiot. Probably why he fit in so well.

But so far, things were finally looking up.

Mostly.

~

Clint was still beyond stubborn, of course, and this included him trying to get to the kitchen on his own at 3 am, he was making food for a kid, so he needed to eat more himself so he was hungry almost all the time, and he couldn’t wake up someone else to just get him food, so he’d gone by himself.

He’d made it there okay, he had to sit down on one of the chairs to catch his breath however because it felt like a lot of effort, he still felt like he was carrying a baby too, and that was just annoying.

He was breathing really heavily by the time he made it to the chair, and feeling somewhat faint, which was a real pain, he did not want to swoon, why was his body still fighting him? He thought breastfeeding was supposed to help you lose weight too, and he was pretty sure he was getting bigger, and it hurt more, actually it really hurt right now.

He grunted, rubbing at his face, he clutched at the chair so he didn’t fall off, he was pretty sure he was just hungry.

“Clint? What are you doing in here?” Clint heard a voice, it was Steve, oh good, Steve was good, he was safe, “Clint? Shit, Clint!”

Clint hadn’t realized he had tilted to the side about to fall off the chair only for Steve to catch him at the last second and preventing him from falling to the floor, “Steve…” he muttered and felt a hand on his face, then Steve was barking up at JARVIS to get Bruce.

Clint passed out a few seconds after that, wondering why the fuck this was still happening.

~

“...don’t know, he was at the table and he just started swaying so I came over to him and caught him just in time.”

“It’s a good thing you were there, if he’d fallen to the floor he could have been injured pretty badly since he’s still recovering.”

“Glad I could do something right,” Steve said, it was Steve.

“You haven’t done anything wrong at all, you know that,” Bruce, he was the other speaker, Clint realized, “He should-”

Clint groaned, he’d meant to say something, but he hadn’t gotten that far.

“Clint,” Bruce said and Clint felt a hand on his face he opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was Bruce hovering over him the second thing he saw was the ceiling, he was in the medbay, uhg.

“What...happened?” he croaked, wanting to sit up, but Bruce kept him down.

“You passed out, you were only out for about ten minutes, we have you on some IVs, your hormone levels were...off,” he said and Clint looked at him then glanced at Steve who looked...embarrassed? Ashamed?

“What is it? What happened?” he demanded and Bruce sighed.

“We did a blood test and it was...well surprising so we had to do an ultrasound, and well…” he put his hand on Clint’s, “You’re still pregnant, Clint.”

Clint blinked and stared at Bruce, “I’m sorry, it sounded like you said I was still pregnant, but I’m pretty sure I already gave birth.”

Bruce glanced at Steve, and the other man came over he looked pretty awkward, “Yeah, yeah...you did, but um...it looks like there was another baby hiding behind it’s brother and wasn’t ready to come out just yet, they couldn’t see it on the first ultrasound because of whatever was done…” Steve explained gently, “I’m sorry, it looks like you still have about a month and a half left…”

“Fuck my life,” Clint groaned throwing his arm over his face, no wonder he still felt pregnant, he was, “Great, just...fucking fantastic.”

“It’s okay...Clint if you wanted-”

“No, I get the whole drill now, I’ll just fucking deal, I won’t be happy about it, but I will deal,” he said then gave Steve a crooked but humorless smile, “It’ll be just our luck if the next one is yours huh? It’d be a good thing, SHIELD only released the other one ‘cause it was Tony’s.”

“What do you mean?” Steve frowned.

“Well...for one, I don’t think we should trust SHIELD so much...cause they talked when they thought I was sleeping, saying how if it was yours, the baby would need to be taken for testing, you know, cause of the serum. I don’t...it was weird...” he muttered, trying to replay that conversation in his head, “Kinda...kinda like...the people who took me...not really caring I was there…”

Steve swallowed and nodded, “You think they infiltrated SHIELD to get to you?”

“I think they were in SHIELD before they took me…” Clint admitted. He’d had a lot of time to think about it, Tony had left the information they’d gathered on a tablet for him, Clint had really only glanced at it, completely uncaring at the time because he’d had bigger things to worry about, but now, h\e had actually considered it now that he was out of SHEILD Medical, “It took you guys months to find me...and SHIELD is the only place with comparable tech to Tony...I dunno Steve,” he sighed, “Don’t know if I’m the best person to ask about these things...try Nat, she’ll probably have better ideas about it than me.”

Steve nodded, “Okay...okay I’ll-” he swallowed again then his face hardened, going into ‘Captain Mode’ as Tony and Clint secretly called it, “I’ll look into it, you sit and do what you can,” he looked at Bruce who nodded.

Steve turned and left, Clint looked at Bruce, “So...why can’t we do ultrasounds, what did the assholes do to me?” He’d wondered before, but they had taken it when he was in his ‘panic’ mode, so he hadn’t really thought about it.

Bruce took a breath, obviously trying to deal with everything going on just like the rest of them, it was something else considering he usually seemed pretty unfazed by all proceedings.

“They weren’t sure at SHIELD, but I took a sample while you were unconscious and well...it seems like they put something in you to create a sort of blanket around your stomach, like they didn’t want anyone else knowing the truth, but that doesn’t make any sense, because they can’t see either, so I sent a sample down to Tony...he doesn’t sleep much these days anyway so...we’ll have a result soon enough,” he said, patting his knee again. Tony also needed a break from worrying about his kid, he could worry about Clint instead.

Clint sighed, “Yikes...okay so- oh shit...I need to make the kid food don’t I?”

Bruce looked surprised, maybe because he forgot, or because Clint was the one to remind him he didn’t know, but he nodded and left. Truth was, Clint’s chest was hurting like crazy which meant it was time to pump.

Clint slumped against the pillows again, he couldn’t believe that he was still pregnant, it was probably the worst thing to be besides dead.

He had to be stuck in bed, again, he had been walking for the past week and a half, maybe he could keep at it? He sure hoped so. But considering how he’d ended up back in bed, he figured Bruce would tie him down, or have Hulk sit on him.

He glanced at his arms and sighed at the IVs, it looked like there was a saline drip and more hormones, uhg.

He could handle a little longer, right? And it was probably Steve’s kid this time, Tony’s kid would be all out and take all the attention first, sounded like a Stark, and then of course Steve’s would be quiet and unobtrusive, typical. A baby each, so neither of them had to be disappointed.

He’d need to start making twice as much milk, blehg.

He thought it was very odd to have twins two months apart, assuming the second one carried out to full term and didn’t surprise him early like the first one.

He sort of felt like crying again, hell he was pregnant he was allowed to sob for no reason, totally within his rights.

He would too, but...he was still hungry.

“JARVIS?”

“Yes, Agent Barton?”

“Can you ask Bruce to bring me down a sandwich too, with chips?”

“Of course, sir.”

Clint nodded and slumped against the pillows again, yeah, this time wouldn’t be so bad, he could probably get steve and Bruce to bring him all the junk food he wanted.

He could make the best of this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually had that dream, the one Clint had before he gave birth...yeah...it was not a fun dream. 
> 
> Also Baby was born in February. Tony may or may not call him 'lovebug' when no one is around. JARVIS knows. JARVIS has it recorded and hidden away to use for later. ;P
> 
> Also just a reminder that Clint is being quite stubborn because he's a pigheaded dummy, that we adore, he will come around, I promise, but he's just not in a good headspace which makes it hard.  
> Anywho! Leave some comments, tell me what you think! And please please please! If I forget to tag something TELL ME! 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

Steve found Natasha in the gym, it was one of three places she usually was these days, along with her own apartment or with Clint, she was however in the gym, according to JARVIS.

She was in the middle of a set when he approached but he let her finish before he spoke, or rather before she did.

“What can I do for you, Captain?” she asked, grabbing a towel and wiping her face of sweat. That was a little odd for Steve because Natasha always kept herself ‘neutral’ in the Tower, which meant she didn’t have a scent and it was a little disconcerting since everyone else had a distinctive smell. Steve could suppress his own alpha scent sure, but it was still very obvious he was an alpha, he’d always been one, even when he’d been sick. Ruts had been not so much fun, most of the time...he’d had help sometimes but…. He shook his head, no need to dwell on the past, right now they had something more important to discuss.

“What do you know about SHIELD and what was going on with Clint?” he asked and she cocked her head to the side then moved to go grab her water bottle, she took a long drink then turned back to Steve.

“You were talking to Clint about it?”

Steve nodded, she sighed, “I have been looking into it and so far things have been...difficult, things do seem a little off with the medical personnel when I looked at their files, I am a very skilled hacker, but whoever set them up is just a little bit better than me, I would ask Tony, but he’s otherwise occupied.”

“What do you suggest we do?” Steve asked and Natasha took another sip of water.

“Clint will want to be involved, I know him, he’s distracted right now, which likely has to do with recovering but he’ll need closure, once he’s better he’s going to help, so we should just get all the information we can now, send it to Fury when the chance arises.”

“Clint is going to be out of comission for a little while longer…” Steve said biting his lip he coughed when Natasha arched an eyebrow, “Um...turns out he’s still pregnant.”

“Oh, I’m sure he wasn’t too pleased with that,” she said evenly, and Steve shook his head.

“No...but he said he was going to deal,” Steve sighed, “I wish there was something more I could do for him.”

Natasha gave him a small smile, “He’s too stubborn to accept help, but I’m sure he appreciates the thought. I’ll have JARVIS send you the information I’ve gathered, I’m going to go shower.”

Steve nodded and watched her go. He knew things were not going to be simple or easy from here on out.

But the pack would get through it, he was sure.  
  


~

“You’re pregnant again?” Natasha asked, voice flat, making him twitch, he hadn’t heard her come in he was too caught up in a book series Bruce had recommended about teenage demigods, it was fun, he’d really like to be a Hunter of Artemis, he’d have to be a full blown Omega which was a hard thing to be, but still cool idea. And thinking about that had caused him to slack enough Natasha could sneak up on him, that was bad, he was getting lazy.

“Holy shit, Nat!” he huffed out a breath, “Not again, just still, the first one revealed the presence of another one when it left.”

She sighed and sat on the end of the bed, “How are you feeling?” she asked and she meant how did he feel about the whole thing.

“Dunno...resigned I guess, I mean it’s only fair right? One for each of them,” he replied, “And...exactly what the assholes wanted, you know? So...I’m not even surprised.”

Natasha squeezed his leg, “You’re not with them anymore, everything will turn out alright.”

“Yeah, I know,” he said, but looked up when Bruce came in the room.

“So...Tony finished looking at the sample I gave him,” he said and Clint knew it probably wasn’t good news considering the look on Bruce’s face.

“Yeah?” he prompted anyway, because he still needed to know.

“It would appear that the barrier was caused by nanobots in your bloodstream creating a sort of shield and they were only activated once you were taken away from a transmitter that was in the room with you,” Bruce explained. “We think they did it so no one else could steal you away, but they weren’t thinking about Tony in that.”

“Oh…great. So...how exactly will you be getting them out?”

“We haven’t figured it out yet, but Tony is thinking some of his nanobots will help,” Bruce said and Clint snorted.

“Fight bots with bots, great.” He sighed, “Fine, whatever, as long as I can get my abs back after this.” He said poking at his belly.

“So concerned with your looks,” Natasha teased.

“I know I’m a vain bastard,” Clint replied with a little smirk.

“As long as you’re healthy is all I care about,” Bruce commented and Clint pouted.

“What you don’t think I’m sexy, Doc’?” he asked, fluttering his eyelashes. Bruce just rolled his eyes and finished before leaving. Clint grabbed the milk pumps because it was about that time, he made a face at Natasha.

“Don’t watch, it’s weird,” he said and she snorted and made no effort to look away, she was a good friend like that.

He sighed and did what he had to, he was pumping about every four hours, according to Bruce once the other baby would come he’d have to do it about every two, and that just sucked. but he would do it and hope Steve’s spawn liked formula.

They still had a while for Steve to prepare, Clint was sure he wanted the nursery on his floor to be perfect.

Clint had told himself he would survive.

But he was actually quite sure he was going to go insane. Again.

~

Tony was overworking himself, but that was nothing new, luckily Steve was there to put a stop to it when necessary. Steve overdid it in the gym from time to time, but he was a supersoldier, he would be fine. Tony not so much.

He was watching the baby who was progressing at a perfectly fine rate according to the doctors, and he was looking into the nanobot problem. Which really wasn’t that bad once he’d found one in Clint’s bloodstream they were quite similar to the bugs which Tony had also dissected, so he knew exactly how to program his own nanobots to eradicate them, it just wasn’t safe to do it until after Clint had given birth to the second baby, which Steve somehow knew was his, just as Tony had known he’d had one. It was definitely an instinct, Steve was very grateful that they were no longer at SHIELD and that the doctors Tony had for his son were also qualified to help Clint now as well and they were completely separate from SHIELD.

Which reminded him, he should probably tell Tony what was going on.

“You remember how we both knew the baby was ours?” Steve asked, making Tony jump and then glare at the taller man.

“Yeah, but you were wrong, he’s mine.” He might have been a bit possessive, but Steve didn’t blame him.

“I wasn’t,” Steve said and Tony arched an incredulous eyebrow, “Clint is still pregnant.”

That got a reaction, Tony spluttered, “What?!”

“Yep, apparently my baby was hiding behind yours.”

“So...wow,” Tony blinked, “That’s why he hasn’t come down to my shop to get the nanobots out...huh.”

“Yeah, I think he’s pretty irritated actually,” Steve sighed and Tony pat his arm reassuringly.

“Don’t worry, that’s just hormones, I think he’ll come around eventually, he’s making food, that’s a step in the right direction.”

“Or it’ll just make him more distant,” Steve pointed out, Tony flapped his hand.

“I’m sure he’ll eventually just get tired of all the extra work and just find a way to not have to do so much, it’ll be okay, and then we can actually you know...be a real pack.”

Steve glanced at Tony, he knew that feeling, he was feeling the same way, but he was glad Tony was better, he was a lot less stressed now that the baby was out of the red zone, but he still needed a lot of special attention, it was possible he would have breathing problems, but Steve knew all about those, he’d help him out if Tony wanted him to.

He was also a bit worried about his own unborn baby, he had absolutely no idea what to expect, would they have the serum? Or would they have the same problems he did before the serum? Either or it was a bit worrying, he just hoped Clint’s genes were more dominant and healthier.

There was nothing to do but wait at this point.

~

Clint spent the next several weeks cooped up in his room, it was maybe only a little bit slightly better than being cooped up in a hospital room in SHIELD medical. He still had his flatscreen TV which was better than the tablet he had before, he was able to watch all of his Game of Thrones, well...most of it. Natasha had warned him about the Red Wedding and well he was a stubborn idiot…. Clint had barely made it to the bathroom in time. It was probably the worst possible thing to watch while in his condition.

He stuck to good wholesome shows after that, or at least, less bloody ones. He’d made it through all of Sherlock and he would admit that the homoerotic undertones between the Alphas’ Sherlock and Watson was absolutely hilarious.

He watched pretty much every Disney movie ever because those had no blood, but goddammit he did not need to be caught crying over a damn robot. He still liked the movie.

He found a few shows he liked, Castle was a lot of fun, rewatching Friends, Psych was pretty great too, he would have to start doing that to people. Warehouse 13 was fun too, he liked mysteries, which was bad considering his whole life was a mystery disguised as an action movie.

He felt like his belly got bigger with each episode, however, according to Bruce he wasn’t, he was growing actually a little less than he should be because the baby was so used to sharing space it didn’t know what to do with all the extra. Clint didn’t know what to do with that, but he still felt fat, cooking shows didn’t help any either.

Cake Boss was probably the worst decision ever, he wanted cake and cannolis and pie and just every sweet thing to ever be made, he even talked Steve into going to get him something from the bakery, it was in New Jersey, just a hop skip and a jump from the Tower, Steve was the best person in the world and had gotten him a dozen cannolis and a whole mini cake just for him and the cake had purple icing and a little arrow on it, turned out they were Avenger’s fans and were more than happy to give Hawkeye his own cake.

Clint had been almost tempted to kiss Steve when he’d come in with the boxes, but he restrained himself, he didn’t want Steve to drop the boxes either.

He was munching away on his cannolis when he felt the first contraction, “Oh damn…” he grumbled, then glared at his belly, “Do I at least have time to finish my cake?” He felt a twinge and took that as a no.

He sighed, “JARVIS can you alert Bruce and Steve and Nat please? I’m having contractions,” he said, not at all thrilled.

“Of course Agent Barton.” There was a short pause, “Doctor Banner wants you to count beats between each one,” the AI replied. Clint grumbled.

“He would,” he sighed and then cringed when another one hit, he started counting anyway.

He was at fourteen when Natasha came in through the vent, and fifteen when Steve burst through the door, out of breath. Natasha slipped onto the bed and just watched him.

“That was fast,” Clint commented, “Breath, Steve,” he added when he saw the man slump against the door, panting, he’d obviously run up the stairs.

“You were joking?” he asked and Clint arched an eyebrow.

“No, I’m having contractions, which means we could be here for hours, I just thought you should know,” he replied and Steve flushed a bit.

“Oh...right...sorry, I was...overeager,” he muttered and Clint smirked at him.

“Aaaaah you’re cute, you’re forgiven,” he smirked wider when Steve flushed more.

“Stop teasing him, Clint,” Natasha said, sliding up onto the bed and taking his hand just in time for the next contraction to hit. He let a breath out before continuing on.

“My bad, I feel I deserve it, I’m gonna be pushing his spawn out of me after hours of pain, I think I get a break,” he said grinning at Steve who shook his head and came to stand at the foot of the bed.

“Just this once,” Steve replied, teasing and Clint beamed at him just as another contraction hit.

“Uuuuhg, this is going to get old really fast,” he groaned, noticing Bruce slipping into the room too, “Bruuuuce-”

“Sorry, no painkillers for you, you’ll be able to handle it,” Bruce said and Clint made a face at him.

“How do you know I’ll be able to handle it?” he pouted.

“Because you always refuse medical attention and drugs every time you get hurt, and you don’t need any for this, the second will be easier, probably,” Bruce replied evenly.

“Probably?” Clint asked, dubious.

“Probably, no way to be sure, but aside from that we don’t want to give you any considering all the drugs you were on before.” Bruce said back, not looking up, instead setting everything up so Clint could give birth right there in his bed. Yuck, he’d need new sheets.

“Great, I’ll just scream for the rest of the night,” he sighed and Natasha pinched him, not hard, but it made him shut up, he might have been overdoing it, just a bit.

“Mhmm, how are your counts?” Bruce asked and Clint had to actually count now.

“Um...25 counts,” he said and Bruce’s smile was not reassuring, they were going to be here for way too long.

Clint ended up not being wrong, he was in labor for close to 20 hours, the first one had seemed to take less only because he’d slept through the majority of the contractions -used to sleeping in pain apparently- he was even able to pump twice for Tony’s spawn before the pain got too bad, Tony did stay for a few moments to make sure things were okay before he went off to take care of his kid, wishing Steve good luck.

Clint vaguely wondered as he was pushing a head out of his body how Tony had known the first one was his baby and how Steve knew the second was his, and in the beginning they had known that it was theirs...maybe it was an alpha thing, he figured it probably was.

He didn’t dwell on it, as soon enough it was too painful to really put thought into anything except breathing.

And then a few excruciating pushes later, Steve had his kid and Clint was free. It didn’t feel like it. Instead he felt even more tied down than before.

“Congratulations, it’s a girl,” Bruce said smiling, Steve’s face was so alive with joy Clint felt proud, for just a moment, but he quashed it down. He wasn’t allowed to have that. He also wasn’t allowed to feel regret that he wasn’t able to hold the baby, she was crying so softly, and she had this little tuft of blonde hair on her head-

No, jesus hormones were the worst, he was going to need to leave sooner rather than later, distance and perspective. That was what he needed to sort himself out.

Natasha seemed to get he was having weird thoughts so she pat his hand, the one that had squeezed hers through the whole birthing process in support.

She stayed with him until Bruce announced he was fine as was the baby, except for her being a little small for her age, but it would probably be good to get an expert opinion from the doctors Tony hired. But Clint was good, he was now completely baby free, that was a relief, he really didn’t want to be pregnant more, that would suck. Not that he would, the baby was at the nine month marker, so no more babies were possible. And he was going to get the nanobots out of his system, and if the ones Tony set on him maybe helped repair some of his hurt tissue and spine, well it was maybe a little bit of a thank you for not killing his kid.

Clint was very glad. He was so ready to be a Beta again, except he still had to take the hormones to breastfeed. Uhg.

Once he was settled and had some more milk pumped he went to sleep, utterly exhausted, but he was done. He didn’t have to do anything anymore.

He hated that he felt faintly disappointed.

~

A few weeks later it turned out that the rumor that losing baby weight while breastfeeding was totally true, he was able to lose it all after he started working out, and with no baby pressing on his spine he was able to walk without pain which was great. He still needed some physical therapy as having two babies resting on your spine was not good for the human body to begin with, but he was making really great progress. It was really great, except he still felt off.

He was also restricted to only an hour a day of archery as it affected the muscles next to the mammary glands producing the milk for the babies. He was going to have to keep taking the hormones too, which sucked. But it was only every four weeks, because his body was holding onto them and it wasn’t necessary to have as much for the milk.

Steve had tried the formula route too, but she wouldn’t have it, only wanting the milk, turned out it tasted like whipped cream, Clint didn’t blame the kids really. Whipped cream was delicious.

He made a lot during the day and it was still really freaking weird, but it was just normal at this point, he ate breakfast, pumped, worked out, pumped, did archery, pumped, watched tv and pumped at the same time, slept, pumped. It was crazy. He had a routine, and things were just going as they went, he could pretend like nothing was different for a few hours each day, and then his chest would start hurting, demanding to be pumped, boo.

The boy was almost three months and the girl one month when things took a turn, and one that was not for the better, at least, that was what Clint thought.

The girl had been tiny when she was born, 3 pounds 7 ounces, the boy had been a bit bigger, 3 pounds 9 ounces despite being a preemie, the boy was perfectly healthy now, completely okay, none of the possible side effects had happened to him except they thought he might be prone to breathing troubles as he grew, which in the end was extremely lucky. The girl was okay too, but Steve feared she may have gotten some of his pre-serum issues, anemia for one, and it didn’t help that she was being somewhat picky, not liking feeding from a bottle, and as it turned out, so was the boy quite suddenly, they had done okay at first, but now they seemed to be reading each other and were both in agreement. They didn’t like bottle feeding.

So when Tony and Steve came to Clint both looking hesitant and unsure and desperate Clint knew what they wanted. He also knew he wasn’t going to do it.

“Sorry, I just don’t think it’s a good idea, they’ll get over it,” he said not even bothering to look at the kids that were in each alpha’s arms.

“Clint...at least give it a try, it’ll probably be a lot less uncomfortable than the pump,” Tony said, and Clint would deny that the alpha was pleading, he wasn’t going to do it, no matter what.

“I’m not comfortable with the idea at all, so...I doubt it,” Clint replied flapping his hand, “Bottles or nothing.”

“You’d let them starve?” Steve was clearly skeptical. Clint frowned, because he wasn’t going to let them guilt him into it either.

“Uh no, I’ll still pump, I agreed to that, but nothing else, the rest is up to you, they’re yours, I didn’t want them to begin with,” he replied turning around and waving dismissively at them as he walked away.

“I didn’t think- god you really are heartless,” Tony said sounding disgusted, and Clint snorted, his ‘SHIELD Agent’ mask slipping into place.

“You realize I used to kill people for a living, right?” he asked back, “So, sure, heartless works.”

“Clint,” Steve said much more gently, gesturing at Tony to calm down, “Please...we don’t even know if it’ll work, we just want you to try, if they don’t eat…”

“Not my problem. I’m sorry, Cap, but I’m not gonna do it. That’s just not what I signed up for, I agreed to have them for you, I don’t know why you keep asking for more,” he said already to the elevator, stepping in.  
“Christ,” he heard Tony hiss, “If I had known what a fucking monster he was-”

“Tony,” Steve warned.

“No, Steve, these kids are half him, I can’t believe he would say that about his own kids! He’s worse than my asshole of a father!”

Clint didn’t hear anymore after that as the doors closed, but that was also when Clint slumped against the wall in a brief moment of overwhelming pain, but only for a second, he had to keep strong, he didn’t need to think how he was worse than his own abusive father. Tony was right, he was a monster. He didn’t need to be anywhere near those kids.

It was about time Tony and Steve realized that.

~

Clint made his best efforts to avoid them now every chance he could, leaving the room he knew they were in and generally just not going where he knew they went, he still pumped and left the bottles in the kitchen, but otherwise he really had no contact with anyone in the Tower except Natasha, he stopped coming to help Bruce in the kitchen, he didn’t even talk to Thor, and Tony and Steve were always with their babies, Clint couldn’t be around them. Not even for a moment.

Unfortunately he was still exhausted all the time and accidentally fell asleep on the couch on the communal floor, he’d just had a moment of dizziness and sat down, he was meant to get up the moment he felt better, but he was just so tired, he fell asleep right there. It was right near the island he usually left the milk on in the kitchen, but far enough away he didn’t hear anything at first.

Steve was there trying to get his baby to eat, gently coaxing and nearly crying his pleas for her to eat, the soft cries of a baby in need were what really woke Clint up.

“Come on, sweetheart, just a little, please?” Steve begged softly, only for there to be a warble in reply, “It’s okay, you’re hungry you just gotta eat,” he said and dammit all if he didn’t sound desperate. It went on for several minutes just like that, the baby crying and Steve trying to coax her into feeding from the bottle.

Clint couldn’t listen to it, not for long, the cries, Steve’s begging, it was driving him crazy, and he knew he was making a mistake, but he did it anyway.

He sat up with a grunted swear and then moved to the island where Steve was, he looked surprised, obviously having had no idea Clint was there, he opened his mouth but Clint held up a hand.

“Fine,” he said, and it probably wasn’t reassuring as he didn’t look at all happy about it but he held out his arms, “I’ll do it, just stop freaking begging, she can’t understand you anyway.”

Steve was probably too in shock to say anything else and to really think about handing her over, Clint took her, managing to keep a straight face and not looking down at the baby still warbling in his arms, he turned around and started walking away. That got a reaction.

“Where are you going?” Steve asked, maybe only panicking a little. He’d been around his baby since the moment she was born, never even in a different room yet.

“The bedroom, what you thought you were gonna watch? Gross, Rogers,” Clint snorted and made it to the spare room on the communal floor with Steve following behind like an insecure puppy, “JARVIS will be monitoring everything so calm your tits,” he grumbled.

“I will be be able to keep you up to date, Captain,” the AI replied.

“See? No worries, now calm down,” Clint said then closed the door in Steve’s face.

Clint took a deep breath and then looked down at the squirming little bundle in his arms, he really wished he could have gone without this moment because it was really what cemented the fact in his mind that he was awful, and not meant for this. He didn’t deserve it.

She was beautiful.

Tiny little hands balled up into fists as they waved about, little cheeks flushed, eyes pinched tight, a little tuft of dirty blonde hair on her head, she was absolutely gorgeous.

Clint had to swallow hard to keep his emotions at bay, he took a deep breath and then moved to the bed, setting her down gently to take off his shirt, then he sat up against the headboard, he lifted her up again and then did what he figured was what you were supposed to do, hold her mouth to the nipple and let her do the rest.

It seemed to be enough, once she figured out that that was what was going on, she latched on and started to suck, Clint let out a little squeak when she did, it didn’t take long after that before she was sucking deeply and getting what she wanted, it was still a little weird, sort of tingly but it was nowhere near as bad as the pump.

She sucked greedily and Clint was mesmerized by it. She was so amazing, so tiny still and that was Steve’s genes at play he was sure, somehow the serum hadn’t affected her. She was tiny and a little sickly, but not terribly so, nowhere near the level Steve had been, probably thanks to Clint’s influence. That was a bit of a relief.

But god she was so fragile looking and Clint didn't know how Steve did it. He had held her for five minutes and wanted to protect her from the world.

He couldn’t believe he wanted to end her life before it started.

The first tear fell on his hand, the second on her cheek.

“Oh god…” he whispered, “I’m so sorry…I’m sorry baby, I’m sorry,” he sobbed and all he could do was whisper apologies to a little girl who didn’t know what they meant yet, and was still too little to pick up on the fact that her mother was distressed, she fell asleep in Clint’s arms, feeling safe warm and well fed once she was satisfied and he just cried, apologizing every few breaths.

He should have taken them as the gifts they were, two babies with strong powerful alphas who were loving and had them as their top priorities. So many omegas never got that. And he was a lowly Beta and he did. There was so much wrong with him he didn’t know where to start to fix it.

Clint should have been involved the whole time. He should have helped plan a joint nursery, he should have helped pick out their names- god he didn’t know their names! He was awful, he was a monster, he was so much worse than his own father.

In trying too hard not to be him, he’d gotten to the point he was worse. That just brought on a bout of more tears he that he couldn’t stop.

It took him longer than he wanted to to get himself together, but he managed, taking quiet, gasping breaths to get himself to stop sobbing.

“Agent Barton, are you in need of assistance?” JARVIS asked, sounding concerned, for an AI anyway.

“N-no...I’m fine, I just need a minute, tell Steve everything is fine, she ate…she’s sleeping now,” he said, “I’ll be out in a minute,” he took another deep breath and calmed himself down by sheer force of will.

He stood, not bothering to put his shirt back on just yet he had a feeling he would need to take it right back off anyway. He held her close, her little head resting against his chest listening to his heartbeat he opened the door and was unsurprised to find Tony there holding his son, and frowning slightly.

Clint handed Steve his daughter back, then he looked at Tony and held his hands out, Tony kept frowning, Clint only had to arch an eyebrow before Tony sighed and handed over his own fussy and hungry baby.

Clint turned and headed back into the room closing the door without a word, hearing Tony’s ‘Hey!’, he snorted and sat on the bed again.

“JARVIS tell Tony he’s a pervert,” he said, scooting back to sit against the headboard once more.

“He did not have a suitable reply, Agent Barton,” JARVIS replied and Clint grinned faintly.

“Good,” he sighed and then looked down again, feeling a whole new wave of emotions come crashing down on him.

The baby boy was just as beautiful as his sister.

Dark brown hair, and blue eyes, the same face shape as her, but there were definitely marks of Tony in his nose and mouth, he was so gorgeous.

Clint took a breath and guided him to his other nipple, the same tingly sensation came after he latched, god it was just so weird, at least it didn’t hurt as bad as the pump, he would be forever grateful for that, that’s all he had to say on the matter.

He did the same thing with the little boy, who was heavier than his sister, due to the fact that he was two months older, he was perfect too, no one would know he was two months too soon.

He didn’t care, he was perfect and Clint was sorry, so fucking sorry he hadn’t been there, he hadn’t loved him when he should have. That brought on another wave of whispered apologies and tears.

He held him, letting him sleep in his arms for a little while so he could calm down again. He set him down on the bed and then put his shirt on this time, then lifted him back up, gentle, his hands knew exactly where to hold him, instinct. His body knew what to do, and even his heart, the only problem was his mind.

He left the room and was even more unsurprised to find Tony a foot away, looking about ready to panic, but he took the baby only when Clint handed him over.

And then he noticed Clint’s face, and Clint realized he probably had tear tracks and red puffy eyes, “You okay?” Tony asked.

“I’m fine,” Clint said turning and flapping his hand at them, “I’m going to go take a nap, just tell me when they’re hungry again,” he said, his voice rough and exhausted, he turned and shuffled away, “It’s fine.”

He missed the looks Steve and Tony shared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FEEEEELS.   
> You're welcome.
> 
> Baby girl was born in April.
> 
> Thoughts and what not if you please! :D


	7. Chapter 7

Clint was curled up in his bed, the covers over his head when Natasha came in and set her hand on his shoulder, she knew he hadn’t been asleep.

She didn’t say anything only kept her hand there, Clint sighed and turned over, pulling the covers down, and then she could see he’d been crying some more. God he hated crying, he’d never cried this much before, not even as a kid.

“They sent me up to check on you, but it was in as discreet a manner as they could handle,” she smiled, running her fingers through his hair. So they’d asked her to and then told her not to tell him they’d asked.

“Great,” he sighed, “I’m fine,” he muttered, even if he knew that wasn’t going to fly.

“Sure,” she said, sounding mildly amused, “You should maybe talk to them?” It wasn’t actually a suggestion, or a request.

“About what?” he asked stubbornly, but he would be an idiot to think she hadn’t figured him all out yet.

“Clint,” she said, this time in exasperation, “You can’t go on like this, you’ll tear yourself apart. You’ve already torn yourself from everyone else, you’d probably not feel as shitty as you do now if you could bring yourself to snuggle up to Thor and play video games, or help Bruce in the kitchen, or even snuggle up to the alphas who fathered your children, I’m sure they wouldn’t mind.”

“I can’t do that,” he whispered, “I don’t-”

“Don’t start on ‘deserving’. You’re hiding your true feelings behind denial and angst and it’s annoying,” she said, “You need to talk to them about what’s going on inside your head. You need to explain what’s going on and they need to explain themselves too they have their reasons even if they were being dumb, but it’s awful watching this. It has gone on long enough, you’re all walking on glass around each other. It’s affecting the rest of the pack and only you can fix it by telling us what’s going on. We’re worried. Everyone is waiting for you.”

Clint flinched, “That’s not fair-! Then I shouldn’t be in the pack! I can’t stand to do this! To Tony and Steve or to...to the kids- goddammit! I don’t even know their names!”

“Then ask, you dumbass,” Natasha said simply, “They’ll tell you, and then you can maybe try to get over this. You’re dwelling too long, I expected you to compartmentalize more...but I suppose that’s my fault, you do have a lot more to feel than I do usually.”

Clint glared at her, she smiled at him apologetically.

“Sorry, you are different, but that isn’t bad. I know you’re scared...but that’s just what it takes to be a good parent, if you take a moment to take a step back and look at things from a distance... you’d know Steve and Tony are scared too...they could use your help. There’s a reason babies are raised by more than one person. And you would be a good parent, you just need to let yourself get to the point you can be, if it’s something you think you want,” she brushed his cheek with her fingers and gave him a little smile. “Think about it.”

With that she left and Clint huffed against his pillows. Dammit, he’d wanted to sulk, but naturally his best friend had given him the slap in the back of the head he needed to get on with his life. If he had his way he’d be sulking for the rest of his life.

He took a deep breath and flopped back on the bed and decided some self reflection was needed. God he hated that, why did Natasha have to be a soviet trained assassin best friend who had trouble understanding feelings but still seemed to know what to say to make the change needed instead of the type of best friend that just told you what you wanted to hear?

Because he wasn’t a normal person either that was why.

He guessed that was a good place to start.

Why did he feel the way he felt?

Well, for one thing...he’d been used. Again. He’d gotten over Loki using him as a weapon, mostly. He could get over Hydra using him as an incubator. He knew it would be hard and take time, he would always have memories of feeling cornered and used, feelings of worry and maybe resentment all clumped up in his belly, of being used and helpless and ignored. That wasn’t something he was a stranger too, he usually just pushed it aside, compartmentalized it, like Natasha, but this time it was harder because he’d been pushed around by his pack. He did need to talk to the alphas, tell them that. It should help him recover, especially if he got to tell Tony to stop being a douchecanoe.  

But he also knew as a person he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he treated his children like this anymore. He couldn’t use it as an excuse to hate himself more than he already did. The babies were not at fault. He could accept that, and he was sure he could love them if just given time.

Losing control of his body was really not fun, that was really his biggest issue. His bodily autonomy was taken away and that was almost as bad as having his mind taken. But of course, that wasn’t the babies’ fault, or even Steve and Tony’s. He could accept that, Steve and Tony had been fucked over and surprised by this too.They weren’t at fault. It was the fault of those who had put him in that position.

He supposed he would maybe be more upset about some of the other things if he could remember them properly, but that whole ordeal was kind of like a dream, the more he thought about it the less he remembered. He just knew the feelings he had when he was experiencing them.

Fear, hopelessness, anger, used, hurt.

It was all more than he could handle and he’d withdrawn and avoided everything that could possibly make him feel that way again. And that included being around the others. It had been hard being around them and knowing he wasn’t what was expected of him. It didn’t really help that Steve and Tony were making that even more difficult. They had asked for more than he’d been willing to give, making him feel even more awful.

But clearly they had their own reasons which he apparently needed to talk to them about too. And that sucked. He hated talking about feelings.

He should also probably talk to the others, apologize for being distant...they hadn’t deserved that, being abandoned and avoided while he was dealing with his shit. He could have at least told him that was why he was distant.

So...first step. Apologies. Second step, talk to the alphas...yeah, he’d save that for last.

~

First, and definitely easiest, was Thor. He didn’t have an inner beta, alpha or omega that needed to be mollified for having a pack member trying to abandon them, he just needed an apology from a friend.

“I am just pleased to see you no longer walking around like a dragur, my friend!” Thor boomed when Clint had said he was sorry for avoiding him, he proceeded to lift Clint up into a big hug.

“Um, thanks, I guess,” he had no idea what that was, but he had a vague idea it was close to an Asgardian zombie.

“But of course,” Thor set him down a relieved little smile on his face, “You are more than capable of many things, Clinton, you just need to put your mind to it.”

“Oh...well...thanks,” he said, and Thor pat his back, feeling confused.

“I will see you tomorrow for our continued journeys on the video gaming! The tale of the princess Zelda is most enthralling,” Thor said, nodding.

Clint chuckled weakly, “Whatever you want, buddy,” he said and Thor beamed then waved and walked away, maybe a little more cheerfully than usual. Clint felt a bit boldened by that, Thor was good for things like that, maybe he could get through this.

Okay, next person, Bruce, he wouldn’t be too hard, not really, he never stayed mad for long, he said he was learning to let things go. But Clint was pretty sure that was him joking, you never really knew with him.

“I’m just glad to see you in a brighter mood,” Bruce said and Clint was pretty damn sure that’s exactly what Thor said, “But I appreciate your apology, it’s hard to see pack leave after just finding it. But, I did understand why, and I certainly don’t blame you. Oh you also might want to try apologizing to the Other Guy, I think he’s more upset because he doesn’t understand it all, but an apology would help,,” Bruce replied, handing Clint an onion to chop.

“Oh...um...right,” Clint rubbed the back of his head before getting at the onion, trying to think of when the best time that would be but Bruce was looking at him expectantly, he wanted to do it now? Bruce nodded as if reading his mind. “Um...okay...hey...big guy?” Clint suddenly saw Bruce’s eyes flash green and was somewhat surprised there was nothing more than an arched eyebrow, like a question. Okay...so when had that happened?

“Yeah… um I wanted to apologize for...you know...being an ass and not being around you anymore, I really do like you, you’re a good friend,” he said, feeling really awkward, but when Bruce’s eyes went green again and he grunted, he figured the other guy got the message.

“Cupid stupid,” Hulk said, through Bruce and holy shit that was weird, not bad, just weird, “Hulk Cupid friend.”

Clint laughed softly in surprise and smiled, “Thanks buddy.”

Hulk grinned and then suddenly Bruce’s brown eyes were back, and he was smiling too, “Feel better?”

“Um...yeah, how or when did..?”

“Oh...yes, I forgot, yes, well...it just sort of...happened? Tony has been trying to get me to Hulk out- or he was, before the baby anyway, poking and prodding wanting to test out some of his Hulk Proof things, but I wouldn’t do it and he kept at it until the Hulk told him to stop or he’d poke and prod him while he was sleeping, as me, and...he’s just been coming out like that from time to time, he’s not- I’m not angry, more like a subtle grumpiness, so it’s not all the way, it just is. I think Hulk was just irritated Tony thought he could interrupt his naps whenever he wanted.”

“Huh,” Clint stared, “Well...alright then.”

Bruce laughed, “Yeah...it’s surprising, but he’s very calmed by the babies, he adores them.”

Clint offered him a half-hearted crooked grin, it didn’t reach his eyes yet, but he would get there. He just needed time.

Bruce squeezed his arm, “Don’t worry, we all know that this is hard for you,” he said gently, “You went through something awful and we could do nothing, we still can’t. You’re a part of the pack, so if Natasha hadn’t said something, I’m sure there would have been a giant snuggle fest in your future.”

Clint let out a short burst of laughter at that, the thought was ridiculous, but also really really awesome, he sort of really wanted that now. The idea of the whole pack together like that was very appealing, he supposed he needed to keep the pack together then, didn’t he?

Bruce was very pleased that he’d gotten that short laugh out of Clint, that was something to be considered a rare treat these days. Clint helped Bruce with dinner, he still had to think for the next stop. It took him a little while because it was going to be hard, he guessed he needed to get the alphas to understand how hard this was for him and then be open to hearing their side of things.

Steve and Tony, he’d originally planned to approach them separately but his plans never worked out anyway, he’d walked into the communal living room having been informed Steve was here, so Clint had gone to find him so they could talk. He figured he could handle them one at a time, and Tony would probably be more convinced to listen if he knew he had talked to Steve too.

He hadn’t expected to have to talk to them both at the same time.

He walked into the living room and didn’t see Steve, “Steve?” he called, because JARVIS said he was in here.

“I’m in here,” Steve called from the kitchen, Clint couldn’t see him from the living room so he assumed he was probably in the breakfast nook, which was a corner that wasn’t visible from the living room. It was a pain in the ass for Clint who liked being able to see everything. Oh well, he could bitch about it to Tony later, if he and Tony ever got to that point again.

He stepped into the room braced himself and inhaled to take a deep breath before he just let it all out.

“Okay so...my life has pretty much sucked the last year and I firstly want to tell you that I don’t blame you because it’s not your fault, but not having the chance to recover has made things really fucking hard and just being told that I just need to like the babies makes me not want to like them cause I’m oppositional but it also hurt because i did but it just didn’t feel right to me and that was hurting them  and that’s not fair to them and so you know that’s why I was being a pain, and on top of that you know I was sort of reliving the feeling of lack of control and you guys were kind of being assholes and that hurt more because you were my pack and you weren’t supposed to...oh.  Um...I...hi...Tony…” He went red, just now catching sight of the other Alpha right in the middle of his babbling rant.

Steve and Tony were sitting in the breakfast nook, Tony had his baby in a little bouncer on the table while Steve was holding his own, they were both sleeping which was a little bit of a relief, he didn’t know why. Maybe he didn’t want them to see him make a fool of himself.

“Well...that was...good to know,” Steve started, looking a bit wide eyed, “Okay...I guess we have some things to talk about.”

“Uh...uh...yeah,” Clint confirmed his mind now crapping out and losing all of the confidence he’d built up, “I um...also...um...wanted to...um ask…um...”

“Out with it, Katniss, we don’t have all day,” Tony grunted, he was clearly not pleased with Clint, which made Clint want to reconsider everything and flee the country. He was trying.

Steve gave Tony a look, but didn’t say anything to him yet, “What did you want to ask?” he asked calmly, and Clint honestly had no fucking idea. He’d had words to tell Steve and now that Tony was here he didn’t know what the hell to say.

“I...uh...well...um...what are their names?” he blurted, and that had been nowhere near what he’d meant to say, and he stared at them wide eyed, and awkward, hunched over himself and willing himself not to run away.

“Oh...um...well…” Steve started, obviously caught off guard again.

“I know...I’m pretty much the worst person alive to not know their names, but I just don’t know how to deal with this and it wasn’t really fair for me to have to, but I still needed to make them milk so that made me responsible and that was absolutely terrifying, and I just wanted to run away, but now I know that it won’t help me to do that, and that the babies are actually important to me even when I denied it, so I thought maybe I needed to actually try for them but there’s still so much shit to wade through and I don’t know what to do and I-...I don’t...” he babbled and then he trailed off when he realized his babbling was idiotic, especially considering how the two alphas were staring at him. “I’m just gonna go jump off the Tower now. Yup.”

“Okay, dramatic,” Tony said and he was up and had snagged Clint’s arm before he even realized it, then he was squished into the breakfast corner between Steve and Tony and the babies.

He was too flummoxed to say anything or try to move, instead he was just stuck there and then he realized he couldn’t move unless he wanted to crawl under the table, which would be humiliating.

“So,” Tony eyed him critically, like Clint was one of his robots that had malfunctioned, “You want to know their names?”

“Um….yes?” he replied close to a squeak, now completely beyond flummoxed and settled somewhere in anxiety town.

“Hmm,” Tony said then went to the little boy and lifted him gently out of his sleeper, he cradled his head so softly, and held him so lovingly, Clint didn’t think the actions belonged to the Tony he had known, and they didn’t, this was the Alpha Tony, father, carer and protector. It was...well it did funny things in his chest.

Of course what he wasn’t expecting was the baby suddenly shoved into his arms, Clint would have spluttered if he hadn’t been conscientious of waking him.

“This is my kid, and your kid, he wasn’t intentional and we didn’t ask, but he’s ours, and his middle name is Edwin, I’ve been calling him Eddie,” Tony said and Clint stared at the baby as Tony talked about him, just from the tone of voice alone Clint could tell Tony loved his kid to death.

“Wait, middle name?” Clint asked, eyebrows furrowed.

“And that little spoiled princess-” Tony pointed at the sleeping little girl in Steve’s arms, smirking.

Steve rolled his eyes and continued, “Her first name is Margaret, but I call her Maggie,” Steve said, “And she’s so not as spoiled as your little rascal,” Steve replied in a drawl.

“Please, you hold her all the time, she’s gonna get Steve sores, you know instead of bedsores,” Tony replied and Steve snorted in amusement, Clint just gaped at them.

Steve took sympathy on him and smiled, “She doesn’t have a middle name yet...and Eddie doesn’t really have a first name, because…”

“Because we were waiting for your stubborn ass to remove your head from it and come up with some,” Tony said, blunt and kind as always.

“That’s not- I don’t-” He opened and closed his mouth, unable to come up with words at all.

“You were an ass, yeah, we covered that,” Tony said smiling, maybe smirking a bit meanly.

“Tony,” Steve scolded, “He was not, stop that, he’d been through enough,” he insisted, and then he sighed, “I’m so sorry Clint, I knew this was hard on you...it wasn’t fair to ask so much of you...but...I guess we just let our instincts drive us too much and...and we didn’t acknowledge that that was a part of why you were running.”

Tony let out a huff of air and visibly deflated, he’d obviously been using his anger as a shield and couldn’t hold onto it anymore, “Yeah...yeah...what he said,” he rubbed his face, “I...guess it didn’t even occur to me to not expect you to just suddenly be all better and want to help raise your kid...that was unfair of me and callous. And...I’m sorry...also sorry for being an ass too. Like a really big ass, you had every right to distance yourself from all of this,” he waved his hand indicating, well of of it.

Clint blinked at the two of them owlishly.

“We should have left you to do what you needed to...but we didn’t, and we can’t apologize enough for that, it was wrong and pretty selfish of us,” Steve said with a sad smile, “You also have every right to take the time you need or distance to figure things out for yourself now, really.”

“We can’t promise not accidentally act like it again because we probably will...but we can apologize in advance,” Tony added, “We were assholes to you...way more than you were to us, you were more than right to refuse. And I just let my instincts drive me to being mad at you, I’ve been really worried about Eddie, he has asthma- because he was born early, it’s nothing bad...but I still worry about him, I’m a worry wart and I was taking it out on you, along with other feelings that I’d rather not talk about, but it wasn’t your fault. Nothing was.”

“Oh,” Clint said, “Um...I…”

“Really Clint...it’s okay, and if you want to take more time, I know we wouldn’t argue, we have no room to, we can try to get the babies on formula,” Tony said and glanced at Steve who nodded in agreement.

“Wow…” Clint muttered, blown away and feeling...well, better about the whole thing, he didn’t realized he’d needed those words, “Huh...well, yeah you were kinda pricks about the whole thing,” he replied, a small smirk playing at the corner of his lips, “But...thank you.” He offered them a crooked smile “And...I think...I think I want to try...I know I feel like I don’t deserve being a parent and I’m still a bit...unsettled about the babies...but...I would prefer to get over it than dwell on it for the rest of my life and also knowing I never tried and failed by default.”

“Well, you’ve got us whenever you need us, we’re here for you, we should have been there all along, but we’ll start now, together,” Tony said and Clint smiled in appreciation. He was terrified...but he could do this...he hoped.

“I couldn’t have said any better myself,” Steve smiled, “You’re almost at my level of cheesy.”

“Oh shut up, dad of the year,” Tony frownpouted.

“Thank you,” Steve said, smiling sweetly.

Clint blinked at them because it was so very strange to see them teasing each other, and getting along and being...domestic. It wasn’t bad it was just...something to get used to.

“Anyway,” Tony said with a cough, “Yeah, it’ll take some time...but we’ll work it out.”

“Clint,” Steve this time, Clint glanced up at him, still pretty out of it and sort of disbelieving that he was holding his son, his real son, not what he’d thought as a parasite, which made him feel sick thinking about now. No, this was the little boy he wanted to help raise and love. Steve scooted over a little and then set his own hand on Clint’s knee, he was able to hold Maggie with one arm easily, she was tiny.

“I know now you wanted to get away to protect yourself, I really do...but next time know that we are your pack...we’re here for you, that’s what packs are for, so next time you’re feeling bad...come to one of the pack, okay? We hate to see you so hurt, and we most definitely hate knowing we caused the hurt, so tell us, and we’ll do our best to change,” Steve said reassuring and sincere.

“I know…” Clint muttered but then shook his head, “No actually, I didn’t. I’ve never had a pack before, I’ve never...depended on people before, I...didn’t know how,” he admitted, staring down at the little boy - Eddie- still asleep in his arms.

“Jeez, Barton you’re more of a tragedy than I am,” Tony grunted, but he moved closer so he was leaning up against Clint and Clint didn’t even realize he’d tensed up until there was an alpha close and he relaxed on instinct, feeling protected and secure. Something he hadn’t felt in a long time, he’d been so used to feeling used and hopeless and alone.

“Yeah…” Clint muttered and Tony made a face he couldn’t see.

“You’re not supposed to agree- uhg, we got our work cut out for us, Cap,” Tony sighed, Steve let out a soft chuckle and then he was moving too, leaning up against Clint’s other side.

“Yeah, but that’s okay, cause we’re not alone,” Steve replied and Tony groaned.

“Good god, can you be any cornier?” Tony asked and Steve hummed.

“Probably, would you like me to try?” Steve asked sounding almost sincere.

“No, please don’t,” Tony deadpanned.

Clint let out a small watery laugh, because this was new, and this was weird but...it was also his. His pack. His children. His family. He hadn’t expected it, but he wasn’t going to let how it came to be hold him back to something he had wanted deep, deep down since he was a child. He could do this.

~

Clint jumped right into trying to be involved with the pack again, but he found that it was a lot harder than he’d expected, which he supposed he should have expected, but oh well. He was so used to avoiding everyone except for Natasha that he had to put a lot of effort into it, which only resulted in him being more exhausted. Working past your past sure was a pain and really not easy. But luckily, he wasn’t alone to do it.

Bruce would drag him into the kitchen for meals and have him help cook, Thor would always insist he would win the next game and pull Clint to the TV, Natasha would smirk at him every time she caught him doing those things too, the little shit she was, she was lucky he loved her.

He was also going to a therapist, something he had never liked, but he knew it would help, and so far it was, slowly but surely his once a week appointments were helping him do more self reflection and all that, it still sucked but, it helped him to realize that his feelings had never been wrong, he’d been justified in feeling the way he had, but he felt a little childish with how he’d handled himself, but that was his own deal, he knew as an assassin with emotional control, he could have handled himself more...professionally, but that was hard and in the past, nothing to do about it now. Oh well, but according to his therapist she’d been impressed by how he’d managed. He didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

And then there was Steve and Tony, they weren’t always together, but they were now a lot more than they used to be, as it turned out, the twins -because they were in fact twins- slept better when they were near one another. And that was mostly what they did at this age, especially Maggie, Eddie was awake for a lot more than she was, but sleep was mostly what they did, and ate. Clint was now the only one who could feed them and he was still a little embarrassed by it so he kept it in a bedroom and away from the others.

But at this point now whenever he came into a room with one of them he was handed a baby, just so the baby could get to know his scent, understand who he was, it was terrifying, but also really really thrilling. His babies would know him, they’d be able to just be aware of him the moment he came close, he couldn’t believe that.

It seemed that the Alphas were wanting to make up for pushing him so hard and for being certifiable jerks so they did the best they could in trying to put his feelings first, asking him if it was okay if they did things or reassuring that he was feeling okay, or if he needed some time to himself. It was both endearing and a bit stifling, he wasn’t used to being so coddled. He still wasn’t sure how he felt about it. But he did appreciate the effort. They also made sure he got to spend as much time with the babies as they did, but only so much that he could handle, so he wasn’t overwhelmed.

He had yet to think of names for them, he just called them Maggie and Eddie if he remembered to call them by name, usually it was baby girl or baby boy when he didn’t. He was getting there, slowly but surely he was getting there.

He was pretty shocked to discover that everyone was a lot more involved now that the babies were here, he’d seen all of the others hold one of the babies at one point, even Natasha, but she never did for very long, she wasn’t big on babies, she only took one if another person needed their hand free for a moment, but otherwise everyone was just a bit happier with them, and even more so with Clint around. They all seemed to be glad to have the whole pack back.

Clint was finding he was happier too, just looking at the babies was a wonder, Eddie was older so he was a little more active. Clint would be holding Maggie while Eddie was lying on a blanket on the ground, Tony sitting nearby and cooing at him and cheering whenever he found his foot. It was wonderful to be involved.

“You’re ridiculous, Stark,” Clint said laughing softly as Tony pretended to eat Eddie’s toes, it was incredibly endearing.

“I’m amazing you mean,” he replied making ooey gooey noises at the baby who let him see a tiny little smile in response, “Oooh, you like that do you baby?” He cooed and Clint laughed again, louder, causing Tony to turn because he hadn’t heard that sound in too long, but the joy was cut short when the Avengers Alarm went off.

“Aaaah, crap,” Tony sighed, “Jay, give me a run down?”

“It would appear there is an invasion happening in Central Park,” the AI said, “Some large unidentifiable reptilian creatures.”

“Oh boy,” Tony sighed, “Alright, alert the others, get the suit ready. Will the big guy be needed?”

“It might be advised, Sir,” JARVIS replied.

“Damn,” he sighed, “Alright call Pepper down please, if she’s in the building, Clint shouldn’t have to watch both of the babies alone-”

“Whoa, hey, what? I’m going with you,” Clint said, glaring at Tony and that made him stop and blink at the archer.

“Ah...no,” Tony said, “You can’t.”

“Why the hell not?” Clint demanded and then froze when Maggie gave a little distressed warble.

“That’s why, Merida,” Tony said, “And you’re still not one hundred percent, that’s why you haven’t been called for any other attacks-”

“There have been other attacks?!” Clint hissed keeping his voice down so as not to disturb the babies again.

“Clint, you’ve been out of comission for more than a year, we’ve had a lot of other battles...and some of them have been really hard without you, but we’ve made due, because risking you isn’t worth it,” he said and Clint went a bit red in the face from frustration and anger.  
“And what the hell about you? Why the hell should you or any of the others be worth risking?” Clint snapped back still keeping his voice down and gently rocking Maggie back to sleep.

“Yes,” Tony replied standing, “Because we’re superheroes, I know you’ll get back to the field soon, but...at least wait until you’re done breastfeeding, yeah? We wouldn’t be able to do anything if you were unable to do that, okay? So...just wait, I know you’re not the type to sit at home and wait...but...please, don’t do this for you,” Tony said and Clint scowled at him but slouched into the couch.

“Fine,” he said, not pleased, “But you owe me something, especially for not telling me any time before we had a call to assemble!”

“Well...I’m just surprised you didn’t notice,” Tony said shrugging, “That’s what you get for being distant,” he replied and Clint flipped him off but Tony would probably always be an ass.

Tony squeezed his shoulder and then headed out to the platform to get his suit on, Clint watched, glaring, and then squeaked when Eddie started crying.

“Oooh...oh n...oh shit, why do I have them both?” he whispered then looked at Maggie, she was out so he moved fast and put her in the little sleep bouncer, and then moved to Eddie and picked him up.

“Hey, heeey,” he cooed, awkward, now that he wasn’t totally secure with having one of their dad’s nearby, “You’re okay, daddy will be back,” he promised, “He better be back or I’ll kill him myself.”

He heaved a sigh and rocked Eddie to sleep and bounced Maggie gently to keep her sleeping and tried not to panic, because he had no freaking clue what was going on. But Steve had been in the gym and Bruce in his lab and Natasha was with Steve and Thor was off wooing Jane. Leaving Clint all alone.

“Tony?” a voice asked coming into the room, Clint looked up and saw Pepper Potts walking in wearing one of her put together and nice suits, she was one hell of a woman, a Beta and she took no shit from anyone, including Alphas, Clint sort of adored her.

She caught sight of Clint and looked surprised, “Clint, what are- oh,” she looked even more surprised to see him with the babies.

“Tony’s already gone off to the battle, I assume the others went in the quinjet already,” he grumbled.

“And they left you with...the babies?” she asked, she seemed hesitant. So she knew everything. Great.

“Well...they’re mine too, and they need to feed soon, so...you know, I stayed and...yeah,” he replied, trying not to sound defensive. He was trying to make his life right after having a monumentally bad experience change it, he was pretty sure he should get some benefit of the doubt here.

“I see,” Pepper said evenly, Clint tried not to scowl, “That’s good, Tony was becoming unbearable, he whined like a child himself about it you know.”

He glanced up at her, eyebrow arched, she smiled.

“He just wanted things to be perfect, I told him he was an idiot for expecting so much from you after everything you’ve been through, he’s so used to machines and their lack of feelings, I don’t think he knew what to do with you.”

“Uh-huh…” Clint said, still waiting for the other shoe to drop, Pepper sighed.

“You’re here now, and Tony didn’t tell me, it makes me wonder if that’s not what’s really bothering him,” she replied and Clint slouched.

“Great, I’m still doing something wrong.” He grumbled and Pepper waved her hands a bit.

“No, no that’s not what I meant, I just meant that I- no- he-” she let out a huff of breath, and Clint almost felt pleased that he’d gotten the most put together Beta on the planet flapping her hands about in a tizzy, he would feel pleased if he didn’t feel like shit instead.

Pepper took a deep breath then sat next to him, putting her hand on his knee gently, “I love Tony, you know that, he is my pack, along with Happy and Rhodey, but he’s found solidarity and a good pack in the Avengers, including you, and...now the possibility of a real family.”

Clint frowned, “What are you getting at Potts?”

“That you’re important to him,” she said, “That you are the mother of his child and he wants to get to know you, but it’s hard when you’re so…”

“Prickish?”

Pepper’s mouth quirked, “Introverted,” she said and Clint rolled his eyes.

“Sure,” he shrugged, “Your point?” he asked and she smiled.

“My point is maybe you and Tony and Steve should take a night to yourselves,” she said with a smile.

“Wait- what?” Clint gaped that had totally not been what he’d expected.

“Just think about it,” she said and he would have replied if the sudden mouthing at his clothed nipple hadn’t brought his attention elsewhere and caused him to squeak in surprise.

“Oh jeez, shit...um…” he glanced at Pepper, “I uh…”

“It’s alright, do what you need to,” she said and Clint squirmed then stood and started to move away and that confused Pepper, “Where are you going?”

“Um...the bedroom to you know...let him eat,” he gestured at the baby who was still doing embarrassing things to his shirt.

“You don’t have to on my account, it doesn’t bother me,” she said and Clint flushed.

“Um, that’s- yeah, but...uh-” he looked down, “It bothers me, I don’t want anyone to see…”

“Oh...well, of course it is up to you, but may I ask why?” she asked, looking curious.

“I...well...I don’t know, I just- it embarasses me…” he shrugged, “I’ll...be right back,” he said before she could ask more and he could run to hide away in the bedroom to feed Eddie.

He sighed once his shirt was off and the baby was attached to his nipple and sucking away happily, the tingly feeling would probably never stop, he figured, it was so weird, but this was a lot easier than the earlier days.

But he did wonder, why was he so embarrassed by this? It was natural, some mothers did it in public and it was no big deal, for them anyway, there were others who believed it should be kept behind closed doors, but whatever, most of them had no say in the matter as they were alphas.

Clint knew, somehow that if he’d been prepared for this, he would probably be like one of the omegas who did it in public in protest, because it was his body and his baby he could do what he liked. But now it just...he wasn’t sure, he couldn’t bring himself to do it in front of the others, or anyone, the only one who had come close to seeing was Natasha but she had never seen a baby feeding.

Maybe he’d get over it later...a year of breastfeeding seemed good for development, or at least until they had teeth. He wasn’t sure, he was still unsure about a lot of things, but he did want his kids to be okay. He would do his damndest to give them the best now that he was involved. He would try harder to get up to snuff about this parenting stuff.

Once Eddie was done he put his shirt back on and then headed back out, he looked at Pepper who was cooing at Maggie who was awake now, her little eyes taking in everything. Clint set Eddie down on his blanket and let him do his thing, like eat his toes.

“So….do you know how the others are doing?” he asked, “I don’t- oh yeah, JARVIS?”

“Yes, Agent Barton?”

“Um...how are the Avengers?” he asked and then jumped a bit when the TV turned on and showed the view from Tony’s suit.

“It would appear that all is well, Agent, Sir and the Captain have taken measures in these instances to make sure all in the pack are safe, Agent Romanoff is also doing well, as is the Hulk and Thor, they will be finishing the battle shortly, it seems the lizards are not fans of electricity,” the AI said promptly, Clint watched as Tony blasted a few of the things towards Thor who was able to take them out with a few zaps of lightning. Totally and utterly okay with everything.

“Oh...okay…” he frowned, it appeared they didn’t need a marksman, he sighed and looked down at Eddie who was happily munching on his toes. Maybe this was his life now, mother, no longer Avenger, or Agent, just...here. Not that there was anything wrong with mothers, Clint just didn’t think he was cut out to be one.

He still smiled at the little boy though because he found it impossible not to, even if he was a little depressed about his life right now.

So he was now the BabyMama of the Avengers, he’d be staying home, making the food, all of that jazz. There was nothing wrong with that, of course, he knew Bruce enjoyed it, he liked making the meals and caring for them when they were hurt, it was just who he was, but Clint? He couldn’t do that, that was just so not who he was, he liked flexibility and the ability to just get up and go whenever he wanted, he had no doubt it likely had to due with him never having a home in the past, no stability, no pack.

And now here he was with all of those things, and children, and he was terrified he was going to mess it all up and do it more than he ever had before. This was something that he knew would happen.

No matter how he felt about it, he just wasn’t cut out for this, he should just go, he wasn’t even needed as an Avenger anymore, what was the point of staying?

“Clint?” Pepper’s voice pulled him back to reality where he then heard the soft cries of Maggie.

“Shit,” he mutter and glanced at Eddie who was gazing up at him in wonder, probably wondering why his mother was such an idiot. He moved to look at Maggie who was warbling, he recognized it as the hungry cry.

“Are you okay?” Pepper asked and Clint gave her a nod and moved to pick up his daughter, he stood and moved to the bedroom.

“Be right back,” he muttered, and closed the door behind him, not really noticing Pepper’s eyes on him.

He was still out of it when the others came back shortly after, he wasn’t around when Pepper told Steve and Tony about his sudden shut down after they’d asked JARVIS for updates, and how he’d gone to feed Maggie like he was in a daze and still hadn’t come out yet. Steve and Tony gave each other looks, Tony took Eddie and then followed Steve to the bedroom, Steve knocked.

“Clint?” he called softly, but there was no reply, he knocked again then opened the door, Clint was sitting on the bed, Maggie asleep between his legs, he was looking down at her, his finger gripped in her hand, but it was clear he wasn’t all there.

“Clint?” Steve tried again and put his hand on the man’s shoulder, he broke out of his daze at the contact, he blinked and looked up at the alphas, who were still in battle gear, well, Tony was just in the suit he wore under the armor, but Steve was still in his spangled outfit.

“Oh,” he said, “Sorry...I didn’t mean to...you’re back,” he muttered and the alphas shared looks again.

“Clint what’s wrong? You zoned out hard, you’ve got us worried,” Tony said going to the other side of the bed while Steve picked up Maggie then sat down in front of Clint who moved his legs for him.

“I’m fine I was just...thinking,” Clint replied, seeming to come back to himself some more.

“About?” Steve asked, and Clint shrugged, “Clint...please, Pepper said you zoned out after you asked JARVIS about the battle, what’s wrong, what happened?”

“Nothing,” Clint said, but that was obviously not true.

“Katniss, you promised you were going to let us help, that includes everything you don’t like, what’s up?”

“It’s nothing it’s just...I get stuff now…”

“What do you get?” Steve asked gently.

“I know why I’m here, okay? To play house or whatever, I was just- it doesn’t matter.” The alphas shared one more look.

“Clint, you staying behind is only for now, okay? You’re still hurt, your physical therapist is impressed by your reckless motivation, but she agrees that you need to take it easy until your back is better, we’re not keeping you here to punish you, or because we don’t need you, we do, we could have used you out there today, but we’re more concerned with your health than...well than you are, so we’re only keeping you here because of that. Not even because of the babies, it’s because we want to keep you safe.”

“Fine,” Clint muttered.

“Clint,” Steve started raising a hand to Clint’s shoulder but Clint grabbed his hand before he reached, not roughly, and set it down.

“I’m fine, I’m just tired...I’m gonna go take a nap,” he muttered sliding off the bed.

“Hey, Clint, no, don’t run from this, come on,” Tony said, “Tell us what’s up.”

Clint stopped with his hand on the door for a second but still didn’t look like he was going to say anything.

“Pease, Clint, don’t shut us out again,” Steve begged softly.

Clint took a deep breath and pressed his forehead against the cool wood, “I don’t know,” he muttered, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Neither of the alphas said anything, they just let him talk, and they listened. A change from before.

“I know I should be happy with things now being...better, but...I feel like something’s still wrong and it’s my fault, I don’t know what it is,” he whispered, “I don’t know how to make it stop.”

Steve stood up and set Maggie down on the bed, then went over to Clint and pulled him away from the door and into his arms, “It’s not your fault Clint, it really isn’t, it never was,” Steve murmured.

“It sounds like Postpartum depression to me,” Tony said, and Clint peeked around Steve’s arm and frowned at him.

“What depression?” he asked, and came back to the bed with Steve’s gentle nudging.

“Postpartum,” Tony said smiling gently, “It happens to some mothers after they give birth, I’m not surprised you’ve got it, after all that shit that was pumped into you, it makes sense you’re a little off.”

Clint blinked at him owlishly, “How do you know that?”

Tony shrugged, “I looked stuff up, I know a lot about babies and childbirth and pregnancy I probably did not need to know, but some of it seems helpful.”

“So...it’s not...me?” Clint asked sounding hopeful.

“Not really, you were fucked with real bad, Legolas, it stands to reason that you would have some serious hormone imbalances and mental stuff going on,” he replied, “But that’s why we’re here and we’ll do whatever you need us to, to help.”

“Oh,” he said again and looked down, his hand reaching out to rub Maggie’s hand oh so gently, it was soft enough she didn’t even twitch in her sleep, she was comforted by having her mother and father so close, she wouldn’t wake up for anything but food at that point, and she’d just eaten.

“Don’t worry Clint, this is what we’re here for, just come to us whenever you have another feeling like that okay?” Steve asked and Clint nodded.

“I...can’t promise it, but I’ll try,” he said and Steve smiled, he raised his hand like he was going to cup Clint’s cheek, but settled for his shoulder instead.

“That’s all we need, we can take care of the rest,” Steve said and Clint scowled but only because it was expected.

“Don’t need to be taken care of,” he grumbled and squaked in surprise when Tony suddenly pulled him down on the bed next to Eddie, and then had Maggie on his other side, “Sure you don’t,” Tony drawled, “We will anyway, because that’s what we do.”

Clint blinked up at the two alphas who looked proud and smug, Steve and Tony respectively, and snorted, “Idiots,” he grumbled but sighed, “I still want a nap,” he said and the alphas chuckled and helped him move the pillows on to the end of the bed and moved the babies into the middle and then Clint laid himself on the other end and waved them away.

“Fuck off, we’re napping,” he said and Steve laughed softly, then bent down and pecked Maggie on the head softly, Tony did the same with Eddie, they both pat his leg and then left, Clint was a bit surprised they’d actually done what he asked, but he fell asleep anyway, he needed it.

He woke again to a little babbling voice, and then another tiny mewl in response, he cracked an eye open and saw the twins were both awake, Eddie was wiggling happily and Maggie was opening and closing her hands and flailing her tiny fists in the air as they talked to each other.

Clint laughed softly causing Eddie to look at him, and then babble at him too, “Hey, kiddo,” he said moving his hand to rub his head, “Are you and your sister talking?” he asked and Maggie gave a gurgle in response, Clint laughed and rubbed her head too, “You two are pretty great,” he said softly, “I’m sorry about everything, I’m sorry I didn’t get to carry you like a loving mother like you deserved, I’m sorry it’s going to take me awhile to get used to this, but I’m gonna be the best Ada I can be for you two,” he lifted each tiny hand to his lips and kissed them softly. Just watching them babble and gurgle for a bit, it was nice. But he was hungry now.

He sighed then and stood up, looking down at them, “Okay...how’re we gonna do this?” He shrugged and then scooped a baby up in each arm, it was good he was ambidextrous or this would be hard. But he got each one cradled in his arms comfortably and then turned to the door and sighed because now he had no way to open the door.

Luckily the door opened a second later and Bruce popped his head in, “Oh, you’re awake, good, dinner is almost ready.”

“You didn’t come get me to help?” Clint asked and Bruce smiled in reassurance.

“You needed the rest,” he said, “You can help with dessert,” he said and Clint sighed, it felt like everyone was babying him.

“Right,” he sighed again and headed out of the room, he went over to the living room area and the couch, Steve was on the couch, he looked up at them and his face lit up at the sight of them.

“Hey! Have a good nap?” he asked, smiling and holding his arms out for Maggie, Clint handed her over and readjusted his grip on Eddie.

“Yeah, it was good,” he replied, “They were talking to each other when I woke up,” he said and Steve laughed.

“Were you talking?” he cooed at the little girl, giving her a too big finger to grip, “Were you telling your brother what’s what?”

The baby girl babbled again up at her daddy, Clint chuckled and sat down on the floor with Eddie, helping him to sit up and playing with him until Tony came up a little later.

“Dinner!” he said cheerfully as he scooped up Eddie, “Did you have a good nap with your- with Clint?” he said quickly and Clint snorted even as the baby giggled happily at the attention from his father.

“Having an identity crisis for me, Stark?” he asked and Tony shrugged.

“I don’t know what you want to call yourself,” he said and Clint nodded.

“I...don’t think ‘Mom’ really fits me...so...I’ll just stick with Ada,” he said, shrugging, and not looking at the alphas.

“If that’s what you want,” Steve said, but he sounded pleased, he was used to that name, considering when he was born.

Ada was usually something used back in the day for male omegas, it wasn’t until recently that they decided to just make mom all encompassing, the same was for Ama, for female alphas, now it was just dad, or personal preference for either.

Clint followed them to the table and sat down only for Steve and Tony to sit on either side of him, he blinked and saw Natasha smirking at him from the other side. He aimed a kick her way under the table but she moved and he missed, he huffed softly, but otherwise said nothing even if she did look smug.

Dinner was easy and filling and Clint was surprised by how hungry he was, he was in desperate need of some good food, he should have been eating like this for months, but was a stubborn idiot and avoided the common room kitchen like the plague. He was an idiot for not eating.

After dessert everyone stuck around instead of splitting like they had in the past, Clint just sat back and waited knowing it had to do with him, somehow.

“Alright so...we thought we should come up with a plan for who stays behind every time we get called out, Clint you won’t have to stay forever, just until you stop breastfeeding, while your hormones are still going crazy you’re at risk,” Steve said, and put a hand on Clint’s shoulder again to keep him from bursting in protest.

“It would make us less likely to be stupid and try to protect you during battle too,” Tony added and Clint frowned, his face scrunching up because that was definitely going to be true.

Alphas had a bad habit of letting their protective instincts take control in stressful situations, even if omegas tended to be more able to do the serious fighting they were fierce and sometimes ruthless, they had family ties usually which made them ultra ready to keep their families safe, alphas were great leaders but could sometimes let their protective instincts and need to prove themselves go to their heads and do a lot of sacrificing that was unnecessary. That was why it was usually Alpha Neutrals that took leads of Omega and Omega Neutral groups in the military. They had slightly better control of those instincts.

Having two alphas concerned over the same omega in the same battle was likely to end badly because they would try to out do each other, so it was a good idea for Clint to not participate while he was an omega, he would probably be fine once he was a Beta again.

He let out a huff, “Fine,” he grumbled, “But I’m not gonna be happy about it,” he said slouching in his seat.

Steve pat his shoulder, “That’s all we ask, and...I feel more comfortable leaving the babies with you,” he smiled, “Not that Pepper isn’t wonderful, but…” Tony flapped his hand at him.

“It’s okay, she’s still just my pack, not yours, she understands,” he said, “But she should join the pack, she gives damn good cuddles.”

Clint snorted in amusement at that, “That is an important thing to look for in a Beta you know,” he grinned.

“Guess we’ll need to make sure it holds true with you, huh?” Tony replied, smirking.

“Are you-” Clint started, but was interrupted by Bruce.

“Anyway,” he cleared his throat, “You were saying about a plan?” he gestured at Steve.

“Yes, we need to have two people here at all times, I’m not convinced we took out Hydra Rebirth entirely, they may try to come back so…” he shrugged.

“Paranoia can only get you so far,” Tony said but he shrugged too, “That’s why I have JAVIS.”

“Thank you, Sir,” the AI said as close to bland as his programming permitted.

“Sure thing, Jay,’ Tony grinned and Clint rolled his eyes.

“Well I hope they get here, I’d like to shoot a few of them in the eye,” Clint said mildly, poking at his empty plate.

“We were going to let you help out with the raids you know, but you were…”

“A dick?”

“Unstable.”

“I don’t think that’s much better,” he said making a face, looking petulant and put upon, he didn’t recognize the matching looks of fondness on the two alpha’s faces, which was probably good, he would have punched them if he noticed.

“Either way, you were better left to recover, but, we can try to save a few for you,” Tony said, “Think you deserve it after all the shit you’ve gone through.”

“I think that’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me, Stark,” Clint said mildly amused.

“I can be sweeter,” Tony replied with a smirk that actually seemed to throw Clint off a bit, he hadn’t expected the smirk to be laced with sexual undertones. Why the hell was Tony-?

Steve cleared his throat, “Anyway, we’ll be sure to bring you along for those missions, but until then, one of us is going to stay with you when we’re called out, we have a roster of who stays behind, and of course backups in case we need certain people for certain scenarios,” he said and Clint looked over at him, instead of staring at Tony who had grown just a bit uncomfortable and embarrassed by it.

“...okay,” he said, “I guess...that’s better...but you know I’m going to feel guilty the first time that happens,” he grumbled and then felt Natasha’s foot rub against his leg.

“That’s why I’m the first one on the roster,” she said in almost a purr, her eyes shone with mischief.

“You guys suck,” Clint said flatly, because there was no way she was going to let him feel guilty.

The whole table cracked up, and Clint felt like they were finally a pack again, and it had been far too long since the first time.

~

“I’m an idiot,” Tony sighed, slumping into the rocking chair in the corner of the nursery.

Steve glanced up at him from where he was changing Maggie’s diaper, “Uh-huh, What else is new?”

Tony puffed his cheeks out at him which made Maggie giggle when Steve sat her up on the changing table, Eddie was down with Clint and Natasha.

“You’re not supposed to agree, honestly Rogers,” Tony huffed and Steve hummed then handed Maggie to him so he could throw the diaper away and wipe his hands off.

“Mmm, well I don’t know what you’re being an idiot about,” Steve said, “It could be any number of things.”

“You think you’re sooo clever,” Tony huffed making more faces that elicited more giggles from the baby girl in his lap, “Your daddy thinks he’s so funny.”

“She knows her daddy is so funny,” Steve smirked picking her up and kissing her head, “What did you need Tony?”

“It’s Clint, how is one of the sharpest men I know being so thick?”

“Ah,” Steve smiled, “I think that’s his self esteem coming into play, he can’t understand why you’d be flirting with him, it’s also a bit...early for it, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, yeah it is...but...I just want him to be where I can see him at night, I’d rest better knowing he was safe,” he shrugged and Steve smiled at him, he felt the same way, but he still knew it was best not to push, Clint needed to realize it on his own.

“I know, but...Clint has been seeing things a lot slower than we’re used to, we just have to give him more time, he has a lot to work out, he’s already beyond what I would expect of him to be honest, after all of the shit we put him through,” Steve said.

“I know...but I’m impatient, I hate waiting!” Tony grumbled standing up to follow Steve out the door.

“Waiting usually reaps the best rewards,” Steve said and Tony eyed him as they walked to the elevator.

“You’re really happy now? ‘Waiting’?” he asked and Steve smiled kissing little fingers grabbing his face.

“I am, I know it’s not my first choice of a pack, but...having one at all is better than not, and...having one like this one is really more than I could ask for,” he said simply, it was true and he was just grateful for what he had.

“You are too damn perfect, Rogers, it’s not fair,” Tony grumbled as they entered the elevator.

Steve smiled,   
“What can I say? I was born this way.”

“You are not allowed to be immersed in pop culture anymore, Lady Gaga!” Tony declared and Steve burst into laughter, making the baby squeal in delight.

“I’d like to see you try and stop me,” Steve grinned, “But seriously Tony, just give Clint time, who knows what will happen, one step at a time.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know...I don’t like it, but I know.”

Steve smiled as they stepped out of the elevator and back onto the main floor where Clint and Natasha were entertaining Eddie with funny faces.

Yeah, it was a good pack.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Names and such things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooh my gosh you guys! I am a day late, I'm sorry! I had the longest week of my life and was so exhausted last night I totally forgot to update! D: But here it is now, I'm awake early and doing it now! So yeah!

Clint found that he was happier now, with the babies and with his pack, surrounded by them every chance they got, he got better and better, he still had his moments, as was to be expected, but he got some help, medically speaking, another therapist after much whining in protest, because he already had one but this one was was specifically for those who had experienced sexual trauma, he understood why but he still barely remembered anything from his time in the hands of his captors, he’d been so drugged it was a blessing of sorts at this point. But he was allowed to talk about the feelings of that time and really understand that he didn’t blame Steve or Tony for not being able to fight off the drugs that had made them mate with him. Because they’d been drugged and kidnapped just like him, they were all in the same boat there. He was able to feel better about that, and it really did help, it also made him understand some other things...that he still wasn’t sure he was ready for. Not yet.

 

Clint was totally absorbed by the babies now too, he was involved in everything from playing to bathing to nap times on top of feeding, and he couldn’t find enough time in the day to spend with both of them and their dads, usually they were together, but Steve had other things to take care of, he still worked for SHIELD on a contract basis, they’d talked him and Natasha into it, Clint sort of hated that, but it was what it was. And Tony had Stark Industries things to do, so Clint got the babies a lot of the time, and now he found he really didn’t mind. They were more than reminders of his pain these days, they were their own people and he loved getting to know them.

 

He’d also finally decided what to name them, or half name them as the case was.

  
“Okay...so...um…” He rubbed the back of his head, looking nervously at the two alphas on the couch looking at him expectantly a baby in each lap, he’d asked them up here so he could tell them, and now he was nervous, what if they didn’t like the names?

“Out with it Barton, we don’t have all day,” Tony drawled, though he looked perfectly content to just sit there all day with his spawn sucking on his finger. Steve looked much the same, Maggie also holding onto a finger while she slept.

“Shut up, Stark,” Clint sighed, rubbing his face, “You know this is not easy, so don’t be a douche.”

“Right right, we’re taking it very seriously,” Tony sighed dramatically.

“Tony,” Steve said, edging on his ‘Captain’ voice, “Go on Clint, ignore him.”

“Yeah,” Clint muttered, “So...um...well, I sorta went with what I know and I figured out you named Eddie after JARVIS, or...Edwin Jarvis...the guy who pretty much raised you, right?” he asked and that seemed to catch Tony off guard, but he nodded.

“An AI and your son after one guy...that’s pretty touching you know,” Clint said grinning, Tony flipped him off.

“And Margaret is...for Peggy Carter, yeah?” he asked and Steve nodded, not embarrassed, but was a bit proud about it, and slightly flushed for it.

“Right...well...aside from that being incredibly ironic, um...I figured I should do something meaningful too...so...um...I got Charles Edwin Barton-Stark and Margaret Aliana Barton-Rogers...and um my brother’s name was Charles, and Natasha is Natalia Alianovna...so...yeah… I...does that sound okay?”

“Oh, Clint I think they’re wonderful,” Steve said smiling with even more pride and looking incredibly touched, he looked down at his baby girl and officially branded her Margaret Aliana, he thought it was beautiful.

“Wait wait wait, Barton-Stark, why is your name first?” Tony asked indignantly, and Clint and Steve both gave him a look.

“Because B comes before S, genius,” Clint said and sounded completely done, if his face was anything to go by, Tony was up and grabbing his arm before he had the chance to run away and fret, then he yanked him down on the couch.

“I’m kidding, god you’re so sensitive,” he snorted and Clint opened his mouth to call him a few choice words when there was a baby trying to crawl on his lap, he glared at Tony but pulled Eddie over into his lap, putting a smile on his face before looking down at the tot, “Hey, baby boy,” he cooed.

“I’m serious, it was a joke,” Tony frowned.

“Probably not the best time for it,” Steve said with a sigh, “Especially when he was nervous and you said nothing about what you thought of the name he decided to call your son.”

“I was getting there, I was just getting to the imp-” Steve gave him another look and glanced at Clint who was clearly hunched in on himself and definitely not looking at Tony.

“Aaah...shit. Shit, Clint I didn’t- I don’t- the name is great, I love it, it sounds perfect, I...didn’t know you had a brother,” he said, because he was just being a dick, he could do that sometimes now and again, he hoped Clint would take it like he used to, before the whole kidnapped and impregnated thing, he wasn’t very good at being sensitive himself. He knew Clint was closer to how he had been, but he wasn’t completely there, he may never get there. And Tony maybe was a bit...scared. Clint was getting better, more himself, and loving on his kids and being a damn good mother, but the connection Tony had made with him during his heat was not going away and that scared him.

Sometimes it happened that you grew attached to the omega you helped through a heat, it was natural, it was meant to help, but a lot of the time if no more actions were taken even after a child was born, no steps toward a bond, the attachment would fade. But Tony’s hadn’t and it bothered him. Not that he didn’t like Clint, he just figured Clint wasn’t interested, the few times Tony had bothered to flirt Clint had come across as shocked and unresponsive. He knew Steve had told him to just give him time, but it just seemed hopeless at this point. So...why bother?

But why was it bothering him? Scared definitely.

But that didn’t give him an excuse to be a dick.

Clint glanced at him and shrugged, “He’s dead,” he said blunt as could be, “I’m the one who killed him.”

“...oh,” Tony said, because he certainly hadn’t expected that.

Clint snorted, he’d obviously gotten the reaction he’d intended, “Yep, it was an accident, but...he’s still dead. And he’s the only person I’d really want to name a kid after...maybe Nick…” he added, “But...You guys probably wouldn’t go for that.”

“You were close with Fury?” Steve asked and Clint shrugged.

“About as close as you can be to the man, he’s the one who recruited me to SHIELD, and then put me on the team with Coulson who got me better than any other handler. He looked out for me, even as director...it’s thanks to him that I wasn’t thrown in the Fridge- a SHIELD prison- by the WSC after New York,” he said, “So...yeah.”

“Well...okay...so he’s not a total dick,” Tony said Clint snorted at that.

“Sometimes, but yeah...so...um now you know if you like ‘em I guess you can put them on the birth certificate or...whatever,” he muttered standing up and putting Eddie on his hip, he still wasn’t really looking at either of them.

“Clint,” Tony said, “It’s a great name, really, it sounds like he belongs in high society and everything...thanks for you know...sharing it.”

Clint looked up and did seem to relax finally, he nodded slowly, “Sure,” he said but that seemed to be all he could do for the day as he walked off probably to play with Eddie on his own.

Tony sighed and slumped against the couch.

“Uhg,”  Tony groaned.

“You have got it bad,” Steve said, looking down at Maggie who had woken by then, he let her play with his fingers idly, wiggling them for her benefit.

“What are you talking about, Rogers?” Tony asked, crossing his arms.

Steve looked over at him then, eyebrow raised and a small smile teasing his lips, “You are gone for Clint,” he said and Tony scowled, he’d been hoping no one would notice. Dammit.

“Yeah...well it’ll go away, the heat attachment is just lasting longer than usual because of all the shit that’s happened after it,” he said, as if it explained everything, but Steve was an alpha too, he knew that was a load of bullshit.

“It’s been over a year since his heat, Tony,” he said and that was true, Eddie was almost six months, Maggie was going to be four months, making it a year and a month since they had been shoved into a room with a heat stricken Clint and forced to mate.

“Well, we were drug induced,” he said trying to see if that explained it instead, Steve shook his head and stood up.

“If you want to be a good alpha to him and try and bond, I suggest not acting like you’d rather he not be around, especially considering how long it took us to get him to be around,” he said putting Maggie on his chest at his shoulder.

Tony spluttered, “That’s not- I am not- we are not going to bond!”

“Not at this rate you aren’t,” Steve agreed and Tony glared at him then crossed his arms.

“Whatever, it doesn’t matter, he’s not interested anyway, after everything he’s been through, he wouldn’t want me as an alpha,” he said.

Steve shrugged, “You wouldn’t be bad to him, you’re pretty close in personality, there’d probably be a lot of shit talking, and some fights, but you’d be good together...if it were to happen.”

Tony blinked at him, was Steve trying to set him up with Clint?

“Well...what about you? You’re the alpha specimen of the century, literally, why not you? You’d be good with him, probably better than me, but you’re not doing anything about it even if you get along really well. How did you get over your attachment?” he asked, because maybe it would help him.

Steve smiled at him before turning around, Maggie’s little face peeking over his massive shoulder as he headed out, “I didn’t.” Steve admitted, just as he walked out the door.

Tony stared after him in shock. Because what the fuck.

 

~

 

Unfortunately the time for romance was well passed as things started picking up more, the roster for those staying with Clint and the babies was put into use shortly after the babies’ names were made official.

It was like the villains of the world ad just been goofing around until then and now were coming at them full force.

Now they were getting a call every few weeks, it was making Clint batty, he did not want to be left behind and having to stay twice in one week was probably the worst thing possible to happen.

He ended up staying on the range for three hours longer than he was supposed to, so he’d been there for a grand total of five hours and no one could talk him out of the room. Mostly because he ignored them at first and then got to the point where he just didn’t hear them anymore.

They hadn’t tried their dirtiest tactic yet.

Neither baby was really big enough to crawl yet, Eddie had managed to get on his hands and feet once, but that was about it, Maggie was still getting used to rolling over. But they could put Eddie in his bouncer and roll that over to Clint. Which was exactly what they did aiming it just right so he bounced along and then bumped right into the back of his mother’s legs.

Clint had been so caught up in his own head he jumped a foot in the air, he nearly dropped his bow too.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” he cried, then looked down at the baby gazing up at him looking so serious, “Oh...shit baby boy you gave me a heart attack,” he muttered then set his bow down and picked him up, “And I will be getting your daddy back for this,” he said just loud enough for JARVIS to pick up and carry the message to Tony, but it wasn’t really needed as Tony entered the room a second later.

“Oh please, he was fine,” he said, Clint glared at him.

“I could have hurt him, or have you forgotten that I’m an assassin and have an assassin’s reflexes?” he snapped and Tony flapped his hands.

“You also have a mother’s instincts, you knew it was him the moment he was in the room with you,” he said, “Come on Clint, I wouldn’t put my kid in danger like that.”

“You just did.”

“I did not, the second Eddie was in the room your shoulders relaxed from where they were around your ears,” he said with a huff, “Seriously Clint, you’ve been in here for five hours, your kids are starving.”

“What?” Clint looked wide eyed, “I have not,” he protested, Tony pointed at the clock behind Clint’s head, and it had in fact been five hours since he came in, “Shit.”

“Yeah, you probably strained yourself too,” Tony added, and Clint realized that he did have a burning ache in his chest.

“Why didn’t you guys come get me earlier?” he asked and Tony gave him a look.

“We tried, you ignored us,” he said blandly.

“Oh…” Clint muttered and sighed shifting Eddie because he was hungry he was trying to mouth at Clint’s nipple through his shirt, “Shit...I guess I was just...lost in thought…”

“Yeah, we figured you were angsting about not being out with us for the shit show that was the battle on Tuesday, and then the whatever the heck that was on Thursday,” Tony shrugged, “Two times in one week was a pain and we really weren’t needed on Thursday, I would have prefered to stay, you said Eddie even held his sister too.”

Clint shrugged, “She rolled over to him and he just pat at her, it was pretty cute…” he muttered, “But still.”

“But still, being an Avenger is a pain in the ass. Before I had him, I didn’t even really consider kids, it just didn’t seem like something I would do, but now that I have him, I can’t think of life without him, and sometimes I even consider quitting the Avengers altogether.”

“What?” Clint asked, shocked, because that was a surprise, Tony loved being an Avenger.

“Protecting the world is important, which is why it’s still something I’m doing, but I do want to just be with my kid and my pack too,” he said, “It sort of makes me realize how important it is for the Avengers to be here and help people. To protect that possibility.”

Clint blinked, because he’d never really thought of it that way, he looked down at Eddie again who was now sucking on Clint’s shirt, yeah he needed to feed him, now that he noticed his chest was aching from milk too, yikes he’d been too caught up in himself, and not in a good way.

But protecting everyone was also protecting family, and Clint was protecting the littlest members of the pack while the big ones were away, that was important too, it was really important. Considering everyone was depending on him.

Clint sighed, “Yeah...yeah...it still is hard you know, I was never meant to be a mother,” he grumbled.

“Whether you were meant to be or not is sort of moot at this point, just as long as you’re trying your best, I don’t think it matters, and besides you do alright...at least I think so,” Tony shrugged, “You make a pretty good Ada.”

Clint looked up at him, a bit conscientious, “...you think so?”

“Yeah, I do...now feed my son before he eats your shirt,” Tony said pointing at the giant wet spot of drool and lactation on Clint’s shirt.

Clint flushed, “Uh...right,” he muttered, he bent down awkwardly to grab his bow so he could hang it up, but Tony beat him to it, placing it on the rack with the others then grabbed Eddie’s bouncer and followed Clint out of the range.

Clint was utterly embarrassed by the wet spot on his shirt and rushed to the bedroom before anyone could say anything when he got up to the common floor.

He let Eddie feed, like normal, poor kid was starving, and just tried not to focus on how his body ached from overdoing it.

He thought about what Tony said and wondered if maybe he wasn’t completely awful at this mother business, did other mothers forget to feed their kids? Or have the gut reactions of violence first and questions second? He doubted it. But still…

He looked down at Eddie, growing so much in such a short time, and just so wonderful, and Clint was the one who got him like this, in an intimate close bonding no one else could experience but a mother.

He realised he was lucky, of the twelve possible genders and dynamics, 6 had the possibility of being mothers, but Omega Neutrals rarely were, and Beta Switches were really unlikely to choose to begin with, it was mostly just the Omegas that were mothers. So he was lucky.

He did feel something, pride and joy and a connection, that was important he was sure. He lifted Eddie up once he was done.

“Do you think I’m a good Ada?” he asked and Eddie gurgled, his little hands patting at Clint’s face happily, Clint chuckled and kissed his fingers, “You’re bias,” he told him getting a happy blurble in response, “But you’re forgiven.”

He sighed, but smiled, he was glad, his babies were happy and loved, that had to count for something right?

He got up and headed to the door, peeking out he saw Tony on the couch talking with Steve about something, Maggie was probably starving too. He snuck out, as well as he could and plopped Eddie down in his bouncer again then snagged up Maggie from the blanket on the floor, Steve was watching him, looking a bit amused. Clint hurried back into the bedroom so he could feed Maggie.

He decided that he maybe wasn’t as horrible as he felt he was when Maggie didn’t want to leave his arms after she fed, that also had to count for something, he was pretty sure there was a rule about that somewhere.

He ended up napping with her in his arms, he didn’t think he’d been that tired but he didn’t wake up until he felt someone brush fingers through his hair, he jerked awake because no one ever got that close to him while he was sleeping.

His eyes snapped open to Steve smiling down at him fondly, he blinked up at him in surprise, then felt Maggie wiggle in his arms.

“Hey?” he said and Steve chuckled taking the baby from him.

“Hey,” he replied, “We were wondering what happened to you, we let you sleep for a bit anyway, but Bruce wanted to start dinner soon and you said you wanted to help.”

“Oh, yeah, I guess I’ll go do that,” he muttered groping around for his shirt, but Steve sat down and then Tony and Eddie were there a second later and Clint hadn’t even known they were in the room, jesus he was losing his touch.

“Actually before you do, we had something to ask you about,” Tony said letting Eddie loose on the bed so he could wiggle and roll to his little heart’s content.

“What’s that?” Clint asked looking between the alphas.

“Well...feeding the babies at night has become a bit of a process, we have to go get you once they wake up, then you feed them then we put them back down. We were thinking it might be easier if you just...stayed in the room with them,” Tony suggested.

“But...don’t they have separate nurseries?” Clint asked and the other two looked a bit surprised at the question.

“Oh...well they do...but we haven’t really been able to use them,” Steve said, “They refuse to sleep in a crib without the other close these days, so we made another nursery up in the penthouse between the master bedroom and a guest bedroom for me, a door on each side just in case...and well there is a bed in there….if you wanted to just sleep with them…we usually just switch off, because of SIDs and all that you’re not supposed to let them sleep alone for the first year at least.”

“SIDs?” Clint asked.

“Um...Sudden Infant Death…” Tony said and Clint went pale, “It’s not that common! Don’t freak out, it’s just something that has happened enough to have a name, people are paranoid about everything when it comes to their kids, you know…”

“...okay…” he muttered, then frowned, “Wait...so you want me to...permanently sleep with the babies?” he asked, and Steve shrugged.

“If you want to, or you could just sleep in another guest room closer so we don’t have to go get you in the middle of the night,” he said, and Clint would admit that sounded a lot better than having a baby shoved at him every few hours at his door each night to feed.

He thought for a minute, “Sure...sounds better to me,” he said, “I’d rather have that than you guys being all sleep rumpled and grumpy banging on my door ten times each night.”

“Oh shut it, Barton, we make a very attractive appearance at three AM, don’t we?” Tony cooed at Eddie who giggled in agreement, “Exactly.”

Clint laughed, “Wow, I stand corrected,” he said laughing some more and didn’t really notice the stare he got in response for his laugh, because sure he was laughing more, but it still wasn’t as much as everyone was used to. Clint used to laugh a lot and now it was a surprise and a treat to get a little chuckle out of him.

Let alone a full blown laugh.

But there he was laughing and even at something Tony had said. It was a pretty good occasion.

“I missed that,” Tony muttered, and Clint glanced at him.

“Missed what?”

“You. Laughing.”

Clint looked at him surprised, “Um...okay.”

“Yeeep, I’m gonna go down to the workshop now,” Tony said standing up abruptly to head off, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head.

Clint looked after him and then at Steve, “Did I miss something?”

Steve looked immensely amused, “Yeah, but that’s okay, you’ll hit it eventually, you never miss.”

“Ahaha, you’re so funny, Rogers,” Clint rolled his eyes and shook his head, Steve only grinned and watched as Clint went to playing with Eddie since Tony swanned off. He still had no idea what was going on, or what to think. But that wasn’t new, Steve was right, he’d figure it out eventually.

 

~

 

Things were good. They were going well, better than they had been for a long time, so naturally that meant something had to happen to test their resilience.

It started pretty standard, a call for help for something rampaging through some city or some such, Clint waving the others off, saying he could manage the babies alone this time, mostly because they were all needed for this one, and mostly because he didn’t need the reminder he wasn’t out with them.

The babies made him feel better about it at the very least.

Maggie was getting the hang of rolling over and sitting with help at five months, and Eddie was able to rock on his hands and knees and bounce like a spring quite happily at seven months, they were both pretty wonderful. He was glad he was able to accept things now, his therapists were pleased with his progress.

Right then he was making himself some food, he had the twins in highchairs, Eddie was banging on his tray table babbling away quite happily while Maggie was more subdued and sucking on a pacifier while watching her mother move about the kitchen. It was rather nice, he’d turn and babble back at Eddie and make faces at Maggie and get giggles in return.

It was actually pretty great, JARVIS was keeping him updated, the feed from the Hud of Iron Man still on the TV, but it wasn’t a big deal, he only glanced at it occasionally. Still worried for his teammates, his pack. He could hear them all talking, things seemed to be going just fine, it was just a lot of busy work, it would take hours.

That sucked, but it was what it was.

Clint had never really been able to spend time like this with the babies before, it was kind of scary, but also really nice, it was utterly domestic, but Clint found he didn’t really mind.

He finished up his food and ate quickly, Eddie was getting restless and Maggie shouldn’t be up in the high chair for too long anyway, so he finished his sandwich then took Eddie down and let him wiggle on his blanket for a second while he grabbed Maggie. She was an affectionate little thing, always laying her head on his chest, he would be lying if he didn’t admit that was one of his favorite things for either of them to do.

He held her for a bit before setting her down next to her brother so they could play a little, he glanced up at the screen again, still doing what they’d been doing for the last three hours, uhg.

He smiled at the twins again, it was hard not to smile at them, they were just too precious and brought out the best in everyone. Including him.

He was in the middle of getting tired giggles out of them when he noticed that things were just a little...off.

Both of his children were acting a bit more lethargic than they should and he was feeling a bit hazy himself. He looked up at the screen again, staring for a long moment, he realized the footage was looping. Oh god.

“JARVIS?” he called and already he sounded weak, he grew beyond worried when the AI didn’t respond. He exhaled quickly then lifted his shirt and then put it over his nose and mouth, taking deep breaths and thank god he could feel himself thinking a tad more clearly. He tried to make it secure then he scooped up his very worryingly limp babies. He rushed to the elevator, but no, of course it wasn’t working. He swore softly then turned to the bedroom, closing the door and setting his children on the bed, he carefully removed the covers then shoved the comforter at the bottom of the door, then he hung the sheets over the vents, he knew where all of them were. It took awhile, but slowly, the hazy feeling faded and he was able to look at his babies.

They were both far too still.

“No...no no no no no,” he whispered rushing over to them and checking their pulses, he could almost cry knowing they were still alive feeling the small blips of their heart beats, but Eddie’s was still too fast, his asthma.

“Come on, baby,” Clint begged, picking him up and placing him against his chest, rubbing his back and trying to get his lungs to calm down, he knew he succeeded when Eddie burst into wails, “Oh thank god,” Clint said on a sob, “Hush baby boy, you’re okay,” he soothed, setting him down next to his sister who was looking a bit pasty, good god if she was allergic to this shit…

Heads were going to roll.

He was able to finally breath easy, but his head was by no means clear, he was down right pissed, completely enraged, someone had tried to hurt his children, they were going to pay.

But he couldn’t very well do anything while locked in a room trying to keep his babies safe, and without his bow, all he had was a knife, a simple one he carried on him at all times to make him feel secure.

In the grand scheme of things, that would be enough.

It had to be a half an hour before he heard movement outside of the room, he slipped his knife into his hand and took a protective stance in front of his children, hoping the pillows he’d piled around them would prevent them from rolling off of the bed if he had to leave them.

He heard movement towards the door and prayed to any god that would listen that it was Tony and Steve and the rest of the pack, oh did he hope.

No such luck.

The door was torn off it’s hinges and there were people in tactical uniforms with modified Hydra insignias on the other side, Hydra Rebirth.

He didn’t think, he moved, the knife hit the first attacker in the throat then he was rushing forward to yank it out before the body hit the floor, he took out the second and third just as quickly but he was ridiculously outnumbered, he did not stop fighting, he took out one after the other, utterly relieved they weren’t shooting, because the babies were just in the other room and- no! One of the fuckers had gotten around him and was going for his children.

He swung around and threw the knife at the back of the man’s skull, he dropped a mere foot from the bed.

Of course that was just enough of a distraction for someone to get him, a bullet ripped through his shoulder and then he was taken down to the floor, his face slamming against the ground all before he could even cry out in pain.

He struggled, snarling and swearing, breaking everything he came in contact with until he couldn’t move at all.

“Enough,” a voice said sharply, and Clint only snarled, and put up even more of a fight when he saw one of them holding Maggie, she was wailing and totally not cooperating, that was his girl, but who the fuck did he think he was, touching his baby?

“It’s really a shame this couldn’t be carried out with us, you know, it would have been much easier,” the man was saying, “It was so much trouble, finding out the truth about all of this, we didn’t know you’d had twins, not until recently, and to discover one of them was Captain Rogers’, well that was just a stroke of luck wasn’t it?”

“Fuck you!” Clint snarled, “Put my daughter down or I will rip your throat out and crush your skull with my bare hands!”

“Such a change of heart, Agent Barton, I thought you didn’t want them?” he asked, as if he cared.

“When I get my hands on you, you will wish you were never born,” Clint promised with a raging hiss, the man only smirked.

“Move out, we have much to do to, we have months to make up for,” the man said already turning away.

“She doesn’t have his serum you fuckwad!” Clint yelled, “She’s sickly and too small! She’s like Steve before he got it! You have nothing!”

“Oh, that’s only because the serum has yet to be activated, Agent Barton, it took ‘Vita Rays’ controlled by Howard Stark to spark the reaction in Steve Rogers that it did,” the man replied glancing at him over his shoulder, and Clint noticed in the back of his mind that he was only being held by two people now. The others’ moving around to their dead and wounded comrades, leaving Clint less guarded. He just needed an opportunity.

“Doctor Banner of course believed it was Gamma radiation that sparked it, it will only take a moment of pain and she will be perfect,” the man said and Clint felt a stab of pure terror in his heart.

“You’ll kill her!”

“Possibly, but you can always give us more test subjects.”

Clint didn’t think after that, the rage that overtook him only let him see red, he was free one second, had a gun the next and the Hydra agents dropped like flies.

He was too fast to shoot, adrenaline and instinct taking over, soon enough he had the gun pressed to the man holding his daughter, right against his forehead.

He had no witty words, he only pulled the trigger, catching his daughter before she fell with the body.

She was still wailing her head off, Clint dropped the gun and hushed her gently, completely oblivious to the blood splatter that was dotting his whole body.

She calmed almost immediately, with a little hiccup and then she was blinking up at him calm and trusting. Clint let out a breath, she was okay. Thank all the gods ever. She was okay...but...

“Eddie,” he breathed, then rushed back into the bedroom, Eddie was there, crying just a bit, but Clint laughed in relief when he saw he was only crying because he couldn’t reach the zipper on one of the pillow cases.

He was so relieved that they were both okay he collapsed, sliding Maggie on the bed and then letting out a few watery sobs. They were okay. His babies were okay, for once he hadn’t failed. He was actually doing right for once in his life.

He pressed his head to the bed and took several deep breaths, he had things to do still, but he was suddenly very dizzy, why was he so..?

He suddenly noticed the slow drip of blood onto the carpet, his shoulder throbbed in time with his heartbeat. Oh yeah, he’d been shot and since he didn’t feel a bullet, it must have been a through shot.

Shit, he needed to get patched up or he was going to pass out and then bleed out on the floor next to his children. He would rest for just a moment, and then he’d get up and call the others. Unless they got here first...yeah...He was seeing black, but then he could see the floor blurring, and then black again. He was going to get up, once he could feel his fingers again.

“Clint!”

Oh thank fuck.

He heard familiar voices and footsteps nearing, the pack was back, it was going to be okay, it was all okay.

And then his vision blacked out entirely and he thumped against the floor, knowing no more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -happy little smile- Have a good week!
> 
> P.S.: Yes, Clint is aware that Edwin Jarvis and Peggy Carter teamed up way back in the day.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The epic conclusion! Please enjoy~

Clint woke up warm and in a bed, and slowly he realized his shoulder had been tapped up, the pain was faint, but there. He’d been given mild painkillers then, made sense. So he was alive, that was good.

He also noticed he was not alone.

He opened his eyes and then looked on either side of him, Tony was on his left, and Steve was on his right, and a baby sleeping on either side of them. The bed was pretty fucking big.

He moved to sit up, hissing as that sent a jolt of pain through his shoulder, it also woke up Steve.

“Clint,” he said and Clint twitched in slight surprise, he glanced over at him.

“Cap?”

Steve let out a breath, a relieved one, “You had us worried you know…”

“Sorry,” he replied rubbing his head, noting that his muscles were really sore, yikes, he’d really overworked himself, “How long’ve I been out? What happened?”

“About ten hours...not long enough. But it’s been a bit hectic...we found out that some of the Hydra Rebirth medics had infiltrated SHIELD Medical to watch over you, they were planning to just leave it be when they found out it was Tony’s baby, it turned out Maggie was a surprise for them too so they came to get you and failed,” Clint sighed softly, fucking assholes, well they were dead now, whatever. “So...it’s fine, but...um…” he gestured at Clint’s chest awkwardly and then Clint realized half of that pain was coming from his chest and he was also lactating, shit...he needed to feed the babies. God, the babies.

“Are they okay?” he asked and Steve didn’t even take a moment to hand over Maggie, she was sleeping, but clearly not very well. She woke when she smelt her mother around her though, she babbled softly.

Clint let out a small breath and closed his eyes, she was okay, she was just hungry, if her little mewls were anything to go by.

“We tried feeding them formula, it didn’t really work,” Steve said, letting out a breath. Clint looked over at him and noticed that he looked pretty awful, worn and tired, which took some serious skill, considering he was a super soldier.

“I’m sorry,” he said quickly and Steve looked at him, surprised, and confused.

“What? What for?”

“Um for...getting hurt?” Clint replied, now confused himself.

“Clint,” Steve huffed out a tired laugh, “Jeez...you have nothing to apologize for, absolutely nothing. Nothing over the past year at all was your fault, and you don’t really need to apologize, even the distancing yourself from the pack thing, the apologies are really for our pride’s sake and not because you have a need to...it wasn’t your fault. And this...this was you doing...exactly what you thought you needed to. Protecting your children against a threat, and you did, you were...you were amazing,” he said the last word said with an edge of awe and reverence and Clint blinked. He hadn’t really thought about it much yet.

“Oh…” he said, “But I got shot and now I’m stuck in bed and didn’t feed the babies-”

“Clint,” Steve said sounding exasperated, “You saved them, all on your own, there were dozens of Hydra agents Clint, and you prevented all of them from taking our children, you got shot doing it too, and almost died from blood loss- god if we had gotten here a second later…” he shook his head, “We’re all just happy you’re alive.”

“That bad?” Clint asked, he felt fine. But he was on medication.

“It was, we had you in the the med room and on a transfusion only seconds after we found you,” he said.

“Huh...how did you guys know?” he asked, because he was feeling a bit foggy, not really sure of what happened.

“JARVIS,” Steve said, “He told us the moment he was cut off from the Tower, we were a long way out by the time that happened, however so it took us awhile to get back,” he let out a breath, “Tony got here first, he’s the one who found you.”

“Oh...oh shit...it wasn’t pretty...was it?” he asked, feeling guilty.

“No.” Steve said, “We got there just as you were being put up on the gurney to take down to the medroom...there was...a lot of blood.”

“Not all of it was mine…” he muttered, but if he was bleeding out, there was probably a lot of it on him anyway.

“No...but it was still too much, it had soaked into the carpet...you were collapsed on the floor, the babies were crying, when we got there Tony was busy trying to keep you alive, and was still in the suit, dead bodies everywhere...god it was…” he took a deep breath, it was probably a lot similar to scenes he’d seen before, about 70 years earlier, “But you were alive, and the babies were okay. We saw the footage of what happened, you...you really were remarkable. Remind me to never make you angry.”  
Clint let out a startled laugh at that, but shook his head, “I was just...doing what I needed to, I guess.”

“And it was exactly what was needed, which is why you should not ever apologize for it again, yeah, you made us worry, but that’s not your fault, so don’t think on it again, just focus on getting better and well...maybe...” Steve flushed and Clint looked down at Maggie who was now mouthing at him through the bandages.  
“Oh…” he muttered, “Um...I’m...I’m gonna need help getting the bandages off…”

“Right,” Steve coughed, Clint sat up more and allowed Steve to unravel the bandages enough to reveal a nipple. Maggie didn’t need much more than that before she was attached and getting the good stuff.

Clint let out a soft sigh when the pressure started to ebb away and he could relax just a bit, he smiled down at her for a moment before looking up again and then realized Steve was still there and never had seen him breastfeeding before.

He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting- no one ever finding out had been a hope- but here he was in front of Steve and he was looking, well, soft. Proud, like he was so happy to see the sight of them like that.

Clint flushed because he just had no idea how to handle that, he wasn’t embarrassed per say, just...not expecting it.

Steve suddenly realized he was staring and then coughed, the soft look on his face smoothing out to a polite smile, Clint missed the softness for some reason but he said nothing as Steve made an excuse to go do something, like the bathroom, or clean, or yeah. And he vanished out the door.

Clint let out a soft sigh as Maggie finished up, he set her down and she went back to sleep, much more at ease this time. Clint noticed the little gates on either side of the bed to keep the babies safe and prevent rolling off so he was okay with letting her just stay where she was.

Then he looked over at Tony who looked pretty much beyond awful looking, even in sleep, he must have been exhausted to have slept through Steve and him talking, and Clint figured he probably was, with worry, if he’d been the one who found Clint and the babies...yeah. Bad.

Clint let out a breath and carefully unwrapped his other nipple, it was difficult because it was so tender and he still needed to keep his wound covered, he hoped Eddie was in a gentle mood. He reached over Tony and gently lifted up the other baby having to breath delicately because it was not easy, trying not to wake Tony, especially with a shot shoulder.

He managed and then Eddie was pleased and happily eating soon enough, Clint slouched against the headboard, his shoulder was seriously starting to hurt now, and he was getting tired. Getting shot sucked. All the trauma to the body made it go into double time to heal which made him more tired than he usually would be after getting hurt.

He didn’t realize he was dozing until he felt a hand on him, he jumped a bit, but then saw it was only Tony.

“Hey...sorry,” he mumbled, looking bedraggled and still very tired, “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

“S’okay,” Clint muttered, noting Eddie was done feeding, he pulled him away from his chest and hissed softly, “Damn...that smarts…”

“You okay?” Tony asked taking Eddie from him and setting him down gently, glancing at Maggie who was still sleeping peacefully.

“Yeah, yeah, fine...just...you know...shot, and breastfeeding?” he smiled, “I’ll be fine, just gonna rest a bit.”

Tony nodded and got up out of bed, he pat Clint’s leg again, “I’ll get you some food, rest first.”

“Food would be pretty great, thanks,” he smiled, he wiggled back down on to the bed after re-wrapping his bandages, he looked at each of his babies in turn for a moment, then dozed off smiling, feeling warm, content and taken care of, and for the first time in his life feeling like it was okay, and that it was right.

 

He awoke after a few days of forced bednrest to the bed dipping just a little, he cracked an eye open and saw Natasha, she was playing with Maggie’s little feet, pretending to bite them, making the little girl giggle. Clint smiled, it was pretty cute. It felt like just the few days Clint had spent in bed the babies had advanced. His babies were growing up way too fast.

“Hey,” he murmured and then grunted when a baby rolled into him and pat at him insistently, he scooped Eddie up and then put him next to his sister so they could babble at each other.

“Hey,” Natasha said back, “Your Alphas are trying to decide what to feed you.”

“Food works,” he said and then rolled his eyes, “They are not my alphas.”

“They seem to think so,” she said cocking her head and looking at him, “And so do you.”

“What? I do not,” he insisted and Natasha snorted.

“Oh, Moy Yastreb,” she cooed, he scowled because Russian was not fair even if he knew what it meant, “You have accepted them as your Alphas, you don’t even care that they had been sleeping beside you all this time. And helping you dress your wound, getting you food, anything you’ll let them take care of, which by your standards is quite a bit.”

Clint blinked. Holy shit she was right, his mouth gaped, opening and closing with nothing to say, Natasha pat his knee.

“It’s okay, Clint, it’s okay to let yourself be cared for,” she said gently, “And...I’m happy, really, I like seeing you being pampered.”

“I do not need to be pampered,” he muttered petulantly.

“Yes, you do,” Natasha said, “And Tony and Steve deserve someone to pamper, and it might as well be the mother of their children,” she smiled down at Maggie, “It’s not going to be easy, not with two little ones, and being a superhero, but with the pack, I’m sure we’ll all be able to manage.”

Clint let out a small shaky breath, “You really think...I can do this?”

Natasha knew he wasn’t just asking about raising the kids, but also being a hero, and being in a pack, and even maybe possibly, being the mate to two alphas.

“Clint, I think this is one of the best things that has ever happened to you,” she reached out and cupped his cheek, “It won’t be without flaws, but nothing good ever is, but I sure think it will be worth it.”

He snorted softly, then placed his hand over hers, “Since when were you so smart?”

“Since always, you just never listened,” she quipped, he stuck his tongue out and then looked down at the giggles he got from the babies.

“Ooooh, you think that’s funny, squirts?” he drawled, making the face again, earning more giggles, he laughed too, “Guess so.”

“Having a party?” Tony asked, walking into the room carrying a tray of food.

“Of a sort,” Natasha replied, tickling Maggie’s feet again to make her laugh.

“Awesome,” Tony grinned and set the tray down at Clint’s feet then scooped up Eddie and kissed him all over.

“Gross,” Clint teased, “Your Daddy is totally gone on you, yes he is, yesss he is!” he cooed at the baby who squealed with giggles, he smirked at Tony who was almost swooning with affection, “Nice.”

“Oh shut up, like you’re any better.” Tony huffed.

“I am actually,” Clint said, leaning back gently so he didn’t hurt his shoulder, it hurt anyway, “I’m Mom.”

Tony let out a surprised laugh, “That’s dirty pool, Barton!” he said but grinned, “But...I’m glad to hear you say that...I don’t think you ever have before...not to me anyway.”

Clint blinked, “Oh...um...yeah.”

Tony smiled at him, “It’s good to hear.”

Clint nodded, “Sure...you bring me food and drugs?”

“Yes,” Tony pushed the tray closer, keeping Eddie in one arm, he’d mastered that trick ages ago, natural one arm holder. Steve meanwhile was still sitting pretty at one hand holder.

Clint took the food and the meds, swallowing the pills first then stuffing his face with food in between making dopey faces at his kids, talking with Nat and Tony and Steve when he returned from training, also with food, but for himself and Natasha if she was interested, Bruce had insisted everyone eat. Clint felt pretty good, totally ignoring Natasha’s smug look, surrounded by his pack. Tony and Steve were there, his babies were there, his annoying best friend too, life was pretty good.

He didn’t really last long, however, always so exhausted after getting hurt, he hadn’t realized he’d started slumping on his good side which happened to be nearest Tony, and thus slumping onto Tony, and didn’t notice falling asleep on him.

Tony did and was really pleased, he helped Clint slip down more so his head was on his lap and pressure was off of his injured side, Tony gently set his hand on Clint’s head, the other man snuffled a bit, but didn’t wake, only moved slightly and let out a soft breath, getting more comfortable now that he was safe and no longer in as much pain.

Tony smiled, “Yeah...this...this is alright.”

“Better than alright,” Steve smiled.

“Don’t do it, Cap, don’t be cheesy.”

“I’d say it was perfect,” Steve replied, smiling even more.

“Uhg,” Tony groaned, “Boo, no, no more cheese for you, your cheese rights have been revoked.”

Steve laughed softly so he didn’t wake up Clint, he cooed down at Maggie who was happily gumming on his finger.

“He really does trust you, you know,” Natasha said, “He never would have fallen asleep so easily in front of people before all of this.”

“Assassin thing?” Tony asked, arching a vaguely amused eyebrow, but his hand was still caressing Clint’s head.

“Partly,” she said, “And partly because he is just as bad as I am when it comes to trusting people, he has been betrayed many times in his life...too many times,” she said, “And even after what has happened, he still trusts you, that’s special. And I’m sure you don’t want to ruin that again,” she said evenly and Steve coughed.

“Are you giving him the shovel talk?”

Natasha looked at Steve because it was clearly not just for Tony, but then she only smiled, “I don’t think I need to do that,” she said sweetly, “Do I?”

Tony opened his mouth but she only sent him a look then got up and left.

“Well….damn.”

Steve snorted, “At least she doesn’t want to kill us now?”

“Ha! You were trying to pin it on me, Rogers! You want to be with him too,” Tony said, hushing his voice when Clint shifted, “That’s a dick move.”

“I’m a lot less obvious than you, but just not to her,” Steve said, “And I’m content to let him decide what he wants for himself. After everything that happened.”

“What and I’m not?” Tony frowned, Steve only gave him a bland look.

“Alright, alright,” he grumbled, “I do...but jeez...the pull is so strong, I just want to keep him safe, he’s been through so much shit, he deserves a break…”

“Yeah...still...his decision to make,” Steve said and Tony pouted.

“I know, I know….think it’d help his decision if I made him a new bow?”

Steve only sighed but smiled fondly.

 

~

 

Clint had been asleep, for a little while, the others had been talking and it was comforting and then Tony’s hand on his hair was just really nice, it felt very good, he’d slipped right off to dreamland for a good hour, but then he’d slipped right back into wakefulness right as things had started to get...interesting.

He was a bit surprised to hear Tony and Steve talking straight up about how they wanted him, that was just not something that made sense in his brain right then. But he was aware that he did have incredibly low self esteem so that might have something to do with it.

But finding out that what Natasha had said was really true, he was comfortable with them, Tony was running his fingers through his hair and he was so relaxed, so comfortable and warm, his babies were nearby, he could feel them, and his alphas...yeah, his alphas, they were there too, life was good, his shoulder still hurt, but it didn’t matter. He got hurt saving his kids, whom he loved and appreciated and only regretted not knowing them sooner.

Eddie was so rambunctious and smart, and Maggie was quiet and watchful but so loving. He couldn’t ask for better babies.

And Tony and Steve?

They were pretty amazing. Tony was his perfect partner in crime, a smartass but caring, he showed his love in grand gestures, and he made a pretty good dad. Clint thought fatherhood had helped him bloom more as a person, Clint was glad he’d finally pulled his head out of his ass and was able to see it.

Steve had always been dependable, kind and had a subtle sense of humor that made him just fun to be around, he was strong and capable and really the ‘perfect’ alpha, and he was absolutely wonderful with Maggie, if still a bit sad at times, Clint wanted to make it so he wasn’t.

Natasha was always there for him and Bruce was the best omega anyone could ask for, and Thor was just a really great friend.

Clint couldn’t ask for a better pack, or a better life really, and who knows what else may come of it?

Life was ever changing, maybe Clint could really let Tony and Steve be his Alphas...but only after he was a Beta again, being an omega sucked, and he was going to make Bruce some cookies...just after he finished his nap.

Yeah, things were pretty great.

 

~Epilogue~

 

“I’m sorry I heard crazy come out of your mouth, you want to what?”  

“Not really a want, Katniss,” Tony said calmly, not letting the arched eyebrow get to him because it was very sexy and totally unfair, especially when he had Maggie on his hip. “It’s something we seriously need to consider.”

“Maybe we don’t, maybe we can just keep them hidden forever,” Clint said stubbornly.

“Clint,” Tony sighed, “I know this isn’t really typical, but we’re more or less celebrities, people are going to find out eventually, and...there have been questions about you.”

“About me?” That caught him off guard.  
“Well you have been out of the public eye for almost two years, not fighting with the Avengers, not even been out of the Tower since Maggie was born,” Tony said and Clint blinked.

“Oh...yeah, I guess so,” he heaved out a sigh, “Shit...fine...we’ll do the stupid press conference...but I don’t have to like it.”

“Hey...you were easier to convince than Steve, so you are more than welcome not to like it,” Tony said and Clint groaned.

“If Steve said no-”

“Steve is only used to being in the press in a 40s way, not in a modern way, back then no one knew anything about families of the famous unless they or someone close to them spilled, press conference is a close as we’ll get to spilling,” Tony said, “It’s a compromise.”

“Fine…” he muttered, “So...we’re gonna what just...be all ‘hey we made these, leave them alone’,” he held Maggie up like Simba in The Lion King and the little girl burbled happily making grabby hands at Tony’s face.

Tony snorted but made a goofy face at the little girl and pretended to nibble on her fingers, she giggled and Clint pulled her back, putting her on his hip again.

“No, they’re going to ask about you, and we’ll tell them...as much of the truth as we can,” Tony said, “We can make it dramatic, ‘where was Hawkeye?’ Well he had some business to take care of, but he’s back now, and then you walk on carrying the babies, everyone freaks out, you glare at them tell them the babies are trying to sleep. They shut up, and then we answer a few questions and then leave, takes an hour, hour and a half tops,” Tony shrugged, “It’s something I’ve dealt with my whole life, if we only give them the hard facts, they’ll get bored, and then we can finally maybe take the kids on a walk in the park- I’m gonna have to hire new bodyguards,” he muttered, Clint arched an eyebrow in curiosity.

“That doesn’t sound like Iron Man talking,” he said and Tony snorted.

“It’s Iron Dad talking-”

“Did you seriously just call yourself Iron Dad?”

“-and he thinks that the babies are going to have personal bodyguards until they’re in their 80s.”

Clint snorted, “Except they are our kids, and that means they will not be normal, if Maggie doesn’t have something super in her I’ll be pretty surprised...I mean even Bruce thinks she has serum in her blood, it’s just not been...’zapped’,” he sighed, “And you know it’s not going to be easy like you think, right? They are not going to be satisfied with the basics.”

“Oh hush, we’ll be fine, and besides Pepper is the one who suggested it and is organizing it, no weirdos allowed.”

“Ah-huh,” Clint said, clearly skeptical, and he looked over at Steve who had just walked in from his work out, “Steeeve…”

“I know, Pepper bullied me into agreeing,” he said, resigned, Clint made a restrained screeching sound sound and kicked Tony in the shin. It wasn’t that hard.

“Ow!”

“You never said anything about Pepper making him agree!”

“It may have slipped my mind?” he said trying to play innocent, Clint kicked him again, turning on his heel and heading out.

“You have to sleep alone tonight,” he added over his shoulder with a huff and Steve had to hold back a laugh, Tony glared at him, but he was trying not to smile too. Clint had really come into his own in the past several months. Bloomed almost, he’d embraced motherhood and able to help with Avengers business and was so glad to finally be a Beta again and he was even good with being squished between two Alphas every night, and even let them hug him and snuggle him, Tony had also managed to kiss him once, on the cheek, when he was half asleep and gotten a pillow to the face in retaliation, but it had been so worth it.

“Where’s Eddie?” Steve asked as Tony sat down to rub his shin.  
“With Pepper,” he sighed, “And I think you two are really overthinking this, it’s not like they’re going to attack us during the damn conference.”

Steve just gave him a look.

 

~

 

Clint was trying to hold off a panic attack, just a little, he was really starting to wish he’d said no, let the babies grow up not using their last names, use generic ones pretend like they’re normal for a while, but then they can’t go out with them, can’t just be a family, a pack. Maybe it’s just terrifying that everyone will know that this is him. He’s a mother. He’ll never ever have a chance of running again.

Somehow that’s not scary. Somehow that makes him settle more, it’s reassuring.

He can’t run, he won’t run, he’s got nowhere to run to, except where he’s already at.

He let out a breath, yeah. He’s good.

He smiled at his two spawn (he says and thinks this with utter warmth and fondness), Eddie was already waddling at nine months, he needed a little help, but he could. Maggie was trying to get there, she just didn’t have the balance, she wanted to do everything her brother did, but could now only manage to stand up with help.

“Clint?” Pepper poked her head in, “It’s almost time.”

“Right,” he sighed, “Come on, spawn, let’s go meet the world,” he said bending down to scoop the two of them out of the playpen, one on each hip.  
He followed Pepper down the hall, managing to keep his cool and not even panicking when he was close enough to the door to hear Tony talking.

“...been doing other things, more important to the Avengers than being out in battle.”

“What could be more important than watching the backs of the mightiest heroes?” someone asked, a reporter he assumed.

“He has reasons, well two reasons to be exact,” Tony said, and that was Clint’s cue he was positive, Tony was just that brand of little shit.

Clint took a deep breath and walked out, ignoring the sudden silence and then immediate burst of questions at his appearance with the babies. He walked over to the chair between Steve and Tony and let each one take their kid then made himself comfortable.

“So who has a question that’s not stupid?” Clint asked into the microphone in front of him.

“Are the babies really yours?!”

“No, I stole them,” he deadpanned, “I said no stupid questions,”

The reporter went pink and another stepped up, “Who is the father?”

Clint arched an eyebrow, “Guess,” he said, not even bothering to gesture to the two Alpha’s holding the babies.

“That one is Tony’s and that one is Steve’s,” he drawled, “Seriously it’s not that hard to figure out.”

“You were pregnant with them at the same time?”

“No, I was pregnant at two completely different times and yet they’re still close to the same age,” he rolled his eyes, “The boy was born first, two months early, didn’t realize I was still pregnant until I passed out.”

“When were they bor-”

“You can do the math, how long was I pregnant? One is two months older, easy.” He also didn’t really want them knowing that much about the babies.

“Aren’t you a Beta?”

“Okay that’s a reasonable question, yes, I am.”

“You’re a Switch.”

“You’re the only one allowed to ask questions,” Clint pointed at the man, “Next.”

“When did the Avengers officially become a pack?”

“Erm…” he glanced at the others, “Well...that’s um...a harder question,” he said, “We were a pack before but not like that close yet and well the babies brought us closer together really, and it’s official now, I suppose.”

“When and how did you decide to have them?”

Clint sighed and leaned back so he wasn’t in range of the microphone to look at the others, “The hell do I say?”

“Whatever you feel comfortable sharing,” Tony said, “Honestly if you just say it was unexpected and you had health complications...it wouldn’t be a lie.”

Clint looked at Steve he only smiled at him in encouragement, Natasha was watching the reporters with suspicion, which was totally not a surprise, Bruce and Thor were also smiling at him, it was up to him.

He sighed and leaned forward again, “The babies were not intentional, in fact...I never would have chosen to be an omega, I didn’t...I was actually kidnapped and then forcibly changed, then Steve and Tony were kidnapped and forced to mate me, my pack rescued me, and things have been hard...really hard, but life is finally starting to even out and...here we are, a pack, stronger and closer than ever.”

“Are the kidnappers still at large? Should we be worried that they’ll start taking other people?” another reporter demanded.

“Not unless someone else is Captain America,” Clint replied, “They were trying to use his DNA to create more supersoldiers, and then Tony’s for his ego-”

“Genius, Barton.” There were a few nervous chuckles from the audience.

“Whatever you say, Stark,” Clint smirked, “People shouldn’t be worried, it was a localized attack on the Avengers, and we took them down anyway, so it’s fine.”

“Clint took down the last of them single handedly, as a matter of fact,” Steve said, “They had one more last ditched effort to get the babies, he wouldn’t have it.”

Clint shrugged, “No one fucks with my kids, simple as that.”

“Mama!” Eddie squealed and the whole room burst into laughter as it sounded like a reprimand for his swearing.  
“Yes baby?” Clint cooed leaning over for Eddie to pat his face, Clint kissed his fingers then turned and did the same to Maggie before facing the audience again, he wasn’t oblivious to the several flashes of light that came from them either.

“Any more questions?”

“Will we be seeing more of them?”

“Not really,” Clint said, “We had this conference to let you all know they exist and that we want to raise them with as much normalcy as possible, they’re already going to have to deal with superheros as their family, they don’t need paparazzi shoving cameras in their faces asking them what kind of formula they drink- organic by the way,” he said, and thinking ‘finally’, it had taken time, but no more breastfeeding. He got a few chuckles for the joke, “So...yeah, this is our courtesy ‘hey leave us alone when we have the kids in public’ message. If you don’t, just a friendly reminder that we have a god, a spy, a rage monster, Captain America, Iron Man and me, an assassin with a licence to kill who won’t stop if my kids are distressed, all on the team. So...just don’t do it. Avenger’s babies, they’re probably the most well protected babies on the planet.”

He leaned back and let Pepper finish up while Eddie demanded to be held by him again, “Child you need to make up your mind with this switching arms things,” he replied taking him and putting him on his lap then he glanced at the others, “Think the threat was too much?”

“Nope, sounded just like a typical mother to be honest, remember when Angelina Jolie got cornered by the Paparazzi and she had her kids with her? Ooooh man, that man’s face was never the same,” Tony said, “So nope, you were fine.”

“Oh good,” he smiled and then looked at Maggie who of course wanted on his lap too he sighed, “Let’s go back upstairs.”

“You wanna do anything in particular?”

“Yeah...I think you all owe me a cuddle pile,” he said smirking at the other Avengers, Steve laughed and Tony made a face.

“I have to cuddle Steve?” he asked like it was some big inconvenience.

“Shut up, Stark you know you want to,” Natasha said and Tony flipped her off, she only smirked.

“Please, when I’m not in the bed he clings to Steve like an octopus,” Clint grinned, Tony gasped.

“I do no such thing!”

“You really do,” Steve said, “You drool too.”

The others burst into laughter as they all stood and started towards the elevator, Clint felt happy and warm, his two babies snuggled up against his chest, his alphas flanking him, his best friend leading the way, his pack behind him, yeah.

Life was pretty darn good.

  
  


The End

  
or is it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's that! I hope everyone enjoyed the story!  
> I do have a sequel planned, but as is...I have about a dozen other fics I'm writing as well soooo it might be a bit of a wait. 
> 
> But otherwise! Thank you so much for sticking with me these few weeks!   
> Until next time!


End file.
